No longer the Bad Guy
 

Seems I am always the bad guy ruining AH's good time. He "deserves" to drink all weekend long, he works hard all week (and drinks then too, but only a "few")!! (anyone else know where this is going? LOL)
So last night, on the eve of my daughter's 14th birthday, I told him I was done being the bad guy and was filing for divorce. I feel so good! I have to admit I do have some sadness in my heart that after 15+ years together this is where it ends, but mostly I am relieved that I have stood up for myself, FINALLY. I dont know how the road ahead looks, but it cant be much worse than the life I have been living with AH. This has been a long time coming and I just never wanted to admit that I couldnt "fix" him and make him want to be the husband and father he should be. So now it is up to me to make this right for me and my kids :-) Nobody knows about this yet, but we have some details to figure out and will be signing the papers next week if all goes according to plan. That is if he doesnt object to everything. Which, knowing him he will. But, either way a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders and I can stand tall and know I have done the right thing and have done everything and anything I could to save this marriage. Unfortunately I was the only one trying. :e106:

support out to you, kacee. k

Good for you, Kacee! At least you will travel the road of your choice, not one dictated by alcoholism. It isn't easy, but it's worth it.

((()))

After you've done all that you could to no avail, it's wonderful that you have chosen to save the 'passengers' vs. the ship (marriage).

Wow you went though 15 years with this. Im fed up after just over a year.

Mark is just the same hun. I think its time he leaves to. Good luck to you hun.

Something my couseller said "I DESERVE BETTER" and so do you.

(((((Kacee))))))

Great for you! You have such strength. My AH is out but I haven't talked divorce yet. I understand doing all you can do for the marriage. I have been together with mine for 17 years (married for 10). It doesn't work so well when you are the only one trying. I'm the bad guy too. Good luck Kacee, will be thinking of you.

I glad you are shouting out to the world - here's what I deserve - and going after it :)

Kacee,

So proud of you! We all deserve better than to just wallow as victims of alcoholism forever and ever, waiting for something to change that never will. You've tried so hard.

Prepare yourself for the "Don't leave - I'll change!" argument. It may not come now (he's probably kinda mad, huh?) but for most of us it came eventually. The promises, the commitments to stop, blah blah blah, all that. Think about how you're going to deal with that. Lots of good advice here!

Hugs,
GL

Great job Kacee! You deserve the best for yourself-glad to see that you are going for it! :Val004: