Bad news.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 480
Bad news.
In my last post I told you all I got the rental house that would have allowed my dogs. Unfortunately today I got a call from the rental company saying that the owner is putting the house on the market. I'm sooo crushed...
I'm crying and trying to figure out what I'm going to do now. Should have known it was too good to be true.
I have been turned away because of my medicore credit and that I have two dogs.
I'm crying and trying to figure out what I'm going to do now. Should have known it was too good to be true.
I have been turned away because of my medicore credit and that I have two dogs.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 480
The only reason I found this house is because it was listed under the property managment company I was already pre approved for. My exabf rented from them and we moved in together, his Mom co-signed. Therefore making the credit issue not a problem.
Now I am on my own with no co-signer and two strikes against me with the credit and pets.
Now I am on my own with no co-signer and two strikes against me with the credit and pets.
the girl can't help it
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
((((lexusgirl)))))
I have 3 dogs I am very glad I own my property and nobody can tell what to do with my dogs. I know it must be frustrating for you but like anvil said you are an expert now so get on it and find you a place.
I have 3 dogs I am very glad I own my property and nobody can tell what to do with my dogs. I know it must be frustrating for you but like anvil said you are an expert now so get on it and find you a place.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 480
I am afraid that I might as well just stay here with him. Whats the point..I try to do something good for myself and only fail time and time again. I feel defeated and so hurt and everything right now.
I feel like everything is falling apart around me...I am going through another emotionally draining situation regarding my son and it's not going too well either.
Why can't One ****ing thing go right for me?
I feel like everything is falling apart around me...I am going through another emotionally draining situation regarding my son and it's not going too well either.
Why can't One ****ing thing go right for me?
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 1,322
Lexus,
I just got off the phone with my daughter who is/was feeling like it is all hopeless (college) and I will tell you the same thing I told her. You are feeling overwhelmed because there is so much to do it is hard to see where to even start. Break it down into smaller increments. Things you can accomplish in little bits. Eat. Your body and mind need it. Know that you are not alone in this. You have people, and you have a group here who supports you and offers you encouragement and love just when you need it. You have a son! How blessed you are, right? Maybe this situation will not get solved tonight, but tomorrow is a new day, so right now, bite off a little small something you can take care of, feed yourself for strength, and know that this will pass and something else will come up. Finish crying, go wash your face, make a list, and pick one thing to start with that CAN be accomplished. You know darn well you are not staying with that dumb a**, so stop letting your mind go there. Instead, get up and keep putting one foot in front of the other. Life can be very overwhelming if we try to do everything at once. Start with one thing. Peace and love being sent your way, sweetie, and MOM hugs
I just got off the phone with my daughter who is/was feeling like it is all hopeless (college) and I will tell you the same thing I told her. You are feeling overwhelmed because there is so much to do it is hard to see where to even start. Break it down into smaller increments. Things you can accomplish in little bits. Eat. Your body and mind need it. Know that you are not alone in this. You have people, and you have a group here who supports you and offers you encouragement and love just when you need it. You have a son! How blessed you are, right? Maybe this situation will not get solved tonight, but tomorrow is a new day, so right now, bite off a little small something you can take care of, feed yourself for strength, and know that this will pass and something else will come up. Finish crying, go wash your face, make a list, and pick one thing to start with that CAN be accomplished. You know darn well you are not staying with that dumb a**, so stop letting your mind go there. Instead, get up and keep putting one foot in front of the other. Life can be very overwhelming if we try to do everything at once. Start with one thing. Peace and love being sent your way, sweetie, and MOM hugs
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
Lexus,
Take a deep breath. You are trying to do too much right now, perhaps, and this disappointment is just one straw too many....at the moment.
If you take some time to deal with life right now, get some rest, eat well, sleep well, then come back to the house hunt, you will be okay. Know that you will find your right place. Know it's out there, and you will get to it as soon as you can.
Your mind and heart and spirit are just frazzled right now.
Stay away from the chinese water torture from your bf at all costs....that only drags you lower. Slow down a bit, 'kay? Take one step at a time in the right direction, and you will be okay.
