He's actually going for help!!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: New York
Posts: 211
He's actually going for help!!
Well, The week from hell is winding down. Brought my husband home from detox today (only needed to be there 2 days as he is a binge drinker and really doesn't go through withdrawl after only going without for 2 days).
For those of you who don't know. Tuesday night he came home bloody and beaten up. Brought him to the local ER his eye was swollen shut and purple, he has a 3 inch laceration over his left eye, fractured his right maxilla (cheek bone) and has brusing on his ribs (evidently kick marks). And, he has no recollection of what happened. He does remember going to a local bar. But, still doesn't remember how he got home (and he drove hiimself).
ANyway, he's home. Both kids have now seen him (altough the 8 year old saw him come home in the bloody state - 5 year old was spared that night). We have told them what happened and they are sooooo happy to have daddy home. He has now admitted he has a problem and he actually could have used help for some time now. He met some interesting people in detox and has an appointment with out patient services on Tuesday. He now says he will not drink. And that he has a problem (I have been waiting to hear those words for years - can't believe he is finally saying them!!!)
I actually feel calmer and more peaceful now than I have felt in a long time. "Hitting rock bottom" has worried me. I was so affraid that he would get in an accident (kill himself or someone else). I am acutally relieved that this is all that happened (and believe me it's BAD).
Thank you for all of your help!!! You are all going through difficult times yet everyone is here for each other. I feel I have made friends here. Anns, Dancing Queen, Lyn --- so many of you. Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere. I'm no fool. I know this won't be easy and that it may not be the answer to everything. But, AT LEAST IT'S A START!!!!
Keep your fingers crossed.
NoDoubt
For those of you who don't know. Tuesday night he came home bloody and beaten up. Brought him to the local ER his eye was swollen shut and purple, he has a 3 inch laceration over his left eye, fractured his right maxilla (cheek bone) and has brusing on his ribs (evidently kick marks). And, he has no recollection of what happened. He does remember going to a local bar. But, still doesn't remember how he got home (and he drove hiimself).
ANyway, he's home. Both kids have now seen him (altough the 8 year old saw him come home in the bloody state - 5 year old was spared that night). We have told them what happened and they are sooooo happy to have daddy home. He has now admitted he has a problem and he actually could have used help for some time now. He met some interesting people in detox and has an appointment with out patient services on Tuesday. He now says he will not drink. And that he has a problem (I have been waiting to hear those words for years - can't believe he is finally saying them!!!)
I actually feel calmer and more peaceful now than I have felt in a long time. "Hitting rock bottom" has worried me. I was so affraid that he would get in an accident (kill himself or someone else). I am acutally relieved that this is all that happened (and believe me it's BAD).
Thank you for all of your help!!! You are all going through difficult times yet everyone is here for each other. I feel I have made friends here. Anns, Dancing Queen, Lyn --- so many of you. Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere. I'm no fool. I know this won't be easy and that it may not be the answer to everything. But, AT LEAST IT'S A START!!!!
Keep your fingers crossed.
NoDoubt
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
NoDoubt
Sometimes gifts come wrapped in black eyes and broken cheekbones. If this is what it took to make him take a serious look at recovery, then I would just say "than you God" and keep moving forward.
You have shown admirable strength and courage through all this, and my hat is off to you.
Sometimes gifts come wrapped in black eyes and broken cheekbones. If this is what it took to make him take a serious look at recovery, then I would just say "than you God" and keep moving forward.
You have shown admirable strength and courage through all this, and my hat is off to you.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Ohio
Posts: 444
and she cautiously says, "Looks like you're on the road to recovery!"
Sounds like a dream come true. I'll pray that it is. Keep working the program. I'm sure your family has a lot of growing and recovery to do here, but you are making great headway! Oh, to hear my husband say he has a problem--what I wouldn't give....
Though listening to you sure doesn't make it sound easy! :p
Take care of you and your family.
Hugs,
Lyn
Sounds like a dream come true. I'll pray that it is. Keep working the program. I'm sure your family has a lot of growing and recovery to do here, but you are making great headway! Oh, to hear my husband say he has a problem--what I wouldn't give....
