Something a little bit lighter to give us a laugh
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Something a little bit lighter to give us a laugh
Drinking stories that put yours to shame
History full of drinking stories that are hard to swallow
-Bartenders in canoe dipped drinks from alcohol fountain
-Brew-nami of 1.3 million gallons of beer killed 9 people
-Sailors drank vat of rum preserving dead body of Adm. Nelson
By Ian Lendler (Mental Floss) -- Turns out, the best drinking stories in history are actually, well, historical. So raise a glass to your forefathers and marvel at these tales.
1. Admiral Edward Russell's 17th-Century throwdown
Think you can drink like a sailor? Maybe you should take a moment to reflect on what that truly means.
The record for history's largest cocktail belongs to British Lord Admiral Edward Russell. In 1694, he threw an officer's party that employed a garden's fountain as the punch bowl.
The concoction? A mixture that included 250 gallons of brandy, 125 gallons of Malaga wine, 1,400 pounds of sugar, 2,500 lemons, 20 gallons of lime juice, and 5 pounds of nutmeg.
A series of bartenders actually paddled around in a small wooden canoe, filling up guests' cups. Not only that, but they had to work in 15-minute shifts to avoid being overcome by the fumes and falling overboard.
The party continued nonstop for a full week, pausing only briefly during rainstorms to erect a silk canopy over the punch to keep it from getting watered down. In fact, the festivities didn't end until the fountain had been drunk completely dry.
2. The London Brew-nami of 1814
The Industrial Revolution wasn't all steam engines and textile mills. Beer production increased exponentially, as well. Fortunately, the good people of England were up to the challenge and drained kegs as fast as they were made. Brewery owners became known as "beer barons," and they spent their newfound wealth in an age-old manner -- by trying to party more than the next guy.
Case in point: In 1814, Meux's Horse Shoe Brewery in London constructed a brewing vat that was 22 feet tall and 60 feet in diameter, with an interior big enough to seat 200 for dinner -- which is exactly how its completion was celebrated. (Why 200? Because a rival had built a vat that seated 100, of course.)
After the dinner, the vat was filled to its 4,000-barrel capacity. Pretty impressive, given the grand scale of the project, but pretty unfortunate given that they overlooked a faulty supporting hoop. Yup, the vat ruptured, causing other vats to break, and the resulting commotion was heard up to 5 miles away.
A wall of 1.3 million gallons of dark beer washed down the street, caving in two buildings and killing nine people by means of "drowning, injury, poisoning by the porter fumes, or drunkenness."
The story gets even more unbelievable, though. Rescue attempts were blocked and delayed by the thousands who flocked to the area to drink directly off the road. And when survivors were finally brought to the hospital, the other patients became convinced from the smell that the hospital was serving beer to every ward except theirs. A riot broke out, and even more people were left injured.
Sadly, this incident was not deemed tragic enough at the time to merit an annual memorial service and/or reenactment.
3. New York state of mind: The Dutch ingratiate themselves to the natives
In 1609, the Dutch sent English explorer Henry Hudson westward for a third attempt at finding the fabled Northeast Passage. A near mutiny forced him southward, and upon reaching land, he encountered members of the Delaware Indian tribe.
To foster good relations, Hudson shared his brandy with the tribal chief, who soon passed out. But upon waking up the next day, he asked Hudson to pour some more for the rest of his tribe. From then on, the Indians referred to the island as Manahachtanienk -- literally, "The High Island."
And not "high" as in "tall;" high as in "the place where we got blotto." Most people would agree that Manhattan has stayed true to the spirit of its name ever since.
4. The worst aftertaste in history
In 1805, British Admiral Horatio Nelson was killed during the Battle of Trafalgar off the coast of Spain. Most sailors were simply put to rest at sea, but as an admiral, Nelson had to be brought back to England for an official burial.
To preserve his body during the voyage home, the second-in-command stored Nelson's body in the ship's vat of rum and halted all liquor rations to the crew. Not a bad idea, but when the ship reached port, officials went to retrieve Nelson's body and found the vat dry.
Disregarding good taste (in every sense), the crew had been secretly drinking from it the entire way home. After that, naval rum was referred to as Nelson's Blood.
5. Indian elephants raid the liquor cabinet
No wonder they don't sell beer at the circus. Apparently, elephants like to get wasted. In fact, an outpost of the Indian army in the jungle region of Bagdogra has been under attack ever since a local herd of elephants raided the base in search of food and discovered the soldiers' entire winter rations of rum.
Since then, the pachyderms have regularly raided the base for a drink and have smashed down all defenses put up by the army, including electrified fences and firewalls.
According to The Daily Telegraph, "An officer recently posted there explained that the elephants broke the rum bottles by cleverly curling their trunks around the bottom. Then they empty the contents down their throats. They soon got drunk, he said, and swayed around. They enjoy themselves and then return to the jungle."
This is by no means a singular incident, though. The animal kingdom is well-known for its ability to identify fruit that's begun to ferment. Anthropologists even believe this is how early man discovered alcohol -- by observing the strange behavior of animals on a fruit bender.
