He called
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 782
He called
I have not spoken to AH in well over a month. I have a new phone number, and I avoid his calls at work. Well yesterday he called my new cell. I have NO CLUE how he got my number. Then today, I am out of the office, and he called my co-worker. She knows the deal, and she was nice to talk to him, but he talked to her for an hour and a half!! That is ridiculous! He told her that he couldn't believe I gave up on him, and that 3 counselors have said he is not an A, but is an abuser. I feel weird that he called her, but she did not care. I don't know why I am posting...I just feel weird, bothered.
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Keepin' my side of the litterbox clean
Posts: 2,136
So he isn't an A according the THREE counselors. That's what he says, so who's to say there's any truth to that? Plus, counselors are human beings, not mind readers. He could have told them anything in order for them to believe he is not an A. BUT HE IS AN ABUSER. Gee, that makes him one heckuva great guy!
Why did your coworker waste her time letting him blab on that long? I realize this is a slow time of year at work, but if I'd ever been on my office phone for that period of time, my boss would have had something to say about it. A simple, "Somebody just came in my office and I have to go," would have sufficed to get him off the phone.
Change your cell phone number again, if need be. Somebody who has your cell number must have tipped him off.
Yes, he is an abuser and he's showing that right now by HARRASSING you and your co-workers. I'd suggest to your coworker that she refrain from taking his calls, or cutting them short if he tries to rope her into another marathon discussion.
Why did your coworker waste her time letting him blab on that long? I realize this is a slow time of year at work, but if I'd ever been on my office phone for that period of time, my boss would have had something to say about it. A simple, "Somebody just came in my office and I have to go," would have sufficed to get him off the phone.
Change your cell phone number again, if need be. Somebody who has your cell number must have tipped him off.
Yes, he is an abuser and he's showing that right now by HARRASSING you and your co-workers. I'd suggest to your coworker that she refrain from taking his calls, or cutting them short if he tries to rope her into another marathon discussion.
Member
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: southern indiana
Posts: 2,145
we expect this from the "A".......what in the hell were your co-workers intentions???? with friends like that......
i know you can't control what she does, and obviously, she can't either.
intentions.....i would question.
love to you
jeri
i know you can't control what she does, and obviously, she can't either.
intentions.....i would question.
love to you
jeri
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 782
Thanks for your thoughts.
I really know my co-worker had good intentions. Her sister is a cocaine addict, and she learned herself a couple of years ago to cut the emotional ties to her. She has been very supportive of my leaving, helping me remember why I've done the right thing when I start to question myself. I think she stayed on the phone with him so long out of understanding (because of her sister), pity (she said he was blubbering and crying), and because she's the advice-type...it's kind of her thing. She said she told him that he needed to get his a** back to work because if he didn't have any money it was his fault, that he was in complete denial of the problem, and that if he's alone on Christmas then it's his fault too because his family wanted him with them. He supposedly was upset because she was "defending" me, but he listened anyway. She told me that if she were me, she would get through those court proceedings as soon as possible because he was really in denial about it all and that then I could just try to put it all behind me.
I guess I feel weird because he is bothering her at work. Like I said, I think she enjoys being Miss Advice...it's who she is, and I like her for who she is. After all, she's helped me out too.
But I still think it was out of line for him to call her.
Again...I'm not sure why I posted. I guess I was just irritated and wanted to get it out. Thanks for listening.
I really know my co-worker had good intentions. Her sister is a cocaine addict, and she learned herself a couple of years ago to cut the emotional ties to her. She has been very supportive of my leaving, helping me remember why I've done the right thing when I start to question myself. I think she stayed on the phone with him so long out of understanding (because of her sister), pity (she said he was blubbering and crying), and because she's the advice-type...it's kind of her thing. She said she told him that he needed to get his a** back to work because if he didn't have any money it was his fault, that he was in complete denial of the problem, and that if he's alone on Christmas then it's his fault too because his family wanted him with them. He supposedly was upset because she was "defending" me, but he listened anyway. She told me that if she were me, she would get through those court proceedings as soon as possible because he was really in denial about it all and that then I could just try to put it all behind me.
I guess I feel weird because he is bothering her at work. Like I said, I think she enjoys being Miss Advice...it's who she is, and I like her for who she is. After all, she's helped me out too.
But I still think it was out of line for him to call her.Again...I'm not sure why I posted. I guess I was just irritated and wanted to get it out. Thanks for listening.
Always hopeful...
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Illinois
Posts: 429
I understand, kinda weird.....and an hour & a half????? that is a long conversation. I'm sure from what you've said she was doing it for you on your behalf, but I would feel kinda weird w/ it too. I would want that to stop.
You are getting so close to that court day.What did you do about the attorney thing? I'd get it over too, if that is what YOU want to do.
You are getting so close to that court day.What did you do about the attorney thing? I'd get it over too, if that is what YOU want to do.
Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: over yonder
Posts: 1,548
I can understand the co-worker, I am a listener, but yes, I would be angry at him for bothering my co-worker. I feel she was just in the wrong place at the wrong time and did the best she could with who she is. He was out of line.
I have done both things. Like call people that didn't want to hear it, and I listen to almost anyone.
I have done both things. Like call people that didn't want to hear it, and I listen to almost anyone.
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