The gut feeling never fails......
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
The gut feeling never fails......
Well all I have to say is my gut feeling is never wrong. And why is it when things seem to be going so well, it's back to "screw up" time.
Just a few weekends ago the hubby told me he was never going to drink again. I responded good, you really shouldn't and I honestly don't think he has had a drink since October, maybe November, I really don't know. I know when he broke his ankle in December he couldn't get out to get the drink. You have to know though he isn't working a program or anything so his comments sometimes just don't hold true. And when he said this I was hoping that this was it. The big time sobriety.
Well anyway, he calls me today and he sounds funny. The kind of funny I recognize in his voice that maybe I think only I can hear when he's been drinking. I just ask if he's okay and he says his sinuses are bothering him. I say okay and drop it.
So I come home and the front door is locked, the screen door that doesn't have a key and I shout in but no one answers so I come in the house through the basement. Low and behold he is passed out with a drink next him and $350 sitting on the dresser. We are supposed to be broke. I am robbing Peter to pay Paul.
Well, here I am. I picked up the money but I am not sure if I should put it back. I could pay a couple bills with it but I don't know if I should. Any thoughts?
I guess I am pretty proud of myself for not waking him up and screaming and what ever else I used to do. I hear him moving around in there now. I am powerless, I am calm. Maybe I will just go out and avoid the whole situation.
Oh well, thanks for letting me share and I'd love to hear some thoughts on the money thing (that much money seems like coke money to me).
Hugs,
Debbie
Just a few weekends ago the hubby told me he was never going to drink again. I responded good, you really shouldn't and I honestly don't think he has had a drink since October, maybe November, I really don't know. I know when he broke his ankle in December he couldn't get out to get the drink. You have to know though he isn't working a program or anything so his comments sometimes just don't hold true. And when he said this I was hoping that this was it. The big time sobriety.
Well anyway, he calls me today and he sounds funny. The kind of funny I recognize in his voice that maybe I think only I can hear when he's been drinking. I just ask if he's okay and he says his sinuses are bothering him. I say okay and drop it.
So I come home and the front door is locked, the screen door that doesn't have a key and I shout in but no one answers so I come in the house through the basement. Low and behold he is passed out with a drink next him and $350 sitting on the dresser. We are supposed to be broke. I am robbing Peter to pay Paul.
Well, here I am. I picked up the money but I am not sure if I should put it back. I could pay a couple bills with it but I don't know if I should. Any thoughts?
I guess I am pretty proud of myself for not waking him up and screaming and what ever else I used to do. I hear him moving around in there now. I am powerless, I am calm. Maybe I will just go out and avoid the whole situation.
Oh well, thanks for letting me share and I'd love to hear some thoughts on the money thing (that much money seems like coke money to me).
Hugs,
Debbie
Member
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: North Vancouver, British Columbia
Posts: 1,714
(((((Barbiedeb))))) $*%#! I'm so sorry to hear this. Give yourself a big pat on the back for not reacting as you have in the past - well done! You must be so let down and frustrated, though. That good ol' gut feeling - we have talked about that so much and it rarely fails us. So much of the time I don't listen to it as I don't WANT my suspicions to be true.
As for the money - well, I'd like to think that I'd grab it while the going was good and be able to say, "What money was that, hon? We're broke aren't we?"
Sending lots of hugs and support your way. Hope you can salvage the rest of the day.
Thinking of you!
As for the money - well, I'd like to think that I'd grab it while the going was good and be able to say, "What money was that, hon? We're broke aren't we?"
Sending lots of hugs and support your way. Hope you can salvage the rest of the day.
Thinking of you!
Southern through and through
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In.....trouble :-)
Posts: 1,453
Barbiedeb,
Wish I were a veteran Al Anoner here. Then I could give both YOU and me the right answers.
My first gut reaction was to say 'take the money and run' especially if you are robbing Peter to pay Paul. But I guess since he was stirring at the end of your post, the opportunity to take it has already passed and that probably wasn't the thing to do anyway....well, maybe not unless you discussed it. But I WOULD SURELY bring it up, the fact that he has $350 and you are scrambling to pay the bills!
But the mention of the 'gut' always being right is what really got my attention with you post. I swear, Barbiedeb, don't you just hate that gut sometimes because you know it's telling you something you don't want to hear? My gut is 99.9999999% right and usually it is bringing me news I don't want. My gut has been screaming at me lately about my daughter. Just makes me sick.
You up for a 'gutectomy?' Maybe I can get us a 2 for 1 deal!
