Who am I?
 

Hi All
This is what ive been asking myself all week "Who am I". Im 41, from a disfunctional family a long string of bad relationships, my only good things are my two beautiful daughters whom i love with all my heart, they are my life. I was 25 when i had my first daughter, before that i cant remember what i used to do, what hobbies i had, SCARY. But all ive done since having the children is look after people. I married a diabetic who couldnt look after himself so i thought i could do that!!!poor man, watched him have hypos (very similar to being drunk) loose his driving licence, couldnt trust him alone with the kids incase he had a hypo!! I divorced this man and thankfully he got better when i left him to it, we are great friends now. Any similarities there to the alcoholic in my life MMmmm,

Back to the question "who am I" I havent a clue!!!!! If someone was to say "what do you want to do today" "umm i dont mind you choose",

Guess what i think I know now who i am thanks to my exhusband and xab I'M CODEPENDANT!!!!

Sorry bout this weird post, i havent seen an adult for 3 days!!!! there is only so much Disney Channel a sane person can watch before going loopy.

the moral to this story is i think is now that i know who and what i am, i can start doing something about it!!!

Got to go Hannah Flaming Montana is on tv.

Mair xxx

Thanks for sharing that, Mair.

My sobriety date is 2/21/05. Since that Monday morning life has been a continual journey of discovering who I am and searching for balance in my life. On Feb. 21st of this year I went to my first CoDA meeting and admitted that I was a codependant also.

I know that I'm a good father and I try my hardest to be an understanding and supportive partner to my GF. Everything else I discover one day at a time, and it's all good.

((Mair)) I'm coming for a visit remember :) I know how you feel, i too don't know who i am anymore other than an enabler who has no one to enable anymore :( It's weird because on vacation i said to a friend that without the everyday drama i feel bored......i know it's nuts! All i know is drama for the past 9 months so i know what you mean about watching the Disney Channel! Just wanted to drop by and say that i'm thinking about you and i'm right there with you :)

Ditto, with the slight change in italics ;)

Mair, I have a little over 10 months, and I still don't who I am either. I have a teenage daiughter (single Dad) so I know all about Hanah Montana. And DeGrassi, and Americas Next Top Model, and.....and......

I know all about Hanah Montana. And DeGrassi, and Americas Next Top Model, and.....and......
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lol problem is she's the only welsh 8 year old i know with an american accent!!!!!!

HBB you are always welcome to visit not so sunny Wales.

Ps the undecisive codie just booked a day trip to Ireland tomorrow!!

Good for you, Mair!!!
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Trish

Mair!!! That's great, have a blast and i'd love to go to Whales, i wasn't able to get there when i went to London twice!! Have a great day and enjoy yourself :)

quoted by hbb
It's weird because on vacation i said to a friend that without the everyday drama i feel bored......i know it's nuts!

Relate to this hbb so much. When my son was severely addicted to drugs, the drama was incredible, the intense and continuous worrying about him nearly destroyed me and everyday I use to ask myself: whats the point in living, why am I going through this, who the hell am I. It wasnt until I cut all ties with him that my life started again. Slowly as I let go of him and let go of all the guilt and blame I felt, I got to know me. All my energy was focussed on him and not me.
In just a few short years I have blossomed and am a totally changed person. I think once I started considering me and doing for me, the more I liked it. I didnt have to feel guilty because I wasnt thinking about someone else all the time. The best lesson I learned was to get to know myself and to always remember this.
Dont worry about what you think people think and dont worry about what people do think about you. Most of the time its not true anyway.
I guess my point is, if you believe in yourself and trust you instincts you will find yourself. Best part, make sure you laugh at least once a day.

Thank you very much Justo, you brightened my day with that :) i am having, like alot of us here i'm sure, a very hard time letting go. My ex is probably just thinking about himself and how he is or isn't going to get better. Like you said, it's all we've known for so long. I did lose myself but it did feel good to do for others. But now i'm struggling with myself....i try to laugh once a day these days though. Thanks for the uplifting story this morning :)

hbb, another thing I remembered... About 5 years ago a fella said to me, if you want something in life, just ask, cos, if you never ask you never get.. (Its easier to sit back and say, oh no, I cant do that, or Oh no, Ill never have money)
I always remember this when that negative girl inside creeps up. You know the overwhelming fear of the unknown.
You can do it hbb, if I did anyone can. Being around positive people and taking information from what they tell you can be a tremendous gift. for example, you know when you are chatting with someone and something clicks and you take that away but you think about it more than twice. Well, thats the info you need to use to your advantage. Not sure if Im making any sense, Its like in the here (the forum) something you read and you think, Gee, thats great advise. Use that advise and the world is your oyster.
Like even, a lady telling me that she went to the markets and they sold great plant pots there. I went but I found an antique clock I was looking for for years.

I love when that happens.

I know how you feel. we have been so INTO someone elses life for so long we dont know who the hell we are. why isnt someone all wraped in my life? (well I am sure we have all had someone, but didnt want them coz they liked us to much!)

i have been meaning to pick up one of those "WHO AM I" books. you know the ones with millions of questions u have to answer about your self.... i am sure it will help to get to know urself again.... :)

thanks Pineapple, im glad im not alone. When you find a good book let me know. lol im just thinking of the millions of dunno's i could answer to the questions. Now if it was a book for my xab i could probably answer all the questions for him!!!!

Mair x

"Life isn't about finding yourself, Life is about creating yourself. -George Bernard Shaw

Walking right beside you Mair.

Jilly

((((((((((((((((Mair)))))))))))))))))))

It is a book that I am sure they sell at one of the big book stores in ur city called All About Me. All it is is a billion questions u have to answer..... it asks about every nitty gritty detail and gets in every knuck and cranny of your life! and all u do is answer the questions.... check this link

its a do-it-yourself autobiography..

http://www.amazon.com/All-About-Me-P...284685-6484853

In this link, you can look INSIDE the book!!!! :)


I think it may help a lot! :)