For more mental_floss articles, visit mentalfloss.com
History full of drinking stories that are hard to swallow
-Bartenders in canoe dipped drinks from alcohol fountain
-Brew-nami of 1.3 million gallons of beer killed 9 people
-Sailors drank vat of rum preserving dead body of Adm. Nelson
By Ian Lendler (Mental Floss) -- Turns out, the best drinking stories in history are actually, well, historical. So raise a glass to your forefathers and marvel at these tales.
1. Admiral Edward Russell's 17th-Century throwdown
Think you can drink like a sailor? Maybe you should take a moment to reflect on what that truly means.
The record for history's largest cocktail belongs to British Lord Admiral Edward Russell. In 1694, he threw an officer's party that employed a garden's fountain as the punch bowl.
The concoction? A mixture that included 250 gallons of brandy, 125 gallons of Malaga wine, 1,400 pounds of sugar, 2,500 lemons, 20 gallons of lime juice, and 5 pounds of nutmeg.
A series of bartenders actually paddled around in a small wooden canoe, filling up guests' cups. Not only that, but they had to work in 15-minute shifts to avoid being overcome by the fumes and falling overboard.
The party continued nonstop for a full week, pausing only briefly during rainstorms to erect a silk canopy over the punch to keep it from getting watered down. In fact, the festivities didn't end until the fountain had been drunk completely dry.
2. The London Brew-nami of 1814
The Industrial Revolution wasn't all steam engines and textile mills. Beer production increased exponentially, as well. Fortunately, the good people of England were up to the challenge and drained kegs as fast as they were made. Brewery owners became known as "beer barons," and they spent their newfound wealth in an age-old manner -- by trying to party more than the next guy.
Case in point: In 1814, Meux's Horse Shoe Brewery in London constructed a brewing vat that was 22 feet tall and 60 feet in diameter, with an interior big enough to seat 200 for dinner -- which is exactly how its completion was celebrated. (Why 200? Because a rival had built a vat that seated 100, of course.)
After the dinner, the vat was filled to its 4,000-barrel capacity. Pretty impressive, given the grand scale of the project, but pretty unfortunate given that they overlooked a faulty supporting hoop. Yup, the vat ruptured, causing other vats to break, and the resulting commotion was heard up to 5 miles away.
A wall of 1.3 million gallons of dark beer washed down the street, caving in two buildings and killing nine people by means of "drowning, injury, poisoning by the porter fumes, or drunkenness."
The story gets even more unbelievable, though. Rescue attempts were blocked and delayed by the thousands who flocked to the area to drink directly off the road. And when survivors were finally brought to the hospital, the other patients became convinced from the smell that the hospital was serving beer to every ward except theirs. A riot broke out, and even more people were left injured.
Sadly, this incident was not deemed tragic enough at the time to merit an annual memorial service and/or reenactment.
3. New York state of mind: The Dutch ingratiate themselves to the natives
In 1609, the Dutch sent English explorer Henry Hudson westward for a third attempt at finding the fabled Northeast Passage. A near mutiny forced him southward, and upon reaching land, he encountered members of the Delaware Indian tribe.
To foster good relations, Hudson shared his brandy with the tribal chief, who soon passed out. But upon waking up the next day, he asked Hudson to pour some more for the rest of his tribe. From then on, the Indians referred to the island as Manahachtanienk -- literally, "The High Island."
And not "high" as in "tall;" high as in "the place where we got blotto." Most people would agree that Manhattan has stayed true to the spirit of its name ever since.
4. The worst aftertaste in history
In 1805, British Admiral Horatio Nelson was killed during the Battle of Trafalgar off the coast of Spain. Most sailors were simply put to rest at sea, but as an admiral, Nelson had to be brought back to England for an official burial.
To preserve his body during the voyage home, the second-in-command stored Nelson's body in the ship's vat of rum and halted all liquor rations to the crew. Not a bad idea, but when the ship reached port, officials went to retrieve Nelson's body and found the vat dry.
Disregarding good taste (in every sense), the crew had been secretly drinking from it the entire way home. After that, naval rum was referred to as Nelson's Blood.
5. Indian elephants raid the liquor cabinet
No wonder they don't sell beer at the circus. Apparently, elephants like to get wasted. In fact, an outpost of the Indian army in the jungle region of Bagdogra has been under attack ever since a local herd of elephants raided the base in search of food and discovered the soldiers' entire winter rations of rum.
Since then, the pachyderms have regularly raided the base for a drink and have smashed down all defenses put up by the army, including electrified fences and firewalls.
According to The Daily Telegraph, "An officer recently posted there explained that the elephants broke the rum bottles by cleverly curling their trunks around the bottom. Then they empty the contents down their throats. They soon got drunk, he said, and swayed around. They enjoy themselves and then return to the jungle."
This is by no means a singular incident, though. The animal kingdom is well-known for its ability to identify fruit that's begun to ferment. Anthropologists even believe this is how early man discovered alcohol -- by observing the strange behavior of animals on a fruit bender.