Take a deep breath. You are trying to do too much right now, perhaps, and this disappointment is just one straw too many....at the moment.
If you take some time to deal with life right now, get some rest, eat well, sleep well, then come back to the house hunt, you will be okay. Know that you will find your right place. Know it's out there, and you will get to it as soon as you can.
Your mind and heart and spirit are just frazzled right now.
Stay away from the chinese water torture from your bf at all costs....that only drags you lower. Slow down a bit, 'kay? Take one step at a time in the right direction, and you will be okay.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 902
(((lexusgirl))) I'm sorry for your bad news. It'll get better. I had a similar situation and found a place on a fluke when I walked by. I was totally undesirable due to my student status and lack of co-signer. I had to beg and grovel, but I got the place. Something better will come along and it will all work out!
:praying
:praying
Member
Join Date: May 2005
Location: UK and Australia
Posts: 447
Great advise from all above......keep going....one day at a time eh?.....and one thing a time too.
I have been in that so much to sort out too much to cope with over whelming world (as most of us here have many times!)....and it is hard but as said above break it down into smaller more manageable chunks and you will get there.....I wish you a great day with lots of positive thoughts...Phiz :0)
I have been in that so much to sort out too much to cope with over whelming world (as most of us here have many times!)....and it is hard but as said above break it down into smaller more manageable chunks and you will get there.....I wish you a great day with lots of positive thoughts...Phiz :0)
Member
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Boston
Posts: 2,936
Ugggghhhhh. What a total bummer....total...
But like everyone advised you try to take it easy -- don't extrapolate this to be a "sign" of anything, or how "everything" is sh** because of this setback...it is just plain rotten timing.
Take a deep breath, and know that YOU WILL find another place...I can tell you of many times I have gotten apartments with less than stellar credit. Branch out your search - try big management companies and try the classifieds. Look at the bulletin boards in your supermarket or in the town you want to live in....
If you can meet the actual owner or landlord face to face and they see that you are an honest person, be straight with them about your credit tell them the plan you have in place to be able to afford the rent --- whatever it takes Lexus! If you can only apply for a place on paper then include a cover letter explaining your credit and your plans.
Ask.
Ask again.
Just keep asking.
Someone will say yes!
Hugs :ghug3 to you brave girl.. Take it easy. Don't take this out on yourself!! Tell yourself "Nothing is going to stop me."
Keep your head...if there is alot of madness around you this may seem like one more chunk. Stick with your plans honey, they may need to be altered a bit, yes, but just for today, have a plan and stick with it.
I don't know if it's the codie in me or the human being but I wish I could rent you a room right now!!! uh...wait...how many dogs do you have...?
Peace-B.
But like everyone advised you try to take it easy -- don't extrapolate this to be a "sign" of anything, or how "everything" is sh** because of this setback...it is just plain rotten timing.
Take a deep breath, and know that YOU WILL find another place...I can tell you of many times I have gotten apartments with less than stellar credit. Branch out your search - try big management companies and try the classifieds. Look at the bulletin boards in your supermarket or in the town you want to live in....
If you can meet the actual owner or landlord face to face and they see that you are an honest person, be straight with them about your credit tell them the plan you have in place to be able to afford the rent --- whatever it takes Lexus! If you can only apply for a place on paper then include a cover letter explaining your credit and your plans.
Ask.
Ask again.
Just keep asking.
Someone will say yes!
Hugs :ghug3 to you brave girl.. Take it easy. Don't take this out on yourself!! Tell yourself "Nothing is going to stop me."
Keep your head...if there is alot of madness around you this may seem like one more chunk. Stick with your plans honey, they may need to be altered a bit, yes, but just for today, have a plan and stick with it.
I don't know if it's the codie in me or the human being but I wish I could rent you a room right now!!! uh...wait...how many dogs do you have...?
Peace-B.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 480
Thank you Bernedette and Phiz! You all are so kind...((((((((hugs))))))))
peaceteach-Thank you for the "Mom" hugs...my Mom has been deceased since 1989 so that is a "comfort" thing to hear
GiveLove--Funny how you and peaceteach both said to eat, because I haven't been eating much at all lately. I tend to not eat when really stressed out. I had a salad tonight...
