sadness
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: utah
Posts: 42
sadness
Hey all,
Well, I just can't believe I finally went through with the separation. And you know what? I don't regret it one bit. Now that makes me feel that I made the right decision. Like you all say, you'll know when its' time. We're still talking and he keeps asking when we'll get back together, what the chances are, etc, etc. I don't get it. It's like he can relapse and then every thing should be back to normal?? It doesn't work that way anymore. I guess I've become unpredictable to him. I told him I would not tolerate his drinking anymore and I'm not.
My problem now is that I'm really scared for him. He moved to a new state where he doesn't know a soul and I just feel that he's not going to make it. Especially with the separation, he's in this depression and I'm truly afraid for him. I keep telling myself that there's nothing more I can do but man is it hard. The last two nights he hasn't answered his phone. I pretty much know what that means. I feel like I"m preparing myself for the worst. He could decide to end his pain. I wouldn't put it past him. I know he's hurting so much, I can just feel it myself. I just keep praying and praying and praying that he'll make it. I guess I feel bad too because he moved to where he is in order to be closer to me. His thoughts were that if he moved halfway in between his family and mine that would be perfect for us when we get back together. When he took the job there we were discussing our life together someday but he wasn't drinking and hadn't been for 3 months. And then, bam! he's right back to it. I HATE this disease.
thanks for listening.
PN
Well, I just can't believe I finally went through with the separation. And you know what? I don't regret it one bit. Now that makes me feel that I made the right decision. Like you all say, you'll know when its' time. We're still talking and he keeps asking when we'll get back together, what the chances are, etc, etc. I don't get it. It's like he can relapse and then every thing should be back to normal?? It doesn't work that way anymore. I guess I've become unpredictable to him. I told him I would not tolerate his drinking anymore and I'm not.
My problem now is that I'm really scared for him. He moved to a new state where he doesn't know a soul and I just feel that he's not going to make it. Especially with the separation, he's in this depression and I'm truly afraid for him. I keep telling myself that there's nothing more I can do but man is it hard. The last two nights he hasn't answered his phone. I pretty much know what that means. I feel like I"m preparing myself for the worst. He could decide to end his pain. I wouldn't put it past him. I know he's hurting so much, I can just feel it myself. I just keep praying and praying and praying that he'll make it. I guess I feel bad too because he moved to where he is in order to be closer to me. His thoughts were that if he moved halfway in between his family and mine that would be perfect for us when we get back together. When he took the job there we were discussing our life together someday but he wasn't drinking and hadn't been for 3 months. And then, bam! he's right back to it. I HATE this disease.
thanks for listening.
PN
Paused
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Canandaigua.NY
Posts: 21
feels the same pain
Dear Paige
I am a new comer here. but my husband is an alcoholic and Im going through just about the same situationthat you are. one minute hewants a divoorce and the next minute he doesnt. hes be absolutely lost if he was out in this world byhimslef now. but I do so love him so much. weve been through hell and back as they say. im at a loss of what to do at times. I also told him no more drinkng, hes good for about 8 months or so, then the bomb drops. he starts stashing money in different places etc.
I do hope that everything works out for you. Hope that you dont mind me writing. just needed alittle advice
thank you
redrose51
I am a new comer here. but my husband is an alcoholic and Im going through just about the same situationthat you are. one minute hewants a divoorce and the next minute he doesnt. hes be absolutely lost if he was out in this world byhimslef now. but I do so love him so much. weve been through hell and back as they say. im at a loss of what to do at times. I also told him no more drinkng, hes good for about 8 months or so, then the bomb drops. he starts stashing money in different places etc.
I do hope that everything works out for you. Hope that you dont mind me writing. just needed alittle advice
thank you
redrose51
Member
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: georgia
Posts: 531
I just wanted to send out HUGS to both of you!:kisshug: Wish that there was some way to make it easier, but it is a difficult desease even when we are working on ourselves!
My thought and prayers are with y'all!
Constant
My thought and prayers are with y'all!
Constant
Member
Join Date: Nov 2002
Location: Bristol TN/VA
Posts: 12,431
It is so normal to fell sadness...to mourn the loss of hopes and dreams to a dreadful reality....
I hope you will read the stickies at the top of al-anon and nar-anon. There is also a wonderful post in PTSD called surviving significant loss.
And keep coming back, it works if you work it!
I hope you will read the stickies at the top of al-anon and nar-anon. There is also a wonderful post in PTSD called surviving significant loss.
And keep coming back, it works if you work it!
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
