How to pick a therapist?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Southern Wisconsin
Posts: 378
How to pick a therapist?
This is something I've considered then dismissed many times. I even made an appointment once and cancelled. I have all these fears. But if you guys could convince me that it does it really truly help and how to find a good one, I might be ready.
I'm quite certain that in romantic relationships I fit the profile of codependent. I'm not exactly certain why I'm like this. I don't come from an alcoholic or broken home. I was shy as a child and teased in school. I never ever had a boyfriend until I was an adult, they haven't all been alcoholics but most of them have been verbally abusive and/or disrespectful. I've also always felt overweight and suffered from lack of confidence due to a bad self-image. So with those acknowledgments where do I go???
I'm quite certain that in romantic relationships I fit the profile of codependent. I'm not exactly certain why I'm like this. I don't come from an alcoholic or broken home. I was shy as a child and teased in school. I never ever had a boyfriend until I was an adult, they haven't all been alcoholics but most of them have been verbally abusive and/or disrespectful. I've also always felt overweight and suffered from lack of confidence due to a bad self-image. So with those acknowledgments where do I go???
Don't get undies in a bunch
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Shore MA
Posts: 7,120
Al Anon meetings are free and by working through the steps of recovery that they use... I am sure you will realize you are a nicer person and more valueable then you think you are. Your self esteem will start to become lifted and the issues you are concerned about will start to change for the better.
You are worth it.
As for...How to pick a therapist?
Just going to meetings and listening to others, you may find someone who has found a good therapist and their recommendation may be the best way to pick one if you still feel the need after a few Al Anon meetings.
You don't need be in an active relationship with an alcoholic to gain from the things we can learn at meetings.
The 12 steps work in all areas of life.
You are worth it.
As for...How to pick a therapist?
Just going to meetings and listening to others, you may find someone who has found a good therapist and their recommendation may be the best way to pick one if you still feel the need after a few Al Anon meetings.
You don't need be in an active relationship with an alcoholic to gain from the things we can learn at meetings.
The 12 steps work in all areas of life.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 5,075
I was referred to mine by my family doctor. She is fantastic and my recovery would be incomplete without her.
Life is funny. A year before I started going to her, AH decided to go to therapy. Our doctor gave him 2 names, one of them the therapist I now see. He chose the other one. Every single thing in life happens for a reason; even though at the time I was blissfully unaware of who she was, she would come to be a very important part of my life.
Life is funny. A year before I started going to her, AH decided to go to therapy. Our doctor gave him 2 names, one of them the therapist I now see. He chose the other one. Every single thing in life happens for a reason; even though at the time I was blissfully unaware of who she was, she would come to be a very important part of my life.
get it, give it, grow in it
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Calif coast
Posts: 3,167
If you are overweight, do they have OA mtgs. in your area?
A therapist I went to a few yrs. ago I found by referral from a friend.
Do you have health insurance? More recently, I found a good therapist from my insurance websight as one in network. Since I didn't have a referral this time I went to see two of them in the same week from the insur. webpage and stayed with the one I liked best.
Weekly therapy appts. can be quite beneficial.
A therapist I went to a few yrs. ago I found by referral from a friend.
Do you have health insurance? More recently, I found a good therapist from my insurance websight as one in network. Since I didn't have a referral this time I went to see two of them in the same week from the insur. webpage and stayed with the one I liked best.
Weekly therapy appts. can be quite beneficial.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Stumbling toward happiness
Posts: 4,706
Hi Sketscher,
You know, finally getting myself to go to a therapist for a few sessions turned out to be one of the wisest things I ever did. There's something about being listened to, someone who is dedicated to helping YOU work through the things that have always caused you pain in life, and come up with a different way of being in your life.......it's an amazing thing. Indescribable.
Several things can help you find one that's right: Asking other people (like Best suggests), checking your insurance if you have it, doing a google search for therapist + your town name + some kind of specialty (self esteem, etc.) or even just leafing through the yellow pages and seeing if anything leaps out at you. I found mine through an ad in a small neighborhood newspaper sitting on a table at a coffee shop where I was writing in my journal. If the first one you try doesn't fit, don't give up -- everybody has a different style and way of working. Learn from it and try another until you get someone that you just click with.
Saved my life. I would not be the person I am today without having hired a "partner" in the form of a therapist to help me through some long-standing issues and suffering.
Good luck!
GL
You know, finally getting myself to go to a therapist for a few sessions turned out to be one of the wisest things I ever did. There's something about being listened to, someone who is dedicated to helping YOU work through the things that have always caused you pain in life, and come up with a different way of being in your life.......it's an amazing thing. Indescribable.
Several things can help you find one that's right: Asking other people (like Best suggests), checking your insurance if you have it, doing a google search for therapist + your town name + some kind of specialty (self esteem, etc.) or even just leafing through the yellow pages and seeing if anything leaps out at you. I found mine through an ad in a small neighborhood newspaper sitting on a table at a coffee shop where I was writing in my journal. If the first one you try doesn't fit, don't give up -- everybody has a different style and way of working. Learn from it and try another until you get someone that you just click with.
Saved my life. I would not be the person I am today without having hired a "partner" in the form of a therapist to help me through some long-standing issues and suffering.
Good luck!
GL
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