sadmom

Another big question really.... Have any of you gotten a counselor for your kids or have you just learned how through therapy and group yourselves how to talk to your kids about what is going on. What is essential in your minds that you tell them or to explain to them? My oldest is 5 and has seen what I feel is enough. She does not ask about dad in his absence at all. I've been reading the "big book" and I totally did the "daddy is just really really sick and he might not be home...." It's bizarre to read exactly my life.

spedteach

sadmom,

I too am dealing with the same kind of questions in regards to how do I explain to my son (who turns 4 on 6/11) that daddy had to move out if and when I do kick him out???? It's a good question..anyone with solutions or btdt please offer what you did???

Ann

Although I have never been through this, I know that when my father died and I was 6 years old, it would have been helpful if I had been able to talk about it.

I think my mother thought she was protecting me by not bringing up the subject, but I remember the pain I felt and kept inside, because I didn't want to upset anyone either. Any wonder why I am codpendent?

Keep it on a level appropriate for their age, but encourage them to get it out. It WILL come out sooner or later, and better now than later through anger, depression or addiction.

I think you are pretty terrific to even think of this.