"Getting them Sober" and he doesnt "get it"

Old 10-21-2007, 10:12 PM
  # 21 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by prodigal View Post
In the State of Arizona, interventions do not mean squat. The addict MUST say he wants to go to detox/rehab. In this state, an addict has the right to drink or drug himself to death - period. If I staged an intervention at this point, AH would not understand what was being said to him anyway.

He has been hospitalized THREE times this past week; once by me and twice by the sheriff's department. That's how bad off he is. A psychiatrist and psychologist both admitted AH is incompetent; however, he does not fall under "Title 36" of this state to be adjudged incompetent. Why? Because his dementia is due to acute alcohol addiction, not an actual mental illness.

I believe interventions can work. A competent interventionist CAN be successful. In my case, it would be a crap shoot. The law will protect my AH's right to kill himself. At this point, down to 130 lbs. (he's 5'8") and covered in bruises, welts, and cuts, and babbling incoherently at all hours, I don't think intervention is an option. Sad, but true ...

Interventions usually present a choice for the addicted person to make; basically it is a gathering of people who care that come together to state their love for the person and then tell them the boundaries that they have decided to put into practice in their own lives if the A does not decide to go into recovery. It is a group of important people who decide they no longer want to help contribute to the disease and they come together in a united front....that helps break the denial of the problem. No one can "force" them into treatment or make them stay...let alone make them want to work at it. However, if someone with leverage (ie boss and treatment or terminate job AND the boundaries are held!) then sometimes the person may actually go to treatment,become sober and start to listen to the information and then decide to participate. It "raises the bottom" sometimes for some lucky people. Eventually it is the consequences that make people turn to recovery.....this is a variation of the spiral,etc...jmho.

If the person decides not to seek treatment,so be it. The person then lives by the boundaries that they have decided work best to protect them from the harm of the addiction and the know that they have made clear what they are, and why they are the way they are and give the addict's problem back to him/her where it belongs.

They are evidently best when they still have "things to lose".
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Old 10-21-2007, 10:32 PM
  # 22 (permalink)  
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I absolutely agree, Pick. I spoke with AH's boss twice this past week after he called to find out what was going on. He didn't know what "disciplinary action" he would pursue, but he mentioned 30 to 60 days of leave without pay. Excuse me????

I told AH's boss that AH is ALREADY holed up in the house and whether he's paid or not, he probably won't get the "help" the boss said he wants to see him get if he's suspended w/o pay!

I suggest the EAP ("Employees' Assistance Program) people might want to get some co-workers together to stage an intervention. "Well, I dunno if we can do that or not...." Well then find out Mr. Bureaucrat! I agree that if AH was given the choice of detox/rehab or job loss, it might work. But ... the federal government works in strange ways. Bossman assured me AH would not be fired. It's got me scratching my head ....
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Old 10-21-2007, 10:39 PM
  # 23 (permalink)  
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Originally Posted by Pick-a-name View Post
I guess what I am saying is you never know what.when,where,who,etc the A's HP will use to deliver His message. What the A decides to do with it, is his own choice.
Exactly. And when the end of the rope is reached, sometimes the so-called "walking away" does the trick. It's up to the alcoholic, just as it's up to me.
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Old 11-13-2007, 03:32 PM
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the books are very helpful
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