LIFEOUTTHERE

XAH called for the first time in several weeks.

It is father's Day, wants to get the kids for the weekend. I told him that fathers day was not the only day to try and be a father. I told him that the kids could not spend the night with him that I would consider a couple of hours at his mom's or sisters.

I don't want to be mean or cruel, but I have no idea if he is drinking, don't know what he is doing, he has no water heater, no A/C (and we are talking deep south humidity)

Did I do the right thing.

My baby has not seen him in several months, he basically does not know who he is.
My middle child panics when he is mentioned. I just don't know what to do anymore.

Oh yeah and It is still all my fault - imagine that.

dollydo

I think you are making responsible decisions. Keep in mind at all times, you are the voice of your children.

You are a good mom, children first, period end of conversation.

Cynay

Considering this... you were more then generous.... Your job is to protect the children and if this is the effect he has on them...... well

Of course it is.... what would make you think differently?

5Stars

I think you were very fair. You gave him options and if he really wants to see the children he will visit them there. Plus you kill two birds with one stone. They get to see dad AND grandma or auntie.