For more mental_floss articles, visit mentalfloss.com
Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Starting over all over again
Posts: 4,426
Wow. And I thought I had heard it all where it comes to alcoholic insanity. The more I learn about this disease the more grateful I am to be finally _out_ of it.
Thanx for sharing this, tollbooth, it helps me get some perspective.
Mike
Thanx for sharing this, tollbooth, it helps me get some perspective.
Mike
Member
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 477
Some of those tales reminded me of this William Hogarth print and the history behind it makes interesting reading.
William Hogarth (1697-1764), Gin Lane. 1750
This scene of drunken confusion is imaginary, but Hogarth nevertheless shows in the distance the steeple of St George's, Bloomsbury with its statue of George I wearing a toga. He is pointing out the association between excess in artistic style with excess in private manners and morals, and perhaps also the inability of the government and the church to remedy the evil effects of gin. The steeple was originally adorned with lions, unicorns, festoons and crowns (these gorgeous baroque touches were removed in 1871). Horace Walpole called the building a 'master-stroke of absurdity', and the Pocket Guide to London says that the church 'enjoys the privilege of being at once the most pretentious and ugliest ecclesiastical edifice in the metropolis. All the absurdities of the classic style are here apparent.'
The print was produced as part of a campaign to restrict the sale of gin (and bad taste in art), the effects of which are graphically depicted here: buildings are allowed to go derelict, children die from neglect, the honest businessman hangs himself for lack of trade, the pawnbroker prospers, the gin manufacturer thrives, the coffin maker does excellent business and the general population create mayhem.
Gin was first produced in Holland in the early 17th century and became popular in England after the arrival of William and Mary from the Netherlands in 1688, when regulations regarding distillation were relaxed. It was a cheap and a strongly alcoholic drink, advertised with the following catch phrase:
Drunk for a Penny
Dead drunk for two pence
Clean straw for Nothing
Drunkenness became a major social problem and the government subsequently made several attempts to control its sale, including the Gin Act of 1736, which required retailers to obtain a licence for £50 and increased duty fivefold, but this measure was very unpopular, and various means of evasion were practised, for example the sale of gin under other names, including 'Ladies Delight', 'Strip-me-Naked', and 'Cuckold's Comfort', and the government was forced to repeal the Act following riots in 1743. Another more successful attempt to legislate was made in 1750.
ARL
William Hogarth (1697-1764), Gin Lane. 1750
This scene of drunken confusion is imaginary, but Hogarth nevertheless shows in the distance the steeple of St George's, Bloomsbury with its statue of George I wearing a toga. He is pointing out the association between excess in artistic style with excess in private manners and morals, and perhaps also the inability of the government and the church to remedy the evil effects of gin. The steeple was originally adorned with lions, unicorns, festoons and crowns (these gorgeous baroque touches were removed in 1871). Horace Walpole called the building a 'master-stroke of absurdity', and the Pocket Guide to London says that the church 'enjoys the privilege of being at once the most pretentious and ugliest ecclesiastical edifice in the metropolis. All the absurdities of the classic style are here apparent.'
The print was produced as part of a campaign to restrict the sale of gin (and bad taste in art), the effects of which are graphically depicted here: buildings are allowed to go derelict, children die from neglect, the honest businessman hangs himself for lack of trade, the pawnbroker prospers, the gin manufacturer thrives, the coffin maker does excellent business and the general population create mayhem.
Gin was first produced in Holland in the early 17th century and became popular in England after the arrival of William and Mary from the Netherlands in 1688, when regulations regarding distillation were relaxed. It was a cheap and a strongly alcoholic drink, advertised with the following catch phrase:
Drunk for a Penny
Dead drunk for two pence
Clean straw for Nothing
Drunkenness became a major social problem and the government subsequently made several attempts to control its sale, including the Gin Act of 1736, which required retailers to obtain a licence for £50 and increased duty fivefold, but this measure was very unpopular, and various means of evasion were practised, for example the sale of gin under other names, including 'Ladies Delight', 'Strip-me-Naked', and 'Cuckold's Comfort', and the government was forced to repeal the Act following riots in 1743. Another more successful attempt to legislate was made in 1750.
ARL
Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: England
Posts: 3,410
It doesn't escape me that most of these examples are from the UK. That Hogarth picture is not far from the truth in more parts of this country than I would care to admit.
We have a massive alcohol problem over here and very few people will acknowledge it. Most of our towns and cities are no-go areas for many people on weekend evenings - my Mum was only saying yesterday that she would not go into out local town on a Friday or Saturday night for a meal without knowing she was parked very nearby the restaurant. And this town is supposed to be one of the more "genteel" of our country.
Hell in a handcart - alcohol is but a symptom.
We have a massive alcohol problem over here and very few people will acknowledge it. Most of our towns and cities are no-go areas for many people on weekend evenings - my Mum was only saying yesterday that she would not go into out local town on a Friday or Saturday night for a meal without knowing she was parked very nearby the restaurant. And this town is supposed to be one of the more "genteel" of our country.
Hell in a handcart - alcohol is but a symptom.
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