Bernedette--You're absolutely right, the more madness around me just makes me even more crazier. I went into the bathroom and sat on the floor and cried...this place was perfect and I thought it was a sign or something.
I know there are other places, but I may end up having to wait a long time before I can get outta here. I had already been approved so I didn't have to "wait in line" for this place. A lot of times when you put your application in somewhere there are 20 other people wanting the same place. Not knowing from one day to the next is difficult.
peaceteach-Thank you for the "Mom" hugs...my Mom has been deceased since 1989 so that is a "comfort" thing to hear
GiveLove--Funny how you and peaceteach both said to eat, because I haven't been eating much at all lately. I tend to not eat when really stressed out. I had a salad tonight...
Bernedette--You're absolutely right, the more madness around me just makes me even more crazier. I went into the bathroom and sat on the floor and cried...this place was perfect and I thought it was a sign or something.
I know there are other places, but I may end up having to wait a long time before I can get outta here. I had already been approved so I didn't have to "wait in line" for this place. A lot of times when you put your application in somewhere there are 20 other people wanting the same place. Not knowing from one day to the next is difficult.
Philippines/Canada
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Left Coast
Posts: 454
Bummer! yoinked out from under ya. It is a pain in the Azz looking for places. I am in the process now and i find landlords are able to be very particular. Craigslist has been good for finding places and i just put in an apartment wanted add. Did a bio about me, included pics, kinda like building a resume. We will see what happens.
Anyway hang in there sis, you will feel better tomorrow.
Anyway hang in there sis, you will feel better tomorrow.
Wipe your paws elsewhere!
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,672
Now, now, now, LexusGirl. When I played the victim, I convinced not only myself but the entire universe that I was an eternal victim. Having bad credit and no co-signer didn't stop you from having a positive attitude and finding a place for you and your dogs a week ago.
A positive attitude brings about action. A negative attitude brings about frustration and failure. The choice is yours. Will you play victim and call it quits so easily, or will you believe in yourself and your ability to find a nice home for you and your dogs and get out there and pound the pavement?
I'd choose option number 2. Years ago, I found a nice townhouse for me, my young daughter, and two dogs. I had no credit and no co-signer. After being turned down by several potential landlords, I found one who--for whatever reason--didn't bother running a credit check on me. It was just the break I needed. I was a responsible tenent. I paid my rent on time and took great care of my rental unit, plus it helped me build a good credit history.
If I had given up after 4-5 tries, I would never have found the break I needed. So what's it going to be? Are you going to give up or get back out there and pound the pavement?
Action yields results. Self-pity doesn't. I'm rooting for you.
A positive attitude brings about action. A negative attitude brings about frustration and failure. The choice is yours. Will you play victim and call it quits so easily, or will you believe in yourself and your ability to find a nice home for you and your dogs and get out there and pound the pavement?
I'd choose option number 2. Years ago, I found a nice townhouse for me, my young daughter, and two dogs. I had no credit and no co-signer. After being turned down by several potential landlords, I found one who--for whatever reason--didn't bother running a credit check on me. It was just the break I needed. I was a responsible tenent. I paid my rent on time and took great care of my rental unit, plus it helped me build a good credit history.
If I had given up after 4-5 tries, I would never have found the break I needed. So what's it going to be? Are you going to give up or get back out there and pound the pavement?
Action yields results. Self-pity doesn't. I'm rooting for you.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 480
Thanks FD
Thank you StayinAlive 
That's what I did just a few hours ago too on Craigslist. I like the fact that you can see a pic of what they're advertising, and what they want as far as deposit and first and last months.
Yeah finding a place is a pain in the azz for sure...and to think I just moved into this place 7 months ago...grrrrrr....
Originally Posted by StayinAlive 
Bummer! yoinked out from under ya. It is a pain in the Azz looking for places. I am in the process now and i find landlords are able to be very particular. Craigslist has been good for finding places and i just put in an apartment wanted add. Did a bio about me, included pics, kinda like building a resume. We will see what happens.
Anyway hang in there sis, you will feel better tomorrow.
Anyway hang in there sis, you will feel better tomorrow.
