He Ruined Yet Another Nice Evening
Working on me :)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Dallas, Texas
Posts: 14
He Ruined Yet Another Nice Evening
Argh! So I haven't heard from my recovering alcoholic/drug addict ex in about two weeks. I broke up with him after two years of madness and have been keeping distance for now until it's okay to just be friends. It's been a bit lonely but I'm doing okay and getting back into the groove of Single Me. You guys would even be proud to know that I even deleted all the good text messages from him and left the really mean ones on there just to remember!
So why is it that I check my phone tonight and he leaves a message that he won some big tournament yesterday and that he's been accepted to a prestigious MBA program? And on top of that he had called at 10:30 AND gave me a answering window of 30 minutes!
I am sitting here just steaming. I can't believe he has the nerve! The sappy me was proud that he has accomplished a lot lately and a little part of me was sad that he thought to include me in his happiness a day later. But, that was just the first 20 seconds of the whole reaction. The new, improved, healthier me realizes that if he was really genuine, I would have known yesterday. He's really just trying to gloat that he is accomplishing more without me.
And you know what? After re-reading this post, the Sober Recovery member in me says who cares. He doesn't even get a window of opportunity any more with me. I don't need him and I can do A LOT better.
So why is it that I check my phone tonight and he leaves a message that he won some big tournament yesterday and that he's been accepted to a prestigious MBA program? And on top of that he had called at 10:30 AND gave me a answering window of 30 minutes!
I am sitting here just steaming. I can't believe he has the nerve! The sappy me was proud that he has accomplished a lot lately and a little part of me was sad that he thought to include me in his happiness a day later. But, that was just the first 20 seconds of the whole reaction. The new, improved, healthier me realizes that if he was really genuine, I would have known yesterday. He's really just trying to gloat that he is accomplishing more without me.
And you know what? After re-reading this post, the Sober Recovery member in me says who cares. He doesn't even get a window of opportunity any more with me. I don't need him and I can do A LOT better.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 2,936
Heya Theo--
You sound like you're doing great with this stuff! It is hard, but you're not getting suckered in! But the title of your post "he ruined" another nice evening-- well if that's the case then you should totally change your phone number. Seriously - give it some thought - if just hearing this guy call to gloat kills your happy mood then Block His Access!!!
Always remember - he may be "doing great" - but he's doing great without the drug and because of recovery - he's not doing great because now he is "without you!" He's doing better (or more NORMAL) without the drug.
But most importantly it sounds to me like YOU are doing great! Keep it up- you can and will do a LOT better!!
Peace,
B.
You sound like you're doing great with this stuff! It is hard, but you're not getting suckered in! But the title of your post "he ruined" another nice evening-- well if that's the case then you should totally change your phone number. Seriously - give it some thought - if just hearing this guy call to gloat kills your happy mood then Block His Access!!!
Always remember - he may be "doing great" - but he's doing great without the drug and because of recovery - he's not doing great because now he is "without you!" He's doing better (or more NORMAL) without the drug.
But most importantly it sounds to me like YOU are doing great! Keep it up- you can and will do a LOT better!!
Peace,
B.
CindeRella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life!
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Spreading my wings
Posts: 7,163
Theo 
Sorry that you are going through this right now-
I found that after I broke up with my XABF that when my evening was ruined it was because I allowed the phone calls and the text messages, the e-mails etc......when I finally decided that being friends was not an option as he did not stick to his recovery the way I had wished-I had to stick with mine and move on. I changed my phone number’s and the peace began ....
When the time is right we do what we need for ourselves!
Big (((Hugs))))
Sorry that you are going through this right now-I found that after I broke up with my XABF that when my evening was ruined it was because I allowed the phone calls and the text messages, the e-mails etc......when I finally decided that being friends was not an option as he did not stick to his recovery the way I had wished-I had to stick with mine and move on. I changed my phone number’s and the peace began ....
When the time is right we do what we need for ourselves!
Big (((Hugs))))
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