My Story
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: kentucky
Posts: 6
My Story
I don't know if this is the right place for this, but, if its not, Im sure you will let me know.
Well, here’s my story. I met my husband in 98’. He drank a case of beer a night and abused several types of pills. I didn’t think much of it, he was a young single guy who visited the strip clubs and “partied” a lot. I figured when he found himself a respectable girlfriend, that he wouldn’t have any need to do those things. Yeah right. I know you’re saying that too. After a year together, he ruined an evening out with me. He showed up at 11:00pm high as a kite. I had never seen him high, but I knew something wasn’t right. I never grew up around drugs, I didn’t know that coke and such where anywhere but New York and L.A. Yes, very naïve. I look back now and realize how unbelievably naïve and ignorant I was. Quite funny. Anyway, I told him that I wasn’t about to start a life living that way and that he needed to choose. Well, he did and I moved out. Four months later, I finally gave in to his pleas and went back. We wed in 2000. Not long after that, the affair started, as did his “affair” with meth. He was working out of town for 8 or 9 months and so I never knew until he came back home. I was pregnant with my first child and was scared to death to leave. I stayed. The girl was given up and he has since been clean of that, however, meth, has yet to be given up. Over the past 5 years and another beautiful child, I have done everything I can do to get him to “choose a different lifestyle.” I know, I see you shaking your heads. LOL He has a great job. He makes a lot of money, he owns his own business. I have always stayed home with the children and am absolutely scared out of my mine to actually have to work and be away from them. I hate saying that, it sounds like I’m just lazy. Sometimes I even wonder if that is it. But I know it’s just an excuse. I want to be with my kids, they are my escape. I have left once and he has left once. Always making promises and coming back within a month. I don’t even bother asking him to leave or following through with it because I know in a month or two, I will take him back. So why screw with the whole thing. I say that I won’t go through with this until I know that I won’t give in that easy, but will I ever really know???? Also, he won’t go quietly. That is HIS house and he has already threatened to expose my “secret meth habit.” He has threatened to set me up. Which, I know that he could easily be proven wrong and I know he is trying to scare me. It just sickens me to know that he would even say such things. He is in the wrong. Why can’t he admit it and say “Hay, I screwed up, I’m still screwing up, I will give you what you deserve.” Instead of “You’re just jealous because I weigh less than you and you think it’s the dope.” WHAT?! WHAT THE HE** IS THAT?! Is he so out of it, that he honestly thinks this way, or is he just trying to play dumb? I know what meth can do and I don’t want to be there. He isn’t your “typical” dope head, so he says and I used to also. He goes to work, showers, eats, sleeps. He just uses all day everyday. BUT, he is a robot. I didn’t realize that he was so mechanical until he quit for two months. IT WAS WONDERFUL!! I just thought that he was blah---------------didn’t get too happy or too sad, but WOW the smiles and the laughs and the twinkle in his eye when he was off of it. I almost wished I hadn’t got to see that, because know I know what I have lost. And, he just isn’t “here”. I can’t explain it, but from everything I have read on this site, I don’t have to, I know that you know. Oh, and I get this everytime “ YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE THAT HAS A PROBLEM WITH IT!”
Please, Please, Please tell me that you’ve heard that before. I can’t stand that one.
I am very grateful that I found your site, I stumbled upon it yesterday evening and read until 1:00 in the morning. I literally burst into tears when I read the “What Addicts Do” sticky. That’s him, I know it, just never have been able to accept it. I think my problem is, that I cannot let go of the “what it would’ve been like” The plans we had, the dreams we had. I had it all worked out and I CANNOT accept that this person cannot quit for his wife and kids. There is soooooo much that I have figured out about him over the years and I just cannot accept that he has these addictions, (porn also, but that’s a whole other story). I cannot accept that he is this manipulative, hateful, overbearing, “im a better parent than you, Im a better EVERYTHING than you, you are lazy, nasty and an unsupportive bitc* that I don’t like anymore” JERK!! I love him dearly, but I sure in the he** don’t like him. I have tried to detach, but it’s not even worth the tantrums and beat downs I get. (no, none physical). I just try to make peace and ACCEPT that this is who he is. I can like it or leave it. It’s like I don’t want to hurt him or something. I have bent over backwards and kissed his a** for SOOOOOOOOOOO long, its like I owe him something. Who I owe something to is myself and my kids. I am on medication for depression and whats funny is, is that if I don’t take it for a while, I cannot stand him, don’t want to talk to him and could give a crap less if he comes home or not. But, after being back on it, I can ACCEPT just about anything and tell myself that this was the hand I was dealt, so play it. Its funny, I call it my “make me like my husband” pill!!
