This helped me when I was scared to make the break...
Can't make sense out of crazy.
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2008
Location: In the Bluegrass, Baby!
Posts: 211
This helped me when I was scared to make the break...
For those out there struggling to make a break with the A in your life, this helped me a lot....
I read this online:
It is hard to loose an alcoholic, they need you more than you need them..
Now, that may not be true for every single situation but it certainly was true for mine.
Sure, at first there was a period of him looking as if he was doing well and leaving me in the dust, but over time (and it wasnt that long) the roles reversed and now I'm the one doing much better and he is struggling so in all areas of his life - though he does still put on a very good show.
He is clinging to me while I am mostly okay with him being gone now.
And remember, making a break, taking a break, giving yourself time on your own doesn't mean it is forever. So many of us have this catastrophe thinking, it's either this or it's that. Well, thats not true, take a break, work on yourself and your children if you have them. Treat yourselves kindly, spend time doing enjoyable things. Let the A have time to himself/herself to do whatever he/she is going to choose to do.
I have learned that TIME and DISTANCE do wonderful things for you.
I read this online:
It is hard to loose an alcoholic, they need you more than you need them..
Now, that may not be true for every single situation but it certainly was true for mine.
Sure, at first there was a period of him looking as if he was doing well and leaving me in the dust, but over time (and it wasnt that long) the roles reversed and now I'm the one doing much better and he is struggling so in all areas of his life - though he does still put on a very good show.
He is clinging to me while I am mostly okay with him being gone now.
And remember, making a break, taking a break, giving yourself time on your own doesn't mean it is forever. So many of us have this catastrophe thinking, it's either this or it's that. Well, thats not true, take a break, work on yourself and your children if you have them. Treat yourselves kindly, spend time doing enjoyable things. Let the A have time to himself/herself to do whatever he/she is going to choose to do.
I have learned that TIME and DISTANCE do wonderful things for you.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Arlington, VA
Posts: 4,290
I think this is very important to remember. From what I've read and heard from others, sometimes a temporary separation can make a world of difference for everyone concerned. It doesn't have to end being a permanent separation or lead to divorce unless that turn out to be the best decision.
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