He has asked for help, need advice
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: "Somewhere in Ohio" ... little joke from past
Posts: 481
Kermit you asked for advice, but are you going to regret following the advice given here if it goes against what you feel in your heart? I have found the best advice is someone telling me to wait 24 to 48 hours and then see how I feel. The majority of the trouble I have had in my life is due to snap decisions.
Whatever you decide, keep your HP close, guard your children at all costs, and do (or don't) in a spirit of caring. If I were an A, truly wanting help, and not running a game, I cannot imagine anything more devastating to my spirit than someone who claimed to care completely turning their back on me. I'm not talking doing something necessarily, but I mean not even giving me an encouraging word. If I can't even say "I wish you well; I'm calling you a cab and the Salvation Army" I'm just as lost as my XABF. I can't live like that. Just my 50 cents.
Whatever you decide, keep your HP close, guard your children at all costs, and do (or don't) in a spirit of caring. If I were an A, truly wanting help, and not running a game, I cannot imagine anything more devastating to my spirit than someone who claimed to care completely turning their back on me. I'm not talking doing something necessarily, but I mean not even giving me an encouraging word. If I can't even say "I wish you well; I'm calling you a cab and the Salvation Army" I'm just as lost as my XABF. I can't live like that. Just my 50 cents.
Guest
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,826
Yes that is true and if that is the case he needs to start it out on his own steam.
Ngaire
Ngaire
Originally Posted by steve11694 
when dealing with a corrupted brain as alcohol has poisoned it, one does not 100% need to live by the old addage "payback is a Bit h
It is possible that the addict Has FELT ENOUGH HEAT TO actually work towards meaningful sobriety.
It is possible that the addict Has FELT ENOUGH HEAT TO actually work towards meaningful sobriety.
My Cape Is at The Cleaners
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Metropolis
Posts: 1,117
As I recall he has asked for help, like the plane ticket, before and you were there. Well we know the outcome of that.
Nothing much has changed since then. As Satit wrote, AA is free everywhere.
The program is there, and it works. All he needs to do is walk in the door.
Nothing much has changed since then. As Satit wrote, AA is free everywhere.
The program is there, and it works. All he needs to do is walk in the door.
When Pigs Fly
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: california
Posts: 894
like I said, I will do no foot work for him, i will only drop him off on a door step.
This man is sick with no money, no home, oh, not my problem i know I slept just fine last night warm and cozy in my home with my 3 kids close by. Like I saud I have asked the GF not to call e-mail or anything unless he is dean or on his way to California.
Off to get the kids ready for school, my daughter has surgery tomorrow on her knee, much to much to do around here. I will keep busy and do my best to get by each and every day just like I have for the last 20 months.
You all have a great day , Kermmie
This man is sick with no money, no home, oh, not my problem i know I slept just fine last night warm and cozy in my home with my 3 kids close by. Like I saud I have asked the GF not to call e-mail or anything unless he is dean or on his way to California.
Off to get the kids ready for school, my daughter has surgery tomorrow on her knee, much to much to do around here. I will keep busy and do my best to get by each and every day just like I have for the last 20 months.
You all have a great day , Kermmie
Member
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: The Jungle
Posts: 5,435
I don't have any great advice for you but I'll share a thought that I was left with at a family session while my son was in treatment last year.
The leader of this particular session we attended told us that when our loved one gets out of their treatment center, they will have all of the tools to recover. They can't say that they don't know where to turn. They can't say that they don't know where to go. They have the tools.
Everytime I feel the urge to help my son (he is a young adult living on his own), I put my hands in front of me (like a scale) and ask myself "Are you aiding his addiction or are you supporting his recovery." That seems to help me keep things in perspective.
gentle hugs to you
The leader of this particular session we attended told us that when our loved one gets out of their treatment center, they will have all of the tools to recover. They can't say that they don't know where to turn. They can't say that they don't know where to go. They have the tools.
Everytime I feel the urge to help my son (he is a young adult living on his own), I put my hands in front of me (like a scale) and ask myself "Are you aiding his addiction or are you supporting his recovery." That seems to help me keep things in perspective.
gentle hugs to you
Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: where the streets have no name
Posts: 1,078
Originally Posted by steve11694
when dealing with a corrupted brain as alcohol has poisoned it, one does not 100% need to live by the old addage "payback is a Bit h
It is possible that the addict Has FELT ENOUGH HEAT TO actually work towards meaningful sobriety.
It is possible that the addict Has FELT ENOUGH HEAT TO actually work towards meaningful sobriety.
I also know it is ultimately their actions and not their words.
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