That’s awful!! I know what I need to do, I know how I need to do it, I just won’t do it!! Whats wrong with me. I deserve soooooo much more and my kids deserve a happy, healthy mom. Why won’t I suck it up and just do it?!? I think Im addicted to this whole mess. Im addicted to the “trying to fix him”! I just know that one day, I will say the right thing and a light bulb will go off in his head and that will be it. I just can’t figure out what to say. The last post I read said “Addicts hear what you do, not what you say.” Oh, how true that is.
Thanks for listening. I know it was long. But kind of glad I got it all off of my chest.
Well, here’s my story. I met my husband in 98’. He drank a case of beer a night and abused several types of pills. I didn’t think much of it, he was a young single guy who visited the strip clubs and “partied” a lot. I figured when he found himself a respectable girlfriend, that he wouldn’t have any need to do those things. Yeah right. I know you’re saying that too. After a year together, he ruined an evening out with me. He showed up at 11:00pm high as a kite. I had never seen him high, but I knew something wasn’t right. I never grew up around drugs, I didn’t know that coke and such where anywhere but New York and L.A. Yes, very naïve. I look back now and realize how unbelievably naïve and ignorant I was. Quite funny. Anyway, I told him that I wasn’t about to start a life living that way and that he needed to choose. Well, he did and I moved out. Four months later, I finally gave in to his pleas and went back. We wed in 2000. Not long after that, the affair started, as did his “affair” with meth. He was working out of town for 8 or 9 months and so I never knew until he came back home. I was pregnant with my first child and was scared to death to leave. I stayed. The girl was given up and he has since been clean of that, however, meth, has yet to be given up. Over the past 5 years and another beautiful child, I have done everything I can do to get him to “choose a different lifestyle.” I know, I see you shaking your heads. LOL He has a great job. He makes a lot of money, he owns his own business. I have always stayed home with the children and am absolutely scared out of my mine to actually have to work and be away from them. I hate saying that, it sounds like I’m just lazy. Sometimes I even wonder if that is it. But I know it’s just an excuse. I want to be with my kids, they are my escape. I have left once and he has left once. Always making promises and coming back within a month. I don’t even bother asking him to leave or following through with it because I know in a month or two, I will take him back. So why screw with the whole thing. I say that I won’t go through with this until I know that I won’t give in that easy, but will I ever really know???? Also, he won’t go quietly. That is HIS house and he has already threatened to expose my “secret meth habit.” He has threatened to set me up. Which, I know that he could easily be proven wrong and I know he is trying to scare me. It just sickens me to know that he would even say such things. He is in the wrong. Why can’t he admit it and say “Hay, I screwed up, I’m still screwing up, I will give you what you deserve.” Instead of “You’re just jealous because I weigh less than you and you think it’s the dope.” WHAT?! WHAT THE HE** IS THAT?! Is he so out of it, that he honestly thinks this way, or is he just trying to play dumb? I know what meth can do and I don’t want to be there. He isn’t your “typical” dope head, so he says and I used to also. He goes to work, showers, eats, sleeps. He just uses all day everyday. BUT, he is a robot. I didn’t realize that he was so mechanical until he quit for two months. IT WAS WONDERFUL!! I just thought that he was blah---------------didn’t get too happy or too sad, but WOW the smiles and the laughs and the twinkle in his eye when he was off of it. I almost wished I hadn’t got to see that, because know I know what I have lost. And, he just isn’t “here”. I can’t explain it, but from everything I have read on this site, I don’t have to, I know that you know. Oh, and I get this everytime “ YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE THAT HAS A PROBLEM WITH IT!”
