trying to back off
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2002
Location: Sask.
Posts: 64
trying to back off
My "A" reached out for help about 2 weeks ago, someone from AA came over and they talked for about 3 hours. I know this helped him, I didn't ask what was said or anything like that but since that day I can't help but ask what are you going to do next? He hasn't done anything else. The guy that came over called a few times to see if he wanted to go to a meeting and finally gave up I think. My A says he still plans on going and reading this or that, etc etc. Just a matter of tiime before he starts to drink again I'm sure. I hate to even get my hopes up anymore. I was also wondering if anyone who's been in alanon for awhile let go of old friends? Alot of my friends were selfish and one is an alcoholic. Since my recovery I no longer keep in touch with these friends because I have no desire too but now I feel like I have no friends! I guess I'm on the pity pot today.
Summer
I know that I was neglectful of friendships for a long time, but I also learned to be more selective . Some of my "friends" were never supportive during the tough times, and others are like sisters and always there for me. I also made new friends, a couple of my good friends today are women I met at my meeting.
And I learned to be happy at times I was alone. Those times are now peaceful for me.
I'm sending hugs, and encouraging you to get out to places where you can meet great people and new friends. You sound like a great person to me, they just need to meet you.
I know that I was neglectful of friendships for a long time, but I also learned to be more selective . Some of my "friends" were never supportive during the tough times, and others are like sisters and always there for me. I also made new friends, a couple of my good friends today are women I met at my meeting.
And I learned to be happy at times I was alone. Those times are now peaceful for me.
I'm sending hugs, and encouraging you to get out to places where you can meet great people and new friends. You sound like a great person to me, they just need to meet you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Posts: 4,955
Hi Summer,
Due to my codie tendencies, a lot of my "former" friends used to be what I call "friends of convenience". Meaning that my friendships with these people were based on what I could do for them. I noticed that when I started to become stronger in myself, these people suddenly weren't around anymore. I think that sometimes when we make changes in our lives our friends are uncomfortable with that. It disrupts some kind of status quo that exists. I have found that people who truly love you and are truly there for you, stick by you no matter what. These people are the gems in life.
Peace,
Gabe
Peace,
Gabe
Good friends are priceless. I've had so called friends in the past who ran a mile when they learned about my situation. I am hoping to make new friends here and I am making new friends in my home group.
For years I have been too busy concentrating on my two grown up childrens alcohol and drug problems, My ex-partner was an violent alcoholic who I was with for five years and my current partner needs morphine tablets (prescribed) 4 times a day to get through his day and has been taking these for years.
Sorry if I sound negative, (does anybody know if morphine are addictive)
I am making a fresh start for myself and learning to let go.
Love you all, Thankyou all for your honesty and for giving me hope for better days.
Love and hugs
Julie.
For years I have been too busy concentrating on my two grown up childrens alcohol and drug problems, My ex-partner was an violent alcoholic who I was with for five years and my current partner needs morphine tablets (prescribed) 4 times a day to get through his day and has been taking these for years.
Sorry if I sound negative, (does anybody know if morphine are addictive)
I am making a fresh start for myself and learning to let go.
Love you all, Thankyou all for your honesty and for giving me hope for better days.
Love and hugs
Julie.
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