hopeangel

lol - seems to be the subject today. i'm cracking up even writing this, but...

i am really curious about something too. ah is normally a very clean person. normally picks up very well after himself. but,....

lately, he is leaving his beer cans or bottles just sit and sit..and sit right there out in the open...(he used to dispose of them right away and hide them or i would throw them out)

i watched him this morning take out the trash and just leave the cans sitting there...WTF? lately he will do this, take everything else out and leave the empty beer cans and bottles.

is he doing this just because he knows it erks me waiting for me to get upset and say something or wanting me to break and throw them out myself? i haven't said a word about it and have just left them sitting there too (the big elephant in the room is now empty bottles and cans in the room that no one is talking about-lol)

any insight into what might be going on here?

darkness_falls

Puzzling. I'm not sure I've witnessed this myself so I don't think I have the answer but my guess is that yes, indeed he wants you to say something. Attention from you maybe? A cry for help? Don't know but would be interesting to hear what others have to say.

Miss Pink

trying to understand why an alcoholic does what he does is like trying to scratch an itch that will never be satisfied.

hopeangel

do you think it might be his way of peeing and marking his territory???

sorry, i gotta find the humor in this....lol.

now seriously?

QueenOfCyprus

My STBXAH used to leave his "near beer" bottles all around the place - just so that I would be sure to notice that he was only drinking the fake stuff - oh what a good boy he is!!! Turns out that it was only a diversionary tactic - he was drinking the real stuff, too!

HopeAngel, I wonder what in the hell he's doing? A cry for help? A statement: "I just don't give a damn anymore?" Or like you said, marking his territory "F* you, I'll do what I want!" Waiting for you to yell so it can be all your fault? Absolute insanity? It's hard to apply any sort of logic to the situation, since logic doesn't seem to fall within the parameters of alcoholics.

My best friend always says about her mentally ill mother: "If what they did made sense, then they wouldn't be crazy!!"

Would love to hear the follow-up on this - are you going to confront him about it? Or wait until the beer cans pile up so high you don't have to look at him anymore? Or take the ironic/creative route and fashoin a lovely elephant statue out of the cans to place in the middle of the living room :-)

denny57

I wonder if he's wondering what you wonder? Someone has to break the cycle.

Astro

For me it was a way of showing my ex that I really didn't care what she thought about my drinking. Sorta like "Yeah. I've had way too much. So what are you going to do about it"? Defiance.

I liked Queen's thoughts, all of those rang true for me. I'd leave a beer can or two out in the open and have a glass of scotch or vodka stashed out of sight for when she left the room.

The funny part is we really never fool anyone except ourselves.

hopeangel

Would love to hear the follow-up on this - are you going to confront him about it? Or wait until the beer cans pile up so high you don't have to look at him anymore? Or take the ironic/creative route and fashoin a lovely elephant statue out of the cans to place in the middle of the living room :-)"

omg queen, i've never laughed soo hard. right now them piling up high enough not to have to look at him sounds pretty good....i think i am just going to let them build up.

he is obviously doing this for some psychological reason with some intent because he picks up everything else and throws the rest of the trash out, soo... i'll let him work out.

Lilyflower

Haven't got one iota. Very strange!!! My abf leaves his lying around but that's just because he became a lazy beep.