again
 

AH said he was not going to drink this weekend. He wanted to make it to late October when he is going away.

But he only made it until sunday.

And I let my heart be broken again.


When am I going to stop letting myself get my hopes up over this?? My heart cannot take it anymore.

This morning he calls as if nothing is wrong.

He knows I'm mad and say's he will try.

My heart aches. I want to hug him. I want to hold him. I want to tell him it's going to be all right. I want him to tell me it's going to be alright.
But of course, I know it's not.
We both go away mad and now I take the chane of him spending the day drinking again.

My heart hurts for you, and I know your pain. You want to believe, to trust, to see a change. They drink. You cry. He promises. You trust. He drinks. On and on goes the circle.

I don't have a single answer, but I do commiserate with you.

hi luv
 

When am I going to stop letting myself get my hopes up over this?? My heart cannot take it anymore.[/QUOTE]


you will when you are sick and tired of being sick and tired and feeling that way-plain and simple. when it is too much for YOU, then you will make the changes you need to make for yourself. we codies have to hit our bottoms too.

i had to learn that my happiness and quality of life does not depend on another persons actions, it depends on me and my actions.

hope this helps hon. take care

Oh, Luv, I'm so sorry! I know just what you are going through. I just recently divorced my AH and I still find myself getting my hopes up. I told someone the other day that I'm still so surprised everytime he drinks. I guess I want to believe it.

But, what has helped me is remembering that his drinking isn't about me and there isn't anything I can do to stop it. It's about him and therefore, he has to be the one to get help for himself.

I'm so sorry for your pain!
(((((LUV))))))

Luv, I also know what you are going through, like hopeangel wisely says you will hit your own bottom when you have had enough, I never thought that i would but i did. And thats when you will start to feel better. You'll have good days and bad days, the pity I felt for my alcoholic held me back and still does sometimes.

Make plans for you, keep them to yourself, when he does get drunk again do something nice for you. this is not your fault, and you can not cure it.

Thinking of you

M x

Luv, I feel the same way. When he messes up and feels so bad the next day. I want to hug him, tell him it will be oK. But of course that is what he wants you to do. So he know the next time he messes up you will be there still...he will not stop until he decides to. You will put up with it till you don't. No one knows how long that will be. Not even you! I feel for you, you are not alone... do something nice for you today!