Hang in there, Barbiedeb. Ain't life fun? ARGGGGGGGGGGH!
Hugs,
Hangin' In
Wish I were a veteran Al Anoner here. Then I could give both YOU and me the right answers.
My first gut reaction was to say 'take the money and run' especially if you are robbing Peter to pay Paul. But I guess since he was stirring at the end of your post, the opportunity to take it has already passed and that probably wasn't the thing to do anyway....well, maybe not unless you discussed it. But I WOULD SURELY bring it up, the fact that he has $350 and you are scrambling to pay the bills!
But the mention of the 'gut' always being right is what really got my attention with you post. I swear, Barbiedeb, don't you just hate that gut sometimes because you know it's telling you something you don't want to hear? My gut is 99.9999999% right and usually it is bringing me news I don't want. My gut has been screaming at me lately about my daughter. Just makes me sick.
You up for a 'gutectomy?' Maybe I can get us a 2 for 1 deal!
Hang in there, Barbiedeb. Ain't life fun? ARGGGGGGGGGGH!
Hugs,
Hangin' In
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
I'm sorry you have been disappointed
again. How frustrating for you. As for the money, probably the honest thing would be to confront him about it. I didn't say that is what I would do, I said that is probably the honest thing. I am evil and I would be tempted to take it and disavow any knowledge of it, just to mess with his drunken head.
Hugs to you barbiedeb.
Peace,
Gabe
Hugs to you barbiedeb.
Peace,
Gabe
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Hi all
Thanks! You guys always make me feel better and laugh
He stirred but didn't get up. Hmmm, did I ever mention I have a little evil (well maybe a lot) in me. I have the money. I am not going to do anything with it just yet. Lets wait and see what he says. Like you said, if we aren't supposed to have any money, how can he ask about it.
I wonder if he will know that I know he was drinking. I really think he thinks I am stupid when it comes to that. I think in the beginning I used to tell myself he was just goofy, maybe justifying it so I didn't have to believe it. But heck, you live with it long enough you know. I smelt it from the front door.
And yes I sure do hate it when my gut tells me something. I will go for that gutectomy Hangin'. Maybe if we all go we can get a real cheap rate even better than 2 for 1......
Actually I can't believe how fine I am. I do not plan on letting him ruin my evening. I am going to watch a little TV (I was going to go out but its raining) and have a snack. Now not sure what I want to do when its time to go to bed. Who wants to get in bed with that smell all around.
Anyway, thanks again for all the hugs and support. I suppose I will give an update if there is one.
Hugs right back to all of you ********{Group}}}}
Thanks again,
Debbie
Thanks! You guys always make me feel better and laugh
He stirred but didn't get up. Hmmm, did I ever mention I have a little evil (well maybe a lot) in me. I have the money. I am not going to do anything with it just yet. Lets wait and see what he says. Like you said, if we aren't supposed to have any money, how can he ask about it. I wonder if he will know that I know he was drinking. I really think he thinks I am stupid when it comes to that. I think in the beginning I used to tell myself he was just goofy, maybe justifying it so I didn't have to believe it. But heck, you live with it long enough you know. I smelt it from the front door.
And yes I sure do hate it when my gut tells me something. I will go for that gutectomy Hangin'. Maybe if we all go we can get a real cheap rate even better than 2 for 1......
Actually I can't believe how fine I am. I do not plan on letting him ruin my evening. I am going to watch a little TV (I was going to go out but its raining) and have a snack. Now not sure what I want to do when its time to go to bed. Who wants to get in bed with that smell all around.
Anyway, thanks again for all the hugs and support. I suppose I will give an update if there is one.
Hugs right back to all of you ********{Group}}}}
Thanks again,
Debbie
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Kids, don't get those gutectomies
Your gut/instinct is what protects you. Maybe you don't like it when it's right (as in the A drinking again) but you need those gut feelings for survival. Call it your "gut feeling"...call it your instinct...I call it the voice of my best self.
Barbiedeb, I am sending you a cyber hot fudge sundae, heavy on the fudge and whipped cream. You enjoy your evening. I am wearing my tiara in your honor tonight.
Peace,
Gabe
Barbiedeb, I am sending you a cyber hot fudge sundae, heavy on the fudge and whipped cream. You enjoy your evening. I am wearing my tiara in your honor tonight.
Peace,
Gabe
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Hey Gabe
Okay I won't get the gutectomy, it is helpful and I know that deep down. Oh and that sundae sounds quite yummy and thanks for wearing the tiara in my honor. I always thought of myself as a princess or queen in another life, maybe I should get a tiara. I have my neices here from when she was staying here. Maybe I should put it on
MG,
I actually laughed out loud and covered my mouth when I read your post. Too funny. The lawnmower is safe, I saw it when I had to come in the house through the basement.