Please, Please, Please tell me that you’ve heard that before. I can’t stand that one.I am very grateful that I found your site, I stumbled upon it yesterday evening and read until 1:00 in the morning. I literally burst into tears when I read the “What Addicts Do” sticky. That’s him, I know it, just never have been able to accept it. I think my problem is, that I cannot let go of the “what it would’ve been like” The plans we had, the dreams we had. I had it all worked out and I CANNOT accept that this person cannot quit for his wife and kids. There is soooooo much that I have figured out about him over the years and I just cannot accept that he has these addictions, (porn also, but that’s a whole other story). I cannot accept that he is this manipulative, hateful, overbearing, “im a better parent than you, Im a better EVERYTHING than you, you are lazy, nasty and an unsupportive bitc* that I don’t like anymore” JERK!! I love him dearly, but I sure in the he** don’t like him. I have tried to detach, but it’s not even worth the tantrums and beat downs I get. (no, none physical). I just try to make peace and ACCEPT that this is who he is. I can like it or leave it. It’s like I don’t want to hurt him or something. I have bent over backwards and kissed his a** for SOOOOOOOOOOO long, its like I owe him something. Who I owe something to is myself and my kids. I am on medication for depression and whats funny is, is that if I don’t take it for a while, I cannot stand him, don’t want to talk to him and could give a crap less if he comes home or not. But, after being back on it, I can ACCEPT just about anything and tell myself that this was the hand I was dealt, so play it. Its funny, I call it my “make me like my husband” pill!!
That’s awful!! I know what I need to do, I know how I need to do it, I just won’t do it!! Whats wrong with me. I deserve soooooo much more and my kids deserve a happy, healthy mom. Why won’t I suck it up and just do it?!? I think Im addicted to this whole mess. Im addicted to the “trying to fix him”! I just know that one day, I will say the right thing and a light bulb will go off in his head and that will be it. I just can’t figure out what to say. The last post I read said “Addicts hear what you do, not what you say.” Oh, how true that is. Thanks for listening. I know it was long. But kind of glad I got it all off of my chest.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Keepin' my side of the litterbox clean
Posts: 2,136
I live in the "meth capital" of the United States....
More illegals cross over from Mexico with all the ingredients to brew meth on this side of the border than you can imagine. Lots of people here are raging alkies or meth heads. There's nothing for the teens to do, so they wander the street searching for cans. They collect enough, turn them in for $$ and to buy more meth. The "good ole' boys" running this hick town try to keep a lid on the problem, but it's a fact that Yuma, Arizona is the number one producer of winter lettuce and meth heads.
He ain't gonna give it up. Meth is extremely addicting. He's hooked and until he wants to get unhooked what you see is what you get. That's it. I'm sorry to be the bearer of such negative tidings, but he's being an addict. If he does something, he'll turn around and deny it or say YOU did it. I know, because I've lived with it. You begin to think you're crazy. You know what he did and what he said and he just sits there denying it. If you eventually corner him into admitting to his addiction, he'll attack in any way he can. He is going to protect his addiction before he will ever protect you or your children.
So that leaves you. You can stay and live with it. You can sit and hope that someday he'll see the light. You can wait until he hits bottom and loses everything he has. You can get a real job, start stashing away money and get your own place to live. But I guarantee you this: if you keep trying to get into his business, you will end up going nuts. He'll zone out on dope and you'll be the one who has the anxiety attacks.
P.S. - Anybody - and I mean ANYBODY - who is drinking a case of beer in a day is an alcoholic. Period. I think it's time you started focusing on how to have a better way of life for you and your children.
He ain't gonna give it up. Meth is extremely addicting. He's hooked and until he wants to get unhooked what you see is what you get. That's it. I'm sorry to be the bearer of such negative tidings, but he's being an addict. If he does something, he'll turn around and deny it or say YOU did it. I know, because I've lived with it. You begin to think you're crazy. You know what he did and what he said and he just sits there denying it. If you eventually corner him into admitting to his addiction, he'll attack in any way he can. He is going to protect his addiction before he will ever protect you or your children.
So that leaves you. You can stay and live with it. You can sit and hope that someday he'll see the light. You can wait until he hits bottom and loses everything he has. You can get a real job, start stashing away money and get your own place to live. But I guarantee you this: if you keep trying to get into his business, you will end up going nuts. He'll zone out on dope and you'll be the one who has the anxiety attacks.
P.S. - Anybody - and I mean ANYBODY - who is drinking a case of beer in a day is an alcoholic. Period. I think it's time you started focusing on how to have a better way of life for you and your children.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 5,075
Welcome, dedra
I think you're right, you know what to do. I "knew" it for a long time, too, but didn't do it. I truly didn't have a clue I was living with an addict. When I went to my first Al-Anon meeting I just cried and cried. I could not believe there was a name for what I was going through.