Though listening to you sure doesn't make it sound easy! :p
Take care of you and your family.
Hugs,
Lyn
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: michigan
Posts: 33
Hi Nodoubt,
I kinda know what you are feeling , my fiance hit bottom when he was finally picked up a probation violation for dui in 98 and he is doing a year in Prison, he has been in an out of rehabs before and always has went back to drinking, we always hoped this wouldnt happen but that if it did, that this would more than likely be his breaking point, he has been in a jail/ facility since december 2001 , and he has had a long time to think things over, so we pray everyday that he will come out strong. We see a tremendous change in him and he said he feels pretty strong, but reality will soon be upon him so he works on keeping his faith in god and where there is faith there is hope. This has been a long road for the both of us and to hear him say some of the words i have longed to hear from him, I know how that can make you feel, pretty good.
I kinda know what you are feeling , my fiance hit bottom when he was finally picked up a probation violation for dui in 98 and he is doing a year in Prison, he has been in an out of rehabs before and always has went back to drinking, we always hoped this wouldnt happen but that if it did, that this would more than likely be his breaking point, he has been in a jail/ facility since december 2001 , and he has had a long time to think things over, so we pray everyday that he will come out strong. We see a tremendous change in him and he said he feels pretty strong, but reality will soon be upon him so he works on keeping his faith in god and where there is faith there is hope. This has been a long road for the both of us and to hear him say some of the words i have longed to hear from him, I know how that can make you feel, pretty good.
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Ogdensburg, NY
Posts: 30
Have faith
Dear Nodoubt,
I just wrote an awesome post but they wouldn't let me post it cuz it had too many smileys in it
Here is the "jist" of what I said.
I am happy for you for working your program. I am happy for your husband for taking his first steps. There is hope for everyone in your family. You will all be stronger because of this. I feel very hopeful for you and you need to hold on to the joy and happiness you feel.
Don't be like me...I didn't allow myself to get "too" happy or hopeful out of fear...no more. Now I revel in the joy I feel no matter if the joy lasts a minute or a day. I welcome it and love it.
I will be thinking of you on Tuesday. Please allow yourself to be joyful and keep working your program, it works and you are living proof.
Love and lots of smileys
Dancing Queen
I just wrote an awesome post but they wouldn't let me post it cuz it had too many smileys in it
Here is the "jist" of what I said.
I am happy for you for working your program. I am happy for your husband for taking his first steps. There is hope for everyone in your family. You will all be stronger because of this. I feel very hopeful for you and you need to hold on to the joy and happiness you feel.
Don't be like me...I didn't allow myself to get "too" happy or hopeful out of fear...no more. Now I revel in the joy I feel no matter if the joy lasts a minute or a day. I welcome it and love it.
I will be thinking of you on Tuesday. Please allow yourself to be joyful and keep working your program, it works and you are living proof.
Love and lots of smileys
Dancing Queen
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: New York
Posts: 211
Thank you everyone.
I will keep working the program.
He really seems to be coming back to me! I hope he can be strong and do this for himself.
I am trying to be very positive but still, I am scared. Fortunately, when he is at the out patient clinic on tuesday I will be at AlAnon (good timing!!).
My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
NoDoubt
I will keep working the program.
He really seems to be coming back to me! I hope he can be strong and do this for himself.
I am trying to be very positive but still, I am scared. Fortunately, when he is at the out patient clinic on tuesday I will be at AlAnon (good timing!!).
My thoughts and prayers are with you all.
NoDoubt
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: New York
Posts: 211
Thanks DQ
Things seem to be going very well. My husband is getting help. He went for his 1st out patient appointment on Tues. They called tonight and set up an appointment for tomorrow with a social worker. At that time they will discuss his treatment plan.
I hope things are going well your way as well!! You deserve it!
NoDoubt
Things seem to be going very well. My husband is getting help. He went for his 1st out patient appointment on Tues. They called tonight and set up an appointment for tomorrow with a social worker. At that time they will discuss his treatment plan.
I hope things are going well your way as well!! You deserve it!
NoDoubt
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