xBF´S MANIPULATION
Candace
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Reno, Nevada
Posts: 108
ok..looking at myself..
No wonder Í tend to look at him more then me...when I look at me Im empty.
It easier to see him and his faults then look at mine..I feel better about myself..as if Im not so much of a problem---of course.
It´s a cycle. When I pull myself out by thinking how bad he is..
It doesn´t last that long. But I think of just myself..moving forward closing a chapter and opening another. It seems more positive and more healthy.
It easier to see him and his faults then look at mine..I feel better about myself..as if Im not so much of a problem---of course.
It´s a cycle. When I pull myself out by thinking how bad he is..
It doesn´t last that long. But I think of just myself..moving forward closing a chapter and opening another. It seems more positive and more healthy.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Johannesburg South Africa
Posts: 61
Hi there,
perhaps you can start by looking at and writing down all YOUR QUALITIES (and only through reading your posts I see plenty) instead of comparing (His or Your) FAULTS
Law of attraction....you know...
perhaps you can start by looking at and writing down all YOUR QUALITIES (and only through reading your posts I see plenty) instead of comparing (His or Your) FAULTS
Law of attraction....you know...
Candace
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Reno, Nevada
Posts: 108
It is always better
YES I can see how that works..and it feels positive. I have been in the same rut in the way I think. I know there is a different way. But I didnt know what it was. I have a lot of unforgiveness, so much pain..
When I put energy into my life and what is good for him..and ignore what he bounces in and out of my life with..he knows exactly what to say.
Here in Albacete Spain I couldnt get a restraining order unless he hits me..
I went to the womens refuge to get counsel. And They weren´t interested because he wasn´t hitting me or pushing me.
I went to my first meeting AA last night and it was so refreshing to be around people that were for me.
Right now it is a little difficult to list some good qualities..maybe in a month I can...I´m still in the fog about myself. I have only 5 days sober.
When I put energy into my life and what is good for him..and ignore what he bounces in and out of my life with..he knows exactly what to say.
Here in Albacete Spain I couldnt get a restraining order unless he hits me..
I went to the womens refuge to get counsel. And They weren´t interested because he wasn´t hitting me or pushing me.
I went to my first meeting AA last night and it was so refreshing to be around people that were for me.
Right now it is a little difficult to list some good qualities..maybe in a month I can...I´m still in the fog about myself. I have only 5 days sober.
Candace
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Reno, Nevada
Posts: 108
I have a really stupid question
I have been back in the states for 3 monthe..It took a while to adjust to the culture. Im in AA working the program, I have a sponser,,Im on the 4th stp.
I´m still in contact with my x boyfriend in spain. Which I know is too crazy..but it is true.
He still calls me, and txts me. I don´t want to be in contact but he is like alcohol to me..
I want to ignore him..but he encourages me in my life.
my alcoholic behavior wants him to call when I ak him to...or just respond.
when he doesnt and i dont hear from him..I want to tell him i dont want to be friends with him.
I know we both have control issues...
My sponser sees the good that he does for me..
Why is it so hard to really cut someone completely out of my life when it feels so yucky. We have spent the llast 4 years together.
can you give me some gentle words of wisdom...???
I´m still in contact with my x boyfriend in spain. Which I know is too crazy..but it is true.
He still calls me, and txts me. I don´t want to be in contact but he is like alcohol to me..
I want to ignore him..but he encourages me in my life.
my alcoholic behavior wants him to call when I ak him to...or just respond.
when he doesnt and i dont hear from him..I want to tell him i dont want to be friends with him.
I know we both have control issues...
My sponser sees the good that he does for me..
Why is it so hard to really cut someone completely out of my life when it feels so yucky. We have spent the llast 4 years together.
can you give me some gentle words of wisdom...???
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