Fear of change and fear of the unknown are very tough to get past. When I was forced to make the decision a year ago to end my marriage (18 years together) I was terrified. I was so unhappy, but still did not want to let go. Someone who had been through it before me said, this will be the worst year of your life, but it will also be the best. I thought she was NUTS. Well, here I am a year later and yes, you guessed it, she was right.
Keep reading, get some help for yourself and think about giving yourself some breathing room before making major decisions. I'm sorry to say that most of what I've heard on meth is not good. Even if someone goes off it, the damage done appears to be irreversible.
Have you also tried posting on the Drug forum?
Please keep posting. I'm glad you found us, too.
I think you're right, you know what to do. I "knew" it for a long time, too, but didn't do it. I truly didn't have a clue I was living with an addict. When I went to my first Al-Anon meeting I just cried and cried. I could not believe there was a name for what I was going through.
Fear of change and fear of the unknown are very tough to get past. When I was forced to make the decision a year ago to end my marriage (18 years together) I was terrified. I was so unhappy, but still did not want to let go. Someone who had been through it before me said, this will be the worst year of your life, but it will also be the best. I thought she was NUTS. Well, here I am a year later and yes, you guessed it, she was right.
Keep reading, get some help for yourself and think about giving yourself some breathing room before making major decisions. I'm sorry to say that most of what I've heard on meth is not good. Even if someone goes off it, the damage done appears to be irreversible.
Have you also tried posting on the Drug forum?
Please keep posting. I'm glad you found us, too.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Keepin' my side of the litterbox clean
Posts: 2,136
Look in the stickies at the top of the board
If it's not there, here it goes:
My name is Jon. I'm an addict. And this is what addicts do. You cannot, nor will not, change my behavior. You cannot make me treat you better, let alone with any respect. All I care about, all I think about, are my needs and how to go about fulfilling them. You are a tool to me, something to use. When I say I love you I am lying through my teeth because love is impossible for someone in active addiction. I would not be using if I loved myself and since I don't, I cannot love you.
My feelings are so pushed down and numbed by my drugs that I could be considered sociopathic. I have no empathy for you or anyone else. It doesn't faze me that I hurt you, leave you hungry, lie to you, cheat on you, and steal from you.
My behavior cannot and will not change until I make a decision to stop using/drinking and then follow it up with a plan of actin.
And until I make that decision, I will hurt you again and again and again.
Stop being surprised.
I am an addict. And that's what addicts do.
My name is Jon. I'm an addict. And this is what addicts do. You cannot, nor will not, change my behavior. You cannot make me treat you better, let alone with any respect. All I care about, all I think about, are my needs and how to go about fulfilling them. You are a tool to me, something to use. When I say I love you I am lying through my teeth because love is impossible for someone in active addiction. I would not be using if I loved myself and since I don't, I cannot love you.
My feelings are so pushed down and numbed by my drugs that I could be considered sociopathic. I have no empathy for you or anyone else. It doesn't faze me that I hurt you, leave you hungry, lie to you, cheat on you, and steal from you.
My behavior cannot and will not change until I make a decision to stop using/drinking and then follow it up with a plan of actin.
And until I make that decision, I will hurt you again and again and again.
Stop being surprised.
I am an addict. And that's what addicts do.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 5,075
Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: OHIO
Posts: 959
Dedra - listen to what Prodigal says...she and I both know. I just lost my husband of 22 years to meth, alcohol and a meth alcoholic hooch. I didn't find out that he was doing meth until after he left the kids and I. START planning honey. He will lose it all, especially if he's 5 yrs into it. His house of cards are going to come tumbling down and when not if but when it does do you want it to come down on you and the kids???? Remember the 3 c's
You didn't cause it
You cant control it
And you cant cure it.
Stay strong and move the mountain for those kids. You will know when the time is right. Stay here with us we are here for you ok. (((((Dedra)))))
Oh by the way - WELCOME
Janit
You didn't cause it
You cant control it
And you cant cure it.
Stay strong and move the mountain for those kids. You will know when the time is right. Stay here with us we are here for you ok. (((((Dedra)))))
Oh by the way - WELCOME
Janit
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: anywhere but here
Posts: 25
You're not alone...
