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-   -   AH is just so clueless (https://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/friends-family-alcoholics/129509-ah-just-so-clueless.html)

respektingme 07-26-2007 03:20 PM

AH is just so clueless
 
I told him I don't want a relationship with his mother. She is coming this weekend. I told him not to include me in their plans. I told him I wasn't going to discuss it anymore. I can't control him or her, so I'm not going to forbid her untimely visit. However, he can not control me either.

Yet today, he asked what activities I would suggest so that we'd all be happy. WHAT??? What a [email protected] I repeated my stance. Then he asked if I would be going to church with them. I said no again. He was astounded! He asked if I'm working my steps. Said, "Wow, I can't believe you won't go to church with us."

As IF I am the devil (his mother actually told my stepdaughters I am a devil) because I don't go with them.

He doesn't care if I go or not. He cares what his mommy thinks. Because some Sundays, I just don't feel like going and he takes the kids. But mommy is coming, and she'll frown. Awwwwww.

She should have just castrated him when she gave birth.

minnie 07-26-2007 03:40 PM

Not clueless*, just hard into his patterning.

You do what is confortable for you and let the chips fall where they may.






*well, possibly. As in unaware.

LGLG07 07-26-2007 03:48 PM

my ah used to do this to me ....

he would always be shocked when I refused to do what he wanted me to do and then stood my ground .

Just like you going to church with them .. if I told ah I wasnt going , he wouldnt have believed me , he would then tell me I WAS going , but I would tell him no again . He wouldnt actually believe me until he got into the car without me and drove away ..

He just was not / is not used to me standing up for myself .. sounds like your ah isnt either ... I say we both keep standing !! LOL


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