He lost it...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Kent, washington
Posts: 15
He lost it...
The man that i have been posting about finally lost it.
I don't know what to do.
I have been hystarically for hours. I can't seem to stop crying.
He got papers to check into rehab. I was so incredably happy that he was getting help but he couldn't make it till tuesday.
He said that he wanted to drink just get completly drunk up intill the day he had to go but i refused to buy him the vodka he wanted. I couldn't in my right mind help him do this and he has no money.
So he took something of mine that means to world to me, the only ultrasound picture i had of my baby i had a miscarrage with on Oct. 15th 2007 and he tore it to pieces in font of me. The he took money from me took my digital camera and xbox and said he was going to sell them for money to get a drink. I tried to stop him he took my cell phone and snaped it in two told me that he is done with me doesn't know why he bother to stay or so long said that he hope i get hit by a bus and die and left.
He has nowhere to go i have no clue where he is... I am scared he will came back but i want to know that he is ok at the same time. I have never left this alone and scare and heartbroken in my life. I am so lost right now.
I don't know what to do.
I have been hystarically for hours. I can't seem to stop crying.
He got papers to check into rehab. I was so incredably happy that he was getting help but he couldn't make it till tuesday.
He said that he wanted to drink just get completly drunk up intill the day he had to go but i refused to buy him the vodka he wanted. I couldn't in my right mind help him do this and he has no money.
So he took something of mine that means to world to me, the only ultrasound picture i had of my baby i had a miscarrage with on Oct. 15th 2007 and he tore it to pieces in font of me. The he took money from me took my digital camera and xbox and said he was going to sell them for money to get a drink. I tried to stop him he took my cell phone and snaped it in two told me that he is done with me doesn't know why he bother to stay or so long said that he hope i get hit by a bus and die and left.
He has nowhere to go i have no clue where he is... I am scared he will came back but i want to know that he is ok at the same time. I have never left this alone and scare and heartbroken in my life. I am so lost right now.
If you are lost, stand still
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: James Island, SC
Posts: 159
Shudi,
I am so sorry for what you have lost already. His actions are shocking and your ambivalence (scared for yourself, yet also scared for him) are completely understandable.
He is not himself, and yet there is not guarantee that he will be himself again soon, if ever.
For now, can you stay with a friend or family member until he checks in to rehab? I would take with you anything of any importance that is still left in the house. Wish I could offer more... I'm sure others will have more experience with this.
*HUG*
I am so sorry for what you have lost already. His actions are shocking and your ambivalence (scared for yourself, yet also scared for him) are completely understandable.
He is not himself, and yet there is not guarantee that he will be himself again soon, if ever.
For now, can you stay with a friend or family member until he checks in to rehab? I would take with you anything of any importance that is still left in the house. Wish I could offer more... I'm sure others will have more experience with this.
*HUG*
Attitude of Gratitude
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Dayton, Ohio
Posts: 2,305
Take a deep breath Hon, and say a Prayer. I will Pray that God will watch over him, tonight especially.
I'm a recovering addict/alcoholic and I imagine he is scared to death right now. I know when I knew that I was going into tx, I also wanted to stay high and drunk right up until the last moment. I felt as though my life was over. It might as well have been. I was losing my crutch, the only comfort that I ever had. It's truly frightening to someone who is drinking and drugging to give that up, even though it is slowly killing us. There is such a fear of the unknown as well as knowing that once the drugs/alcohol are out of our system, we have to begin feeling what we had been trying to numb and forget all those years.
I am no way saying what he did was right. It's pretty messed up. I do feel that in his mind, he probably feels as though he isn't good enough for you and did what he thinks he must do to run you off. He probably is so afraid right now and it's hard for us alcoholics/addicts to admit fear.
You can only Pray that God watches over him tonight.
And know that when he does come home or when you see him next, he is going to be feeling a great deal of guilt and shame for what he did tonight. Much more than he was feeling before all of this happened. If he needs space when he's first in tx, please let him have it. That may be he way he feels he has to deal with things.
I will Pray for the both of you. May God bring you peace of mind not only tonight, but always,
Judy
I'm a recovering addict/alcoholic and I imagine he is scared to death right now. I know when I knew that I was going into tx, I also wanted to stay high and drunk right up until the last moment. I felt as though my life was over. It might as well have been. I was losing my crutch, the only comfort that I ever had. It's truly frightening to someone who is drinking and drugging to give that up, even though it is slowly killing us. There is such a fear of the unknown as well as knowing that once the drugs/alcohol are out of our system, we have to begin feeling what we had been trying to numb and forget all those years.
I am no way saying what he did was right. It's pretty messed up. I do feel that in his mind, he probably feels as though he isn't good enough for you and did what he thinks he must do to run you off. He probably is so afraid right now and it's hard for us alcoholics/addicts to admit fear.
