He is just a idiot!

Old 08-26-2007, 05:43 PM
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Location: Milwaukee WI
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He is just a idiot!

Idiot, that is my new favorite term this month. You guys know that my Mom had surgery this past week. Things are not progressing as quickly as we had hoped and she is still in the hospital. My Dad who is almost 80 went for a walk after my Mom's surgery and had a seizure in the parking lot of the hospital while talking with my brother in law (so glad he found him there) come to find out he had a few at other times but never said anything. So he ended up in the ER and we found out he has a brain tumer! It is not a cancerous one, but big enough to cause the seizures. They are not going to do surgery on him right now because of his age so he is on anti-seizure medication and steriods to bring down the brain swelling. So between runnign to the hospital and checking on my Dad and taking care of my own home and kids, it's been a rough week.

My AH left to go out of town on Fri and come home on Sunday. He asked if he should stay home and I told him no. the reason I told him no is that if he had stayed home he would have just been drunk the whole time and my girls didn't need to deal with him. Well....I was leaving my house today to go back to the hospital. I drive down the road and am going past the bar and "surprise, surprise" there his car sits at the bar. I was SO PISSED!

I walk into the bar, "you should have seen his face" because it is something I would never do. He is talking to some older couple and they say Hello...don't know who they are nor do I care. I ask him can I talk with you outside for a minute? Sure, so we walk out and I say "so after being gone for 3 days, this is the first place you go to when you come back home...the bar???????? With all that is going on this is where you come to....he says I was only gone for 2 days and are you done yet?

So, I just walked away. I don't get it, don't understand it, am tired of it breaking my heart. He is not a man, he is not responsible, he is not a responsible father and I am TIRED of being 2nd, 3rd, 4th whichever it is. I have a appt with another attorney Sept 4 I hope this one has more reasonable the mean time I am stashing away as much cash as I can into a account he knows nothing about.
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Old 08-26-2007, 05:46 PM
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I'll say some prayer for you. I hope this new attorney will work out for you.
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Old 08-26-2007, 07:12 PM
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Ya know, I have always wondered why we don't have a national "IDIOT DAY"
This way, they can have their day to be recognized.
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Old 08-27-2007, 10:03 AM
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Acting not reacting
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This made me laugh.
Gosh, I said that alot..good for you on the 2nd attorney consult and for saving cash..
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Old 08-27-2007, 11:14 AM
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Good for you! Keep standing tall!

Stashing is always the greatest idea!

Prayers to you and your girls to get through this!
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Old 08-28-2007, 07:39 AM
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I am so sorry you have so much going on with your parents and having to deal with AH too! My heart is with you. You go girl....Do what you have to. I am behind you 100%. (I am a "money stasher" right now too)
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Old 08-28-2007, 09:29 AM
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Urgh! That's disqusting. I am so sorry; don't even waste your time trying to understand his warped logic and why he does what he does--just keep moving forward and build a good life for your family.
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Old 08-28-2007, 03:19 PM
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thanks for the support you guys, it really helps since I am sure that you guys know that we don't get too much support for A's...cause it is all about them. I am having a very hard time though when he is off from work, his drinking has really escalated over the last couple of weeks...seems to drink pass out, get up and drink is causing me to lose my patience and lash out at him...WHY CAN'T HE JUST SEE what it is doing to everyone else and himself. I don't like myself when I get that way, feels somehow dirty and yucky...but at the same time the frustration level is pretty high right now...I wish I would have a husband that I could depend upon, trust, and lean on in times like these...but I don't. Right now I really just want out of this marriage....I need to keep pushing ahead..
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Old 08-28-2007, 07:33 PM
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and are you done yet?

I've heard this line many times. (and I'm stashing money too.) I know I'll never understand it or get it either. At least know you're not alone. I feel so bad you're going through all this.
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