Eating and nutrition... am I "allowed"?

Old 02-21-2007, 07:16 AM
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Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Dixie
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Eating and nutrition... am I "allowed"?

Is it okay for me to encourage (sometimes insist) that my recovering AH eat something? He doesn't eat. And his schedule right now is so busy that he has little time to give eating much thought. He leaves the house at 7:00 a.m. to go to work, leaves work and goes straight to treatment and doesn't get home again until almost 10:00 p.m. This is not a new problem... he has always been like this... although, it did get much worse as the disease progressed.

This is where I get confused about how we are supposed to view alcoholism. The professionals keep using diabetes and cancer as analogies to help us better understand the illness. If my AH had either of these two diseases, it would be perfectly acceptable and expected that I would practically force feed him, if necessary.

What should I do?
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Old 02-21-2007, 07:35 AM
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Location: South Shore MA
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Remove the alcoholism from the picture...What would you do if he was just on a busy schedule?
Do you cook?
On my wife's busy days, I will make a lunch for her and if I am awake early enough, I will make her a breakfast and coffee. I cook dinner as well.
When she says she is tired and not hungry, I will cook something light and offer it anyway. With food in front of her and no effort used by her to gather it, she will eat. Between spouses, we all should look after one another. Her schedule vs mine... I see it as my place to take on the meals as needed.
All we can do... make things available.
Bring a horse to water but we can't make them drink.
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Old 02-21-2007, 07:44 AM
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I think you answer it in your first sentence - encouragement, not insistence.

Take care.
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Old 02-21-2007, 09:11 AM
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Best... you're a man AND you cook? Be still my heart.

Thanks for your input.
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Old 02-21-2007, 09:35 AM
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I am in exactly the same dilemna as you - except for the treatment after work thing (we're just on day 4 of detox right now - so far so good). I was wondering to myself this morning if I push on taking him to a noon meeting - he hasn't been to one in over a week. I think yesterday my husband ate 8 big crackers with cheese on them and a salad. The fantastic news, to me, is that he made the salad all by himself (I wasn't even home) and chose it because they told him to eat leafy greens - Healthy, self-caring choices all on his own!!!! He also took his vitamins of his own accord!

I thought the same thing - he's too physically ill right now to make all his own food, so I've been making and offering. Soon he'll be stronger and then I'll taper off.

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