Lilyflower

I'm sorry I made you cry Terri. Your posts are very close to my heart because I can see myself in you. I am including a link if you want to use it to get some answers about depression... www.psychologyinfo.com/depression/.

I agree with others here that you need a major time out. Can you book some time off work? There are meditation retreats that you could go to, spend some time exploring your mind, find that strength you so desperately need. Many retreats of this sort are very calming and peaceful, and often you get to live in the centre for the week or weekend of the retreat. You won't get followed there. Check out where your nearest meditation centre is. I found that the NKP was right for me check out their web... http://kadampa.org/ .

If you can bounce back without treatment, thats great. For me, I went through therapy and trying to cope, but medication is the only thing I have found that has cleared away the fog. I am under review at the moment and hoping that my next appointment will mean I can start to come off meds. For me, taking meds has enabled me to cope with life in a way I haven't been able to do for years.

Barbara52

From my point of view, God will lead but expects us to act. My understanding of God does not include him somehow just making change happen. From what I've been reading I'm getting the impression that you know what you need to do for yourself but are choosing not to because its going to be hard and not a smooth road.

You can indeed make a change today. But first you have to choose to initiate that change.

GiveLove

I often break from AlAnon because I happen to believe that we are the body that brings God's will to life, makes it flesh so to speak. God has no body of his own...he relies on us to initiate his chosen actions. If I had stayed in my hellish relationship, my suffering would not be God's will...it would be my will, with me trying to re-write God's will so it sounds better on paper.

minnie

I believe that we have a natural urge towards growth. I don't believe in an interventionist god, however I do believe that we know when we are acting outwith out natural urges. That's why I left my ex - becauase I couldn't grow in the way I felt I needed to in my core.

I have known a lot of people over the years who are in intolerable situations, but only in my eyes. They are uncomplaining, though, and would not dream of seeking out a forum. I really do believe that coming here indicates a push from the spirit that things aren't how it needs to be to achieve fullfillment. Some may call that their god's work and perhaps that's how you need it framed.

Bottom line, it is clear that change needs to happen for you, QT, and relying one someone else to make that change is futile. You are strong - and in your weak moments, you have all of us here. I know at first hand the power of the people on here to catch you when you are falling. Trust us.