I was hoping this would be the time too but I guess its not. I only know that I am going to get through it and take care me. And I hope he gets back on track, maybe a bad hangover will set him straight!
I certainly don't look forward to our next conversation because I am not sure what I will say. I do know I am going to be calm.
I love you guys too!!
Hugs,
Debbie
Okay I won't get the gutectomy, it is helpful and I know that deep down. Oh and that sundae sounds quite yummy and thanks for wearing the tiara in my honor. I always thought of myself as a princess or queen in another life, maybe I should get a tiara. I have my neices here from when she was staying here. Maybe I should put it on
MG,
I actually laughed out loud and covered my mouth when I read your post. Too funny. The lawnmower is safe, I saw it when I had to come in the house through the basement.
I was hoping this would be the time too but I guess its not. I only know that I am going to get through it and take care me. And I hope he gets back on track, maybe a bad hangover will set him straight!
I certainly don't look forward to our next conversation because I am not sure what I will say. I do know I am going to be calm.
I love you guys too!!
Hugs,
Debbie
Member
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: California
Posts: 329
Hi barbiedeb,
Good move!! I am so glad that you have the money now. If you need to pay bills, then go for it! That is alot of money to have just lying around. I am so broke that it seems like ALOT to me. I have to rob Mary to pay Peter and Paul.
It amazes me how much our GUT feelings know. Even though the outcomes are not always good news I agree with Gabe. We need those gut feelings for sure!!
Take care,
matters
Good move!! I am so glad that you have the money now. If you need to pay bills, then go for it! That is alot of money to have just lying around. I am so broke that it seems like ALOT to me. I have to rob Mary to pay Peter and Paul.
It amazes me how much our GUT feelings know. Even though the outcomes are not always good news I agree with Gabe. We need those gut feelings for sure!!
Take care,
matters
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Barbiedeb
My husband doesn't drink today, but years ago he did his share. True confession time - when he came home drunk, I would lighten his pockets and put the money in the Bible, to use for a worthy occassion someday. Somehow hiding it in the Bible relieved my guilt.
Well, when it got up over $1500, I booked us both on a trip to Vegas, LOL. It took me years before I finally confessed to him, and it was around the same time as he quit drinking.
I know that you must be disappointed, but at least he has been trying, and that alone is success. My guess is that he will try again.
Sending huge hugs and I'd send a Bible but I'll bet you already have one.
My husband doesn't drink today, but years ago he did his share. True confession time - when he came home drunk, I would lighten his pockets and put the money in the Bible, to use for a worthy occassion someday. Somehow hiding it in the Bible relieved my guilt.
Well, when it got up over $1500, I booked us both on a trip to Vegas, LOL. It took me years before I finally confessed to him, and it was around the same time as he quit drinking.
I know that you must be disappointed, but at least he has been trying, and that alone is success. My guess is that he will try again.
Sending huge hugs and I'd send a Bible but I'll bet you already have one.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Barbiedeb
Get the tiara. And not the leftover kiddie one. Get yourself a "gen-U-ine" tiara with lots of sparkly things on it. You won't believe how good it feels to wear it. And you are mistaken, you were not a Queen in some other life, you are a Queen in this one. Speak to the Queen within and she will guide you.
Peace,
Gabe
Peace,
Gabe
Southern through and through
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: In.....trouble :-)
Posts: 1,453
Well heck, Gabe, you've messed up my idea of the 2 for 1 gutectomy now. Sure we need our guts, but after a month like this one, I'd like to do without mine for a while. So now since BarbieDeb has bailed on me, I guess there goes my gutectomy. And darn it, I was going to ask them to take this pot belly along with the gut!...
So if the pot belly stays, the least I can do is feed it. Uh, where is that cyber hot fudge sundae complete with heavy fudge and extra whip cream?...
And BarbieDeb, here's the deal. If you split the money with me, I promise he'll never know where it went.
So if the pot belly stays, the least I can do is feed it. Uh, where is that cyber hot fudge sundae complete with heavy fudge and extra whip cream?...
And BarbieDeb, here's the deal. If you split the money with me, I promise he'll never know where it went.
Grace Under Fire
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Another world
Posts: 536
Deb,
He has done really well, I hope this is
a reminder of what he hasn't been missing.
And maybe he will get right back up on that
horse.
