"Blue in the Face"
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Brantford Ontario
Posts: 11
"Blue in the Face"
Thats how I feel...
I can talk and talk but he will not listen-I woke up this morning(or should I say got up because I was awake all night to the sound of him partying)with the feeling that I have truly I have given up-I don't have much if anything left inside to deal with this...
Every week its the same-I tell him (like a regular person would need to be told this?much less reminded?Every week???!(His favourite excuse for everything is"I forgot"!!!!!))that if he is going to be drinking do not come home and blast the music "til all hours of the night into the early morning,to not have anyone over,to not smoke in the house,to not come and wake me up 'cause he's lonely( I have to be out 0f the house by 7am most days!) etc...we have 3 kids,its a school night,(AND this time my 2year old has been sick all week!!) and a very small house its not like we even have a separate rec room or anything so this behaviour really effects everyone!!
Am I making a big deal about this?It only happens once a week or so,but I feel on the day after that I want him to move out.. I've been living with him so long that I don't remember how to think properly or to validate my own feelings anymore...
And of course this morning on his way to work(on 1hours sleep!)he's pissed at me for not wanting to hug him or chat with him UGH!!!!
I know I've posted almost the same story before
,just needed to talk to someone...
I can talk and talk but he will not listen-I woke up this morning(or should I say got up because I was awake all night to the sound of him partying)with the feeling that I have truly I have given up-I don't have much if anything left inside to deal with this...
Every week its the same-I tell him (like a regular person would need to be told this?much less reminded?Every week???!(His favourite excuse for everything is"I forgot"!!!!!))that if he is going to be drinking do not come home and blast the music "til all hours of the night into the early morning,to not have anyone over,to not smoke in the house,to not come and wake me up 'cause he's lonely( I have to be out 0f the house by 7am most days!) etc...we have 3 kids,its a school night,(AND this time my 2year old has been sick all week!!) and a very small house its not like we even have a separate rec room or anything so this behaviour really effects everyone!!
Am I making a big deal about this?It only happens once a week or so,but I feel on the day after that I want him to move out.. I've been living with him so long that I don't remember how to think properly or to validate my own feelings anymore...
And of course this morning on his way to work(on 1hours sleep!)he's pissed at me for not wanting to hug him or chat with him UGH!!!!
I know I've posted almost the same story before
,just needed to talk to someone...
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 5,075
Originally Posted by cal
Am I making a big deal about this?I
I sound like a broken record myself sometimes - I need to learn over and over that the only person I can control is me. What are the boundaries you've put in place for this behavior?
Member
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 3,812
No problem... vent all you need too...
I have to agree this is your problem.... he does not think he has a problem and so his drinking does not bother him, it bothers you ...... so you have to do something about it.
Personally for me ... what you described would be totally unacceptable to me. I might do something like install a deadbolt on the inside of the house and lock it. When he comes home at all hours of the night to wake you and the children up... he could just party on the porch for all I care....
I guess the hardest part about boundries is following through with them... I struggle with that one myself.
I have to agree this is your problem.... he does not think he has a problem and so his drinking does not bother him, it bothers you ...... so you have to do something about it.
Personally for me ... what you described would be totally unacceptable to me. I might do something like install a deadbolt on the inside of the house and lock it. When he comes home at all hours of the night to wake you and the children up... he could just party on the porch for all I care....
I guess the hardest part about boundries is following through with them... I struggle with that one myself.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Brantford Ontario
Posts: 11
I might do something like install a deadbolt on the inside of the house and lock it.
(pulling out the yellow pages now... locksmith?)
Thanks for replying...just feeling lonely today...
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