Am I overreating?
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Lake Luzerne
Posts: 1,786
I understand full well what you are talking about with him being a policeman. I also know how this often turns out. Your daughter will defend herself if this happens again, or you will have to intervene to help her. Someone is more likely to be hurt worse by waiting.
I know when my ex hit me for the last time, something rose up inside me and I knew I could kill him. One of us wouldn't get up but I knew he wouldn't hit me again without me fighting back. This type of abuse gets worse, he is being satisfied and empowered intimidating her, he can sense her fear, her compliance to his will. It's dangerous.
I know when my ex hit me for the last time, something rose up inside me and I knew I could kill him. One of us wouldn't get up but I knew he wouldn't hit me again without me fighting back. This type of abuse gets worse, he is being satisfied and empowered intimidating her, he can sense her fear, her compliance to his will. It's dangerous.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Milwaukee WI
Posts: 137
thank you all for your thoughts and input, I am not ignoring, but I do need to have a plan...I am trying to figure that out now. I have called the DV line and they had very good input...also meeting with my Pastor. I know what you all are saying....it scares me too and I KNOW that I need to act now. I will keep you guys posted. thanks...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Milwaukee WI
Posts: 137
"This type of abuse gets worse, he is being satisfied and empowered intimidating her, he can sense her fear, her compliance to his will. It's dangerous."
Mallow, this post you wrote really struck home...I think this is exactly what's going on. Yes, I love my daughter very much and it is my job to protect her...but you guys also know how decieving and convincing a alcoholic can be...it gets to the point where you question everything you do...because they have told you that "you" are the one who is off kilter...not them. that is why I posted this message here...to verify what I was already thinking...it certainly is not that I do not care or love my daughter enough...Thanks...
Mallow, this post you wrote really struck home...I think this is exactly what's going on. Yes, I love my daughter very much and it is my job to protect her...but you guys also know how decieving and convincing a alcoholic can be...it gets to the point where you question everything you do...because they have told you that "you" are the one who is off kilter...not them. that is why I posted this message here...to verify what I was already thinking...it certainly is not that I do not care or love my daughter enough...Thanks...
Member
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,351
yes please keep us updated!!! Just because he is a policeman big deal--they have problems to--nice to know he is running around with a loaded gun--maybe he needs a little ''employee assistance'' before he hurts someone.
There is no NO reason for a FATHER to EVER touch his daughter...be safe.
There is no NO reason for a FATHER to EVER touch his daughter...be safe.
Last edited by Sunflower; 03-19-2007 at 12:47 PM. Reason: spelling
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Lake Luzerne
Posts: 1,786
In retrospect, I can remember seeing the power my ex got from being abusive. He became exilerated in his own sick mind in knowing he could instill fear in us.
I was so afraid of him, I have to admit that I have no recollection of my youngest sons infancy. I make up stories to tell him. My ex handed me a loaded gun and told me to do the world a favor. He kept yelling in my face that I should just do it, just get iot over with. Look at myself! Who could love me, who would want me!!!!!!!
I remember being blinded from eyes cried shut. I know that I know that I know, I stood on the line between death and life. Abuse starts with mind control. It goes to isolation. Pretty soon he has a captive audience so all that you hear is what he says, there are no other voices in your life. He humiliates your friends and family away.
It doesn't matter if you leave with the clothes on your back. Be safe. Have a plan.
I don't know if being a cop drives people crazy or crazy people become cops.
I do know that authority can be a real stimuli to a person who feels inadequate.
I mean really, what caliber of man gets off making a young girl quiver with fear?
He's a sick man.
I was so afraid of him, I have to admit that I have no recollection of my youngest sons infancy. I make up stories to tell him. My ex handed me a loaded gun and told me to do the world a favor. He kept yelling in my face that I should just do it, just get iot over with. Look at myself! Who could love me, who would want me!!!!!!!
I remember being blinded from eyes cried shut. I know that I know that I know, I stood on the line between death and life. Abuse starts with mind control. It goes to isolation. Pretty soon he has a captive audience so all that you hear is what he says, there are no other voices in your life. He humiliates your friends and family away.
It doesn't matter if you leave with the clothes on your back. Be safe. Have a plan.
I don't know if being a cop drives people crazy or crazy people become cops.
I do know that authority can be a real stimuli to a person who feels inadequate.
I mean really, what caliber of man gets off making a young girl quiver with fear?
He's a sick man.
Forum Leader
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: trail of discovery
Posts: 2,472
Please keep us updated...I just read this thread and wow, yeah, I would be concerned...... alot ! That is just not ok behavior from any one let alone a parent. It is abusive, as you have already assessed... I just wanted to validate you feelings on this point.
She only 8 now and he's doing that... I'd hate to see what would happen in her teen years, which will be a nightmare, if he doesn't stop that kind of treatment of her.
Praying for your situation and family
She only 8 now and he's doing that... I'd hate to see what would happen in her teen years, which will be a nightmare, if he doesn't stop that kind of treatment of her.
Praying for your situation and family
Wipe your paws elsewhere!
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,672
I agree with the others here. The faster you remove him from your home and life the better. Domestic violence excalates. This is not the end, it's just the beginning. There's no telling how far he will take this. It's time to put an end to it now.
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: small town, USA
Posts: 50
SS, I'm thinking about you, too. Please be safe first. Second, remember that you are teaching your daughter how to let a man (or anyone) treat her. We all want more for our kids than this crap.
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