You can only Pray that God watches over him tonight.
And know that when he does come home or when you see him next, he is going to be feeling a great deal of guilt and shame for what he did tonight. Much more than he was feeling before all of this happened. If he needs space when he's first in tx, please let him have it. That may be he way he feels he has to deal with things.
I will Pray for the both of you. May God bring you peace of mind not only tonight, but always,
Judy
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Los Angeles CA
Posts: 208
Originally Posted by Shudi_85 
So he took something of mine that means to world to me, the only ultrasound picture i had of my baby i had a miscarrage with on Oct. 15th 2007 and he tore it to pieces in font of me.
I don't want to share details but I can deeply relate to the pain this caused you.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,322
He is and has been putting his needs before yours for a long time. Only YOU can stand up for you in this situation. I encourage you to ACT for yourself at this time, to protect yourself from this type of treatment by any person, addict or not, before it escalates any further. He WILL take you down with him in his spiral if you let him. Step away and fight for yourself, honey, please.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 196
I am so sorry. I know this is hard. Just remember the facts. You need someone who can care about you in your life. Keep focused on getting to a safe place for yourself. With possessions, I try to not get too attached because then someone can steal them (like a ring or TV) or the place that I live in can burn down. But I agree that it is unfair what he is doing. You are almost out of this situation. Keep focused on your health and your own recovery. It is going to be nice for you to get a good night sleep.
I have been there myself. This past fall, I cried for almost 3 months in between phone calls, and I have to be happy at my job (I work at a cruiseline). I would cry when I would go to a bookstore and read about alcholism, divorce, or relationships. I would cry when I went to the baby department of Sears (because I felt like it should be easy to have a child and it was not easy--and I was dealing with the extra stress from my husband's alcoholism.)
I have been there myself. This past fall, I cried for almost 3 months in between phone calls, and I have to be happy at my job (I work at a cruiseline). I would cry when I would go to a bookstore and read about alcholism, divorce, or relationships. I would cry when I went to the baby department of Sears (because I felt like it should be easy to have a child and it was not easy--and I was dealing with the extra stress from my husband's alcoholism.)
Member
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 486
There is no excuse for that kind of behavior. KC Sheriff or Kent Police would be a good start. Also, they may have some referrals for counseling and help for people in the situation you find yourself in. Is there a friend or family member who can stay with you for a little bit for support?
Also, you also made the right decision not providing him the means to obtain alcohol. If he is still trying to get drunk just because he is entering rehab, he has missed the point entirely.
Sorry for your pain and thank you for sharing!
:praying
Also, you also made the right decision not providing him the means to obtain alcohol. If he is still trying to get drunk just because he is entering rehab, he has missed the point entirely.
Sorry for your pain and thank you for sharing!
:praying
Live, Laugh, Love
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Between Fenway and the Beach!
Posts: 1,301
I'm so sorry your going through this. If it were me, and my X did that sort of thing i would be getting a restraining order ASAP. You can be sad and upset that he's so sick but i would FIRST take care of myself. It could be you next that he hurts. That is no form of love regardless of how sorry he may be down the road.....it's abuse. Help yourself.
hugs to you.
hugs to you.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Back South where I belong!
Posts: 210
How breathtakingly cruel.
We all feel for you - heartbreak and and feelings of being so alone and scared - we've all been there. Please find somewhere safe. I am so sorry you are going through this.
We all feel for you - heartbreak and and feelings of being so alone and scared - we've all been there. Please find somewhere safe. I am so sorry you are going through this.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: London
Posts: 130
Reading your post made me feel so angry, goodness knows how you felt after it had happened, I'm so sorry that you had such a bad experience.
I can understand that he is scared, I almost understand the fact that he wants to get very drunk on the run up to rehab (my RAB was almost comatose for the two weeks prior) but to destroy things that are precious to you? Who does he think he is? Grrrrrrr
I can understand that he is scared, I almost understand the fact that he wants to get very drunk on the run up to rehab (my RAB was almost comatose for the two weeks prior) but to destroy things that are precious to you? Who does he think he is? Grrrrrrr
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1
I am very new to this site, but I hate to hear that you have to go through this. I am in the same place that you are right now and have never felt more lost. I don't know how to help my husband and i don't know how to help myself. Please be strong and take care of yourself. Don't let him bring you down.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Lake Luzerne
Posts: 1,786
I'm so sorry. Please call the police and step back. This man is a loose cannon. The police can expedite the process of getting him into a facility. He could harm himself or someone else. He is on a rampage and not thinking clearly. Now he will add alcohol to his wild behavior. He is determined to drink. I would interpret his behavior as a big fat call for help. If this isnt enough for you to call the police, what is?
It is for his well being, not against him. He is on a road to destruction and a call change that.
It is for his well being, not against him. He is on a road to destruction and a call change that.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