I think it's great you got all of this off your chest. Please know that you're never alone...even when it feels that way. Millions of us live with this crap (I swear it's the devil in disguise!) I'm curious...Do you have any support from family? Do others know what you're living with? My husband drank like a fish for years and I kept it to myself for so long! I think I was ashamed or something. Wow did it feel better when I started talking about it! I have been where you are to some degree. I have kids, too and have a husband that provides very well for us. I wanted to raise and protect my kids and know how strong that urge is. It tells me you're an excellent mother. You're trying to sacrifice your own happiness thinking it will give them the stability they need. Good in theory but I don't think it works. My husband doesn't drink much anymore. He drank again for the first time in a year and a half and my kids (8 and 11) saw him like that. I made him leave the house for a month so they would no it is unacceptable. I'm guessing your kids are still pretty young. It will be different when they see him acting like a loser...trust me. I can't tell you to leave or not. I can tell you that the only thing that has forced my husband to get help was my kicking him out. It was the kindest thing I did for him and it scared the pants off me! Anything else is enabling the behavior. Worst case scenario is that the courts will order him to pay you support. I was lucky in that my husband was so ashamed that he gave me everything while he was gone. Perhaps your husband might see that this is not the fault of you or the kids. A counselor who specializes in these matters would be a great idea for you. It might help you get a plan in place that you can live with. Now that I started working (house cleaning and making a bundle!), I no longer fear the lack of money. It's so freeing!
I worry that living with him will seriously affect your self-worth. That's a shame and I hope you'll take the bull by the horns before it happens. You really sound like a healthy, kind person who needs to find her smile again. Please keep posting as I'll be thinking and praying that you find peace!
I worry that living with him will seriously affect your self-worth. That's a shame and I hope you'll take the bull by the horns before it happens. You really sound like a healthy, kind person who needs to find her smile again. Please keep posting as I'll be thinking and praying that you find peace!
Member
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: anywhere but here
Posts: 25
Loved/Hated it
Prodigal...
I cried when I read your post. I had never heard that before and it's one of the saddest and most tellings things I've heard in a while.
Thank you (I think? ha, ha).
I cried when I read your post. I had never heard that before and it's one of the saddest and most tellings things I've heard in a while.
Thank you (I think? ha, ha).
Member
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Ohio
Posts: 233
Dedra,
And welcome to SR.
You really sound like you understand a lot about addiction, especially since you just stumbled on this site last night. You do deserve better and when you have had enough you will do what you have to do. No one can tell you when that is.
Maybe you could start by getting out to meetings or maybe getting a job. Just so you feel more secure about yourself and what you can do for you and your kids.
You are asking yourself all the right questions.
There is nothing you will say or do to get him to stop. If there was, addiction wouldn't be destroying familes all over the world.
Keep reading and posting..if nothing else..you will see that you are not alone. It is sad that so many of us are here, but is great support.
Hugs to you..Michelle
And welcome to SR.You really sound like you understand a lot about addiction, especially since you just stumbled on this site last night. You do deserve better and when you have had enough you will do what you have to do. No one can tell you when that is.
Maybe you could start by getting out to meetings or maybe getting a job. Just so you feel more secure about yourself and what you can do for you and your kids.
You are asking yourself all the right questions.
There is nothing you will say or do to get him to stop. If there was, addiction wouldn't be destroying familes all over the world.
Keep reading and posting..if nothing else..you will see that you are not alone. It is sad that so many of us are here, but is great support.
Hugs to you..Michelle
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: kentucky
Posts: 6
Yes, I feel like I know quite a bit about it. I just dont know much about what I am going through. I have support from my family. I tried to tell his family, but they just tend to ignore it. I really don't think they believe me, but Im not too worried about whether they believe me or not. This last time we fought about it, I yet again gave him another chance to choose. I know what will happen, so I need to start planning. I just don't know if I can go through with it. Im just stupid I guess. Thanks for all the replies and the stories, it made me feel a lot better.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Ohio
Posts: 2,579
Originally Posted by dedra
. Oh, and I get this everytime “ YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE THAT HAS A PROBLEM WITH IT!” Please, Please, Please tell me that you’ve heard that before. I can’t stand that one.
Please, Please, Please tell me that you’ve heard that before. I can’t stand that one.
So glad you found us!!!
To answer your question (above)...YES!!! I have heard in a million times!!!!!
Stick around here...you already have been given some good advice. Start to put the focus back on you and your kids,read and post,etc.,etc...things will start to get better for you. You are no longer alone in this...