That's what I did just a few hours ago too on Craigslist. I like the fact that you can see a pic of what they're advertising, and what they want as far as deposit and first and last months.
Yeah finding a place is a pain in the azz for sure...and to think I just moved into this place 7 months ago...grrrrrr....
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
We all have bad days, sweetie. From your progressive posts through this thread, I can already see that you are feeling better and pulling yourself up by your boot straps. This is where the HP comes in......sometimes something bad happens and we don't understand why. But then something BETTER comes along and it all makes sense. Keep looking.....like everyone else has said......you found one great place, you'll find another one!
gentle hugs
gentle hugs
CindeRella is proof that a new pair of shoes can change your life!
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Spreading my wings
Posts: 7,163
I must say that I agree with the postitive attitude towards things in life....when we put out the positive it comes to us.
Sorry that you are going through this
I have in the past used craigs list and another one actually that is good is Sublets apartments rent Apartment rentals rent roommates sublets rooms houses rental Furnished apartment sublease roommate rentals temporary housing short term this shows you listings that takes pets-it is great!
Good luck and keep your head held high!
Sorry that you are going through this
I have in the past used craigs list and another one actually that is good is Sublets apartments rent Apartment rentals rent roommates sublets rooms houses rental Furnished apartment sublease roommate rentals temporary housing short term this shows you listings that takes pets-it is great!
Good luck and keep your head held high!
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 480
I have been extremely stressed lately. This thing with my son has been ongoing for quite some time, but I am dealing with it the best that I can. My counselor is wonderful, she has helped me so much. She says that I am very strong after all that I have been through. She even commented on how well I'm doing and handling this situation with exabf.
Anyhooo...things are ultra difficult with exabf as he brings SO much drama and stress into this house. I never know what to expect from him day to day. Last night he left and hasn't been back, which is nice as I don't have to deal with him.
You all are right, I need to sort one problem out at a time. Like I said he adds so much stress into day to day living even when I totally detach.
I'll get where I need to go I'm sure, I just need to have a little more patience.
Again thank you all for your kind and awesome words!! I don't know what I would do without this forum and all of YOU!!!
:ghug3
Anyhooo...things are ultra difficult with exabf as he brings SO much drama and stress into this house. I never know what to expect from him day to day. Last night he left and hasn't been back, which is nice as I don't have to deal with him.
You all are right, I need to sort one problem out at a time. Like I said he adds so much stress into day to day living even when I totally detach.
I'll get where I need to go I'm sure, I just need to have a little more patience.
Again thank you all for your kind and awesome words!! I don't know what I would do without this forum and all of YOU!!!
:ghug3
Member
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Atlanta
Posts: 31,179
(((Lexus)))
I'm looking for a place to live. Not only is my credit only so-so and I have a cat, but I also have a criminal record. I have been saving for months just to be able to pay deposits. I found the "perfect" apt., but then found out my criminal background check says I'm a convicted felon (I'm not), so I can't even apply for the apt. because no apt. complexes around here will rent to you if you have a felony.
I was overwhelmed when I found out about the felony, but I leaned on several people here and f2f and realized that it's okay. My record is being straightened out, and I keep checking out places. A lot of private rentals don't do credit checks or are more lenient.
I know I will end up at the place I need to be, when I need to be. We've just got to keep doing what we can, keep our eyes open, and tell friends you're looking for a place. You never know when they will know someone who knows someone.
Just wanted you to know you're not alone.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
I'm looking for a place to live. Not only is my credit only so-so and I have a cat, but I also have a criminal record. I have been saving for months just to be able to pay deposits. I found the "perfect" apt., but then found out my criminal background check says I'm a convicted felon (I'm not), so I can't even apply for the apt. because no apt. complexes around here will rent to you if you have a felony.
I was overwhelmed when I found out about the felony, but I leaned on several people here and f2f and realized that it's okay. My record is being straightened out, and I keep checking out places. A lot of private rentals don't do credit checks or are more lenient.
I know I will end up at the place I need to be, when I need to be. We've just got to keep doing what we can, keep our eyes open, and tell friends you're looking for a place. You never know when they will know someone who knows someone.
Just wanted you to know you're not alone.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy
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