Janitw

Well...it's officially all over now. But I did have a chance to tell my AXH exactly what I thought of him. We had a half hour in a room together for the first time in over a year....I vented with everything that has been bottled up inside of me for over a year. And ya know what you guys? That was better than the settlement. He walked with nothing but the habit. I told him that it was time to pay up and he can keep his little meth who4e. I told him that he's been sleeping on a mattress that has more miles than a semi truck. So aim high and sleep wellllll. All in all I faired pretty well. Both properties and 4 years of spousal, half the 401K and it's all done. He gets nothing from the house, no equity went to him, and it's done.

Why aren't I happy? I still came home and cried. It felt good to get everything off my chest and he let me go on and on until I was silent....I told him to look at me in the eyes if he had a backbone left and when he did I noticed his eyes were as dialated as could be. He was high on meth!!! Thats why he wouldnt say anything. What has happened to him. I did tell him that I had been told that the night they met she slipped meth in his beer and that if he thought for one minute that the great sex was because of her he could think again. And that he wasn't the only one she's done that to or taken to church with her....none of it even phased him. He didn't believe me and I guess I can understand why. He just wanted the divorce and he wants to marry her I guess. This hurts - and hurts - and hurts.......thanks for listening.

Janit

StandingStrong

((( Janit )))

I am sorry that you are hurting. Honestly, I think crying is a pretty normal reaction to divorce, greiving, the finality of it all, and emotional exhaustion.
From what I understand of your post - you did fair pretty well financially. This is an opportunity Janit. Though it hurts like heck right now - you have to realize that you have the rest of your life to live as YOU want.
So what are you going to do FOR YOU?

Janitw

I have no idea sweetie....((((hugs)))) But I'm scared.

Live

Hugs, I know where Hillsboro is...I lived there with the ex ages ago! We could have some fun in Cincinnati! It is one of my favorite places as long as I don't have to drive anytime around rush time! LOL

I am sorry you are hurting. You don't deserve that. But....damn it, life is NOT fair, it is equal opportunity when it comes to big or bust. I would rather have lived big than bust. But I didn't get to write the script. I tried, oh believe me!
None of us would volunteer to be walking in the shoes of addiction, betrayal, divorce. I wish you well! It takes time, sometimes it takes longer time than we would like, but it is going to get better.
I have been devastated...and later I got to do and live things I never could have imagined before! So, Cheers! to your future!

denny57

(((janitw)))

I'm looking forward to your posts 6 months from now. You hang in there.

Janitw

Thank You everyone. I love you all. Hey Live. so you know where my crib is huh??? Wayne and I moved here 16 years ago from Dayton to be closer to the income property that I inherited and we fell in love with the area not to mention it was the last of cheap land. I will continue to come to this site and stay with all of you because I need you all. I hope that Karma bus hits the two of them square in the face. His alcoholism took him to a new low which was drugs and women....how sad. I will talk to you guys later ok.

Janit

Cynay

We need you too Janitw.... I have no doubt that in the near future a newbie will come in here with a story so close to yours it will be scarry..... You will be such a calm in her/his storm.

You know I was thinking about how this stuff happens...... I have to wonder, even though it seem wrong and bad, If God has a plan for us then maybe it is really divine intervention so you can have a happier more amazing life in the future......

*shrugs* Im weird though.

reader

My Grandmother always said When God shuts a door, he opens a window. Just know that u are never alone and that someone is thinking about u.

rivercitybelle

Keep on coming back! I found this place AFTER I'd gone through the battles, but if I can keep just one person from feeling as alone as I felt when I went through things... I'll keep posting.
There is hope. There is light at the end of the tunnel (sometimes it's a long walk though). There is life.
Now you can use the good dishes everyday and put what YOU want on the plate!

Janitw

Ohhhhh. you are all so wonderful - where ya been all my life??? Cynay - (hugs) thank you. Married 22 years and its just gone. But not forgotten. Ladies and gents you are talking to the newest president of the Highland County Chapter of the MAMa organization. Newly formed I might add. MAMa stands for: Mothers Against Methanphedemine. Meth took something from me and I don't want anyone else to lose what I lost. Especially where the children are concerned. Maybe I can stop some of it from reaching our schools, and our homes. And our lives...if I have to go into the jails I'll go.
I will hunt down and find any meth lab I can and have it shut down as fast as the law can make it happen. Any guesses where I'll start???

I realize that now with the kids grown and my life as a lowly loan officer I won't have too much excitment but maybe with this....it ought to do something to create some excitment don't cha think? Has anyone out there seen just what meth can do? It's not pretty. And I suspect that my ex will marry his connection real soon as I have heard. When and if he ever crashes only then will he realize what he sold us out for. When he realizes the meth lie.

I wonder if he can still "perform"???? From what I have learned after 6-9 months or so it doesn't work anymore. They want to do it but can't. Hummmm. Don't mind me I'm just thinking out loud again.

Love to All,

Janit

blizzard77

I've seen what meth can do in just a short period of time. It's a killer for sure and it kills faster than most addictions, including heroin. I've taken care of a few meth heads over a period of time and each time they come to the hospital for what-ever, they look 10yrs older than they did 6 months prior. It's sad, so sad and I am so very sorry for you that it has caused you such pain and heartache. He's going to end up dead, sooner than later and that is the saddest part of it all. A life wasted and destroyed. My thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time. But, really:You are better off without him and his addiction to meth in your life. As for the OW, she's probably nothing to him other than a connection as you said. Take care of you.