Wipe your paws elsewhere!
Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,672
Fear of change and fear of the unknown are very tough to get past.
"Who Moved My Cheese"
Pick up a copy at your local bookstore. It will take less than an hour to read. Welcome to the forum.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 782
Jill, I was going to quote the same thing.
I think I will anyway.
Yes. Yes they are. I stood there looking at that big hurdle I had to jump over myself for at least 2 years. I tried lots of things. First I said there was really no hurdle there. Then there was a hurdle, but it really wasn't that obtrusive of a hurdle, so I could work around it. I called it different things, I ignored it, I would hide it behind something else, I would run right up to it as fast as I could over and over, but never jump. One morning out of the blue, I went to it with no running start and just jumped. And I cleared it. Surprised myself too.
I think I will anyway.
Originally Posted by denny
Fear of change and fear of the unknown are very tough to get past.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: kentucky
Posts: 6
Hay there. The police showed up and talked to him. He is fixing to get into a lot of trouble. Apparently he is really "involved" with something. I am going to my lawyer today. I was gonna file for divorce and get out of here, but I have been trying to change my mind all night. WHAT DO I DO???
Member
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: novato, ca
Posts: 181
I don't know much about meth. Saw a special on it and it was heart breaking to see what meth can do to good people. Sorry your dealing with this in your life.
I do know about trying to survive a relationship with an addict. I'm on the fence about what to do about my AH right now. Or to be more specific... about what to do about my life. I understand the pain of looking at giving up the dream of a happy family.
I like what Texas Girl said about running at that hurdle again and again before finally jumping it. It does seem to take an olympic effort. You sound like you've been in training for awhile and already have a lot of insight about what's right for you.
Good luck.
I do know about trying to survive a relationship with an addict. I'm on the fence about what to do about my AH right now. Or to be more specific... about what to do about my life. I understand the pain of looking at giving up the dream of a happy family.
I like what Texas Girl said about running at that hurdle again and again before finally jumping it. It does seem to take an olympic effort. You sound like you've been in training for awhile and already have a lot of insight about what's right for you.
Good luck.
Member
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 3,812
Welcome to SR... sorry about why you found us but you now have a support group and can start to work on solutions for your problems.
Today you dont "have" to take any action, just information gathering is all... I too would go to the attorney and find out what my options are... Im not sure if you cant talk to the police that came over and find out what they wanted but I might try. I would start looking at my finances and see where I stand, if I can stash some money away for emergencies.... I would start working on a plan for just in case.
You never know if he is in as deep as you think the police might just take care of this for you..... anyway you look at it though Im guessing that staying in denial is probably not going to be an option for you.
Please know your not alone, read all you can and find out all you can about this disease.... I look forward to getting to know you and watching your growth.
Today you dont "have" to take any action, just information gathering is all... I too would go to the attorney and find out what my options are... Im not sure if you cant talk to the police that came over and find out what they wanted but I might try. I would start looking at my finances and see where I stand, if I can stash some money away for emergencies.... I would start working on a plan for just in case.
You never know if he is in as deep as you think the police might just take care of this for you..... anyway you look at it though Im guessing that staying in denial is probably not going to be an option for you.
Please know your not alone, read all you can and find out all you can about this disease.... I look forward to getting to know you and watching your growth.
the girl can't help it
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: splendraville
Posts: 5,599
Originally Posted by dedra
Why can’t he admit it and say “Hay, I screwed up
You can't fix him but, you sure can fix yourself. Take care
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: kentucky
Posts: 6
hay there, reporting in lol I started the process of the big D friday. He finally left friday night and didnt give me too much trouble--24hours later he wants to know if i have his stuff ready YEAH RIGHT anyway my dad was admitted to the hospital sat. night and i asked him to keep the kids today so i could be with him--he was too busy, yet when i went to be with my dad, he showed up. of course i was wrong to be mad at him, he was just doing a thoughtful thing and thought he should be there for me--of course, i told him the right thing wouldve been to watch the kids, not follow me up there and i got the "i cant win for losing with you" speech. When he left i told him that since he wasnt busy he needed to go see the kids cuz they were asking about him and he says "cant, busy!" AND he took all mine and the kids stuff out of storage and piled it up in the backyard for me to drag in tonight--but ya know, thats okay, cuz that just makes me more mad and the hotter I get, the easier this is!! thanks for your thoughts and thanks for being here
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
