hopeangel

ok, after ah said that he was not going to sign the papers for me to get the money from my car accident unless i...(refer to other posts if you don't know what i am talking about). i have been staying at a friends since friday. they are in florida and so i have the whole house to myself to do as i please and i am really enjoying being away from the chaos and the peace and quiet. it is really giving me some time to think and quality me time.

well, i really think that ah could be losing his sense of reality like is talked about. i just didn't think he was that far along in the disease. there have been several incidents that are leading me to believe this.

he told me i was going to h*** just like him. kinda scary. i had to get some things yesterday and was off work for veterans day. so i was home for a little while and saw him. i really do miss him (not the bad him, but the good him) so i started crying and told him that i missed and loved him, but i could not continue to let him hurt me. we talked for a little bit, but he was not budging on signing the papers. i even asked if i could give him a hug. i did and, of course, he tried to take advantage of that little gesture and wanted more... i left in a hurry then.

i called him that night to try and talk with him without fighting. (yes, i'm ready for the swift kick in the butt you all are going to give me for that)... i asked if he was sober and if we could talk. he said he was sober. it became obvious pretty quick that he wasn't. so, them he starts making no sense at all...telling me that i should forget about the money and give it to charity and we could start working on other goals. he kept telling me to give the money to charity???? i asked him why i would do that and explained that i could not understand what he was saying and it didn't make any sense to me. he started accusing me of cheating on him and then asked to speak to the people i am staying with. i probably made a mistake telling him that they were in florida. (i was really scared he was going to come there-still am) he said that he had friends drive by when i said i was there and i wasn't. he kept repeating himself and saying the same things and asking the same questions. ALL THIS AFTER A SPEECH I GOT EARLIER ABOUT HOW HE WAS NOT EVEN DRIVING BY THE HOUSE I AM STAYING AND THAT I COULD BE SHACKING UP WITH SOMEONE ELSE FOR ALL HE KNOWS BECAUSE HE IS NOT THE JEALOUS OR POSSESIVE TYPE AND HASN'T EVEN BEEN BY THE HOUSE TO CHECK. humm???? direct contradiction there. so, he is just making up all these things in his head. i have caught him doing this in the past too. out right lies and fabricating stories. he was talking to himself in the basement one time i over heard him drunk saying "your not too smart are you? i'm going to beat your head in." scary again.

also, i've only been at my friends since friday and he thinks i have been there a week already. i also talked to the atty. about what he was trying to do to me last monday and he thinks it has been two weeks since i talked to him. so he has lost all sense of time too.

what is all this about ? what am i dealing with here.

tollbooth

Hello again angel! Glad you have found a place to gather your thoughts and serenity, free from outside disturbances.

From the AH's point of view, of course he seems to be going nuts. Thats why he is blaming you, deflecting the problem upon your side, and generally victimizing himself by saying you are cheating on him in the relastionship. For gosh sakes, he's even got friends doing drive-bys at the house your staying? "Go check the place out for me, will 'ya? I wanna find out who this guy is she's shacking up with."

As for the constantly repeating himself, my xa did the same thing while drinking. Almost like she forgot she had just said it, or enjoyed the way saying it made her feel, so kept on saying it again and again. I take it this might be a somewhat newer behavior he's displayed?

Lilyflower

Going back a few years ago...I caught my abf talking to himself on and off for a few months. It would always be random babbling, sometimes he would be argueing with someone, other times he would be having a conversation with someone who wasn't there. If I ever caught and asked him 'who are you talking to?' there would be a hugh outburst from him, he wasn't talking to any one blah blah.

He hardly does it now. Never did figure out what the heck it meant.

hopeangel

toll, this extent of delusional behavior and the extent of just fabricating and making up stories, lying about insignificant things, is fairly new. or is it that i am just able to see it and pick up on it now???

it is just completely irrational behavior and talk and i don't think he even knows what it is he is saying or if he actually believes the things he is saying????????

i have heard of alcoholism causing mental illness and such, but i just didn't think he could be at that stage .

lilly, ah talks to himself in the basement and yells and hollars sometimes.