Newbie feeling fragile...
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: right here, right now
Posts: 6,516
I could have sworn I responded to this yesterday! I was so thrilled to see this thread, and it was almost freaky, because I've had reason to revisit where I was a few years ago recently. (Did that sentence make sense?)
And I look at what I worried about:
The kids are alright, as the song goes. Stronger, wiser, more independent. They're going to be fine. We're not out of the woods by a long shot, but we've gotten damn good at orienteering.
Honey, living well is the best revenge. I'm happier than I've been since I was a kid. Seriously. I have Never. Ever. Been. Happier. As. An Adult. EVAH. Not only am I surviving -- I'm thriving!!!
Actually, he did. But at that point, he had burned enough bridges with enough people that the thought didn't even occur to him.
Now, I need to look at this and remind myself that most of the things we fear never happen.
And I look at what I worried about:
I worry a lot. I worry about our kids. I wonder what's worse, living with or without their alcoholic father whom they adore (when he's sober, and fear when he's not).
I worry about how I would survive if I left.
I wonder if he would hire a high-powered lawyer and try to take the kids away from me.
Now, I need to look at this and remind myself that most of the things we fear never happen.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Anchorage, Alaska
Posts: 4,719
Originally Posted by lillamy 
most of the things we fear never happen.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 110
You have so much strength inside of you to be dealing with your AH's alcoholism as well as focusing on your children - and I hope, yourself. Mother's so often put themselves on the backburner and *especially* in a circumstance such as yours.
It is AWESOME that you have been attending al anon so much since you first started going. Does your AH know that you attend?
It is AWESOME that you have been attending al anon so much since you first started going. Does your AH know that you attend?
Member
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 26
I've been going to Alanon for ... not sure, 5-6 weeks, I think. I didn't say a word at first, just listened. I knew they could help me, I just didn't know HOW. I still mostly listen, but I occasionally share. Just a little. I haven't been able to say yet that my AH threatened to kill me the last time he was drunk. No one has said anything like that at my meetings, and I am embarrassed that my life's got such drama.
I asked him (told him) to move out after that. He did. He hasn't had a drink since and he's been going to AA. So at the moment, things are calm. I *love* the calmness. Not sure where any of this will end up, but I'm going to keep going to Alanon, reading, thinking and praying
I asked him (told him) to move out after that. He did. He hasn't had a drink since and he's been going to AA. So at the moment, things are calm. I *love* the calmness. Not sure where any of this will end up, but I'm going to keep going to Alanon, reading, thinking and praying
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
