told ya I was crazy
told ya I was crazy
Thanks alot for all you kind replies about me being so sensitive and thinking I have offended someone here just because I read an uncomfortable posts...
I see I still have a lot of work to do with my own emotional issues and scars. I tend to think they are gone but they are still very raw as you can tell.
I always tend to think that I am the one who has done something wrong.That maybe what I have to share is wrong in someway.
I am angry--soooo Angry--at the the stuff thats happened to me in this life--and when I read some of your post I hurt for you and I get angry that YOU have to go through the things you do--so I let it all out-maybe that is wrong--I have always been a tell it like I see it kindof person.This doesn't make me number one on the best friend list I am sure.
I mean the best --know that--all my life has been helping others- it defines me-which is probably why I am a nurse.
After all I have been through--and how strong I have always had to be-to survive-I thought I had finally reached a point in my life where I could relax----then I get sick with some freaky disease--and POOF its all gone-everything--and with it comes the AS...I hurt inside more than I ever imagined.
I try and say I am all together and really most of the time now I am--but I wonder if I am just trying to convince myself.
I am a work in progress still it seems...I will talk to my counsellor about this---good it came to the surface....
I see I still have a lot of work to do with my own emotional issues and scars. I tend to think they are gone but they are still very raw as you can tell.
I always tend to think that I am the one who has done something wrong.That maybe what I have to share is wrong in someway.
I am angry--soooo Angry--at the the stuff thats happened to me in this life--and when I read some of your post I hurt for you and I get angry that YOU have to go through the things you do--so I let it all out-maybe that is wrong--I have always been a tell it like I see it kindof person.This doesn't make me number one on the best friend list I am sure.
I mean the best --know that--all my life has been helping others- it defines me-which is probably why I am a nurse.
After all I have been through--and how strong I have always had to be-to survive-I thought I had finally reached a point in my life where I could relax----then I get sick with some freaky disease--and POOF its all gone-everything--and with it comes the AS...I hurt inside more than I ever imagined.
I try and say I am all together and really most of the time now I am--but I wonder if I am just trying to convince myself.
I am a work in progress still it seems...I will talk to my counsellor about this---good it came to the surface....
Maybe I'm splitting hairs but isn't there a difference between being MADE "crazy" and actually BEING "crazy"? I feel decidedly less crazy now that I've moved out of my ex's house, and my natural nuttiness is returning.
Hmm. I'm confusing myself now. :-)
Hmm. I'm confusing myself now. :-)
i'm really angry too... at myself, at my A, and at life for dealing me this hand. i know it's something i (nor anyone else here) deserves to deal with, and i'm so sorry for everyone who posts and/or reads here, as it means we have all been put in the same wobbling, unsturdy boat. i think that would make anyone a bit crazy
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: southern indiana
Posts: 2,145
ahhhhhhh.....but the great part is......WE ARE GETTING BETTER!!!!
and living with the crap that we chose to live with, well, during recovery, we learn why we did that, and we get better, and once again the durn alcoholic is a hero for showing us how to get well. damn, i hate when that happens.
i feel nutty, oh so nutty, so nutty, and nuttty and nuttttyyyyyyyy.
but at least i don't feel sick anymore. yeeeeeee--hawwwwww
and living with the crap that we chose to live with, well, during recovery, we learn why we did that, and we get better, and once again the durn alcoholic is a hero for showing us how to get well. damn, i hate when that happens.
i feel nutty, oh so nutty, so nutty, and nuttty and nuttttyyyyyyyy.
but at least i don't feel sick anymore. yeeeeeee--hawwwwww
I didn't think we were nuts waiting to be cracked....I thought we came here cracked...kinda like humpty dumpty...hoping to be put back together again.
Okay, maybe I'm the cracked egg and ya'll are the kings court showing me how to put my life back in order!
Something like that?!??!?!?!
Okay, maybe I'm the cracked egg and ya'll are the kings court showing me how to put my life back in order!
Something like that?!??!?!?!
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