Sponsor Question
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
Posts: 29
Sponsor Question
I have been on this forum and have gotten more advice than I ever could imagine. I am not ok going to a meeting sitting in front of people. So this works. However, I lose the chance at constant support when I need it. There are a couple of people on this forum for a year or more who always respond always help me. From a sponsor stand point is it absurd to have via forum. I guess that is something you have to have in person. I have such a hard time. I drive to these meeting swell did a year ago when it was crazy. I sit in the parking lot. I cannot do it. I know so many of his friends that are in alanon and aa and do not want that moment. I am fearful of what? i do not know. Just cannot do it so I thought i would throw that question out there. If there is a smilie with a smack in the face feel free to send it if this is an absurd question lol Thanks for your help God Bless!!!!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 3,812
I have seen it happen and I personally have a spiritual advisor that is throught the internet... but sweetie, it is not as effective. What you have in the forms is many online sponsors but there is nothing like the face to face support of a sponsor.
Why not just keep trying to go to those meetings? You will be suprised at the reaction of the people there and the ones that know your ex might be your strongest support....
Why not just keep trying to go to those meetings? You will be suprised at the reaction of the people there and the ones that know your ex might be your strongest support....
So sick of Love songs
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Exactly where my HP intends for me to be!
Posts: 83
What happens in Alanon meetings stays in Al Anon meetings.
There is no gossip or criticism only love for any & all that walk thru those doors.
Al Anon is totally anonymous too..... your best friend could walk into the room and no matter what is said it stays in that room once all parties leave!
I know it is scary for you; it was scary for me too - it was probably scary for most of us!
I would suggest that you try - I am a much happier person now than I ever was with out Al Anon in my life.
And I agree with Cynay
The people that know your ex might be your strongest support.....
Try again
I will be praying for you! You can do this!
There is no gossip or criticism only love for any & all that walk thru those doors.
Al Anon is totally anonymous too..... your best friend could walk into the room and no matter what is said it stays in that room once all parties leave!
I know it is scary for you; it was scary for me too - it was probably scary for most of us!
I would suggest that you try - I am a much happier person now than I ever was with out Al Anon in my life.
And I agree with Cynay
The people that know your ex might be your strongest support.....
Try again
I will be praying for you! You can do this!
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Posts: 261
I am on here.... never say too much. Lurk around a lot. However I do go to Al-anon twice a week.
This forum is the greatest, but I need some skin sometimes too. some real live hugs and faces to go with the stories.
un4gvn acts is absolutely right in my mind in her post above.
Good luck to you
Missy xo
This forum is the greatest, but I need some skin sometimes too. some real live hugs and faces to go with the stories.
un4gvn acts is absolutely right in my mind in her post above.
Good luck to you
Missy xo
came-came to-came to believe
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,116
I sit in the parking lot. I cannot do it.
slowly but surely I am becoming "part of". I see clearly now that "hanging around" for me-weather it's in the parking lot or on the outskirts will keep me sick...
The only way for me to get better is to go "in" and let those that understand best, help me. I shared what I honestly felt when I went back,...when I was called on-I said "I hate this-I don't like this at all" and I have to say that it was the turning point for me. I said it out loud and I got lots of help in return. Lots of people came up to me and said "I totally understand-I felt that same way once too"..
Try going back-let the program-the fellowship-whatever one it is, carry you---
Have a wonderful weekend--Good luck!!
came-came to-came to believe
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: east coast
Posts: 1,116
lol thanks-don't mean to sound stup*d-the on line forum I visited previous to this was 90 percent alkie/addict so I just never even thought of it...I love that it is very diversified here at SR but I got that feeling in my gut when I re-read everything and realized it was the other program and perhaps I shouldn't have responded...
I just don't want to do the wrong thing. Thank you for your response
I just don't want to do the wrong thing. Thank you for your response
Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: England
Posts: 3,410
The "other program", cali? Heck, aren't we all on the same journey?
I will preface what I say by mentioning that I don't go to meetings any more. The whys and wherefores are for another day.
That said, I would not be where I am today without attending face to face meetings. I too felt that I didn't want to sit in front of other people. But what I found was that I wasn't sitting in front of people, I was sitting among them, and they held my hand, literally and figuratively, when I most needed it.
My very first self-help book was "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway". I bought it because I was in a sales job and the phone has started to feel like it weighed 1000lbs. But the messages I learned from that book have carried me far - in fact, they have carried me half way around the world to meet people from SR, some of whom I had never even spoken to before. I would not give up that experience for the world, yet I only gave it to myself because I decided to act in spite of my fears.
No-one goes to meetings because they are perfect. As is said in the preamble "The welcome we give you may not show the warmth we have in our hearts for you, but the warmth is there and you will soon start to feel it" See? I wrote that from memory and I haven't been to a meeting since last August. It was such a comfort to know that was the truth.
What have you got to lose by giving a meeting a go?
I will preface what I say by mentioning that I don't go to meetings any more. The whys and wherefores are for another day.
That said, I would not be where I am today without attending face to face meetings. I too felt that I didn't want to sit in front of other people. But what I found was that I wasn't sitting in front of people, I was sitting among them, and they held my hand, literally and figuratively, when I most needed it.
My very first self-help book was "Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway". I bought it because I was in a sales job and the phone has started to feel like it weighed 1000lbs. But the messages I learned from that book have carried me far - in fact, they have carried me half way around the world to meet people from SR, some of whom I had never even spoken to before. I would not give up that experience for the world, yet I only gave it to myself because I decided to act in spite of my fears.
No-one goes to meetings because they are perfect. As is said in the preamble "The welcome we give you may not show the warmth we have in our hearts for you, but the warmth is there and you will soon start to feel it" See? I wrote that from memory and I haven't been to a meeting since last August. It was such a comfort to know that was the truth.
What have you got to lose by giving a meeting a go?
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