Can You Possibly Force Treatment??
 

Is there any possible way that anyone knows of when it comes to an alcoholic who will never possibly go to treatment to force them into it. I mean my father is an alcoholic who is to the point where he passes out on the floor, can't even crawl to bed, urinates on the floor, has fallen countless times outside and inside his house because of the alcohol, etc. I have taken him to the hospital 1-2 times because of alcohol damaging his balance and coordination to the point where he falls down stairs, etc. I offer to drive him to the hospital to be detoxed or offer to find him the best treatment possible and he tells myself and my family it doesn't matter how many times we ask him to get treatment!! He says "you can ask me a million times and I'll never agree to treatment". The point is, the only way he can get help is through treatment because when he goes to AA meetings he stops on the way home at the wine store to stock up. It's getting to the point where I am just going to throw my hands in the air, and say, the hell with it. I still would appreciate any input anyone has on treatment or the law in NC where I live when it comes to somone being a danger to one's self and needing treatment for alcohol. I thank everyone for your time and thanks for any responses, sincerely,

Jeremy

How does he get around?
Is he going to the store and buying his own alcohol?

The best thing we can do for others is educate ourselves about alcohol.
Look over the posts at the top of the forum that say "sticky" beside them and you may want to look into finding some Al Anon meetings in your area. The best help for them is education of us.

I tried everything I could think of to help my boyfriend, but nothing worked. Finally, I threw my hands up in the air and said the hell with it. Once outside my protective veil, his life took a terrible turn for the worse. That's when he realized he needed treatment and sought it himself. He was able to remain sober for roughly 8 months and then relapsed. He died alone in his apartment with a half gallon of rum at his side roughly three weeks ago.

Some alcoholics are able to find a life-long path to recovery. Many, like my boyfriend, are not. It's a terrible, insidious disease. But they won't get help for themselves while we stand in their way.

The best way to help your dad is to walk away. Pray with all your might that he seeks the help he desperately needs and finds a life-long path to recovery and then seek help for yourself via counseling and Alanon.

Believe me when I say I know how painful it is to watch someone you love throw their life away. But you don't have to join him in the downward spiral. Love him, pray for him, and let him go.

In the middle of the day he goes out to the store or wherever and gets alcohol in huge volumes and hides it around the house. It's like there is a never ending supply of booze for him in all the hidden places you could imagine. It's just to the point where no one in my family can do anything without worrying about what's going to happen to him. It's just really saddening to know that we offer help and he is the most stubborn and head strong person that he won't give even an inch when it comes to treatment or help. Thanks,

Jeremy

You can get help for yourself, Jeremy. That's the best course of action for you both. Why not check out an Alanon group in your area? Online forums like this one are very helpful, but you'll get even more support with face-to-face meetings.

No there is no court ordered treatment unless he is arrested. Often we have to learn to detach because it is too painful to witness their demise. Hardest thing you'll ever have to do. But less hard than trying to control it, which you can't, and getting caught up in the insanity of it. Surely family members are careful not to pix up the pieces of his life so that he doesn't feel the consequences.

He has to want to do it for himself if it's to work.

You need to take of you. Do you have any Alanon meetings in your area?

Earthworm

Hi and welcome,Jeremy.
Your Dad sounds very much like my own.We as a family tried everything,to try to get him to change.It never worked.Ya cant force anyone into treatment,that i know off.The more i tried to push my way onto him,the more the situation got worse.I made a bad situation worse,when in my heart what i thought i was doing was trying to help.
We ,as a family,decided to detache with love.We never phyically left Dad.We, didnt have to,although it was really hard to see him this way.Through my own recovery,i was able to let go and let God.Just like any other disease,i was powerless,because Dad was not open minded for any kind of help.
This is how things worked out for us.Doesnt mean that it will be the same for you.Pray and ask what God,s Will is,in this situation.
My prayers are with you ,Dad,and your family.

as to your main question, "NO"

Gee, I thought I was reading an old post of mine. In Australia, you can not force rehab but if you think he is in danger of hurting or killing himself you can call Family Mental Health Services here (must be something similar there) and they will actually meet you at the house and assess them. If they think they are suicidal or in such bad shape as to hurt themselves or their environment they will take them to hospital for further tests and assessment. Here, they wont let them leave the hospital if they think they need help and they will admit them to an appropriate service they need.
Only advise and this was our last alternative some 12 months ago.

I'm sorry about your father Jeremy.

sorry to hear about your situation, jeremy - i have a daughter who is an addict/alcoholic, so i know how difficult it is for you. i go to alanon and get some private counseling - both really help me.

keep posting, k

Sorry to hear about your situation too, Jeremy. I had a father who was an A who is no longer alive-We all walked away and stopped forcing him-after years of trying to guide him with out suffocating him into treatment. He was a Doctor who saved lives and never drank when on duty or on call-it is a shame to go through and watch such a thing from a man who knew the importance of everyone's life but his own.

It took me many years and I'm still on my journey of learning that if I care for myself and stop trying to force someone else to do something they are not willing to do, I'm alot happier in my life because I'm important too.

I know this is painful Jeremy-I have a brother also and an XAB. Both I chose to walk away from as well.

Keep posting and maybe check out an Al-Anon meeting and see if that is right for you!

((((Hugs)))

And to answer your question it is a "NO" IMHO

Thanks to everyone for their opinions and answers, etc. I really appreciate everything. It seems like everyone on here is like family. I'm going to start going to Al-Anon meetings in my area as soon as my schedule permits. Please keep my father in your prayers to help him eventually seek proper guidance for his problem, thanks again, sincerely,

Jeremy

everyone has already said it. The answer is no. But there are things you can do to help until he is ready to find help on his own. Al-anon, stop the rescue missions, and if he is a threat them you can get at least a tempeorary help...but he won't be forced to stay unless he is suicidal or dangerously aggressive. In america you can be as sick as you want to be.