You're doing great!
(M.G., you crack me up)
Hugs to you Deb,
He has done really well, I hope this is
a reminder of what he hasn't been missing.
And maybe he will get right back up on that
horse.
You're doing great!
(M.G., you crack me up)
Hugs to you Deb,
I used to work here ;)
Thread Starter
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: I live in Trevose, PA & collect Barbies :)
Posts: 2,024
Good Morning everyone
Well I certainly had a good nights sleep. Who would have thought it?
When I got up he was awake and these are his words, "What was I thinking, I am a real a**hole." Well, I am not a morning person so I just kind of "grunted". He knows, and he knows I know. So hopefully he steps back up on the wagon again.
He hasn't said a word about the money but of course he probably doesn't realize it was sitting out in plain site, that much money probably has a hiding spot. Should be interesting when he realizes it isn't there.
Matters, that gut feeling, boy it sure does know. I hate it but know we need it.
Ann, I like your idea about saving it for a special occasion but the thought of paying bills makes me even happier.....lol
And Gabe where would one find a sparkling tiara that doesn't cost a million dollars? I really kept thinking about what you said, "...you are a Queen in this one. Speak to the Queen within and she will guide you." What a wonderful way to think!! I really like it.
Hangin', since we aren't getting the gutectomies, I think it would only be fair that we should have those hot fudge sundaes, don't you
Josie, thanks I hope he gets back up too. And MG is too funny isn't she? She always says the right thing to make me laugh
Well folks, I need to get ready for work. I just wanted to thank you all again for your words of support and encouragement.
I hope you all have a great day!!
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
Well I certainly had a good nights sleep. Who would have thought it?
When I got up he was awake and these are his words, "What was I thinking, I am a real a**hole." Well, I am not a morning person so I just kind of "grunted". He knows, and he knows I know. So hopefully he steps back up on the wagon again.
He hasn't said a word about the money but of course he probably doesn't realize it was sitting out in plain site, that much money probably has a hiding spot. Should be interesting when he realizes it isn't there.
Matters, that gut feeling, boy it sure does know. I hate it but know we need it.
Ann, I like your idea about saving it for a special occasion but the thought of paying bills makes me even happier.....lol
And Gabe where would one find a sparkling tiara that doesn't cost a million dollars? I really kept thinking about what you said, "...you are a Queen in this one. Speak to the Queen within and she will guide you." What a wonderful way to think!! I really like it.
Hangin', since we aren't getting the gutectomies, I think it would only be fair that we should have those hot fudge sundaes, don't you
Josie, thanks I hope he gets back up too. And MG is too funny isn't she? She always says the right thing to make me laugh
Well folks, I need to get ready for work. I just wanted to thank you all again for your words of support and encouragement.
I hope you all have a great day!!
Many hugs.
Love,
Debbie
It is what it is!!!
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Sobriety
Posts: 5,767
I am late, as usual, just wanted to send hugs to you.
I love you!! You handled it great, and the money, do with it what makes you comfortable. If paying bills relieves some stress, do it!!!
I love you!! You handled it great, and the money, do with it what makes you comfortable. If paying bills relieves some stress, do it!!!
believer
Join Date: Aug 2002
Location: walking in faith
Posts: 1,023
I'm sorry for your husbands slip Deb, but you are handling it like a champ!
By all means pay some bills - that way if hubby finds out you have the money, he certainly can't get upset about you using it for a good cause.....
(But if you can, save a few dollars to buy something nice for yourself.....)
Hugs,
JG
By all means pay some bills - that way if hubby finds out you have the money, he certainly can't get upset about you using it for a good cause.....
(But if you can, save a few dollars to buy something nice for yourself.....
)Hugs,
JG
Member
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: That's what I'd like to know.
Posts: 2,416
LOL
This reminds me of "Let's Make a Deal"!
Hey Deb... door number one? Cutain number two? The box? The whole crowd is screaming "Take the money!!!!!!" I cheated and looked behind the curtain. There's a duck pulling a little red wagon full of skillits. The door opens onto a window and the box belonged to Houdini and I think he's the only one who knows the way out.
Take the money!!!!
Big hugs!
Smoke
This reminds me of "Let's Make a Deal"!
Hey Deb... door number one? Cutain number two? The box? The whole crowd is screaming "Take the money!!!!!!" I cheated and looked behind the curtain. There's a duck pulling a little red wagon full of skillits. The door opens onto a window and the box belonged to Houdini and I think he's the only one who knows the way out.
Take the money!!!!
Big hugs!
Smoke
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