DesertEyes

From what I understand of alcoholics, they are unable to drink in moderation, so MM is deadly for them.

From what I understand of non-alcoholics, they _always_ drink in moderation, so they have no need of MM.

To me it sounds a lot like "Moderation Pregnancy".

Mike

WantsOut

This is interesting to me because I've always been in this drinking twilight zone. I cannot drink, I had to quit cold turkey. I fit the guidelines for alcoholism in the AA questionaire. But I did quit cold turkey without AA 9 years ago or so and I never drank again or felt tempted i.e no white knuckles here, just a decision not to live that way anymore. That's supposedly something a "real" alcoholic cannot do so I've been labeled by knowledgeable people as a "problem drinker". Yet I know for a fact that MM would not work for me. I would turn right back into a drunk and a drunk driver because once I drank I didn't care that I shouldn't drive.

To sum it up, I think it's dangerous and the founder's story does not surprise me.

sable1

I don't know if I fit the AA criteria for "a real alcoholic" either. I did manage to stop drinking after all.
But I have to admit, I think a lot about how I will be able to drink in the future. When my body is done healing from the damage alcohol has done, then I will finally be able to drink again. Moderately of course. Without any negative effects.

So far, moderation has not worked for me. My high tolerance makes it hard for me to get drunk on a moderate amount of alcohol, so I usually end up drinking for several people, even if I start out carefully sipping wine.
The thing is that I see other people getting drunk on very little, but if I drank that amount I would still feel sober, or at least like I needed a lot more to feel satisfied. I just always seem to need more and more.

Before I decided to abstain completely from drinking, I did attempt to become the type of person who could have a glass of wine or two and take it or leave it. I'm not there yet, but maybe I will be in the future? I will have to wait and see...

It's fully possible that I'm not an alcoholic, but that I was just a "problem drinker", allthough I have had indications that points to alcoholism.

The story is terrible. Really makes you think about what denial can do. I just couldn't live with myself if I knew I caused something like that. But I think that it was beautiful how the wife/ mother to the dead people forgave her....

Oops, just realized this was a very old thread

changeschoices

Moderation for alcoholics? No one suggests moderation for crack addicts or crystal meth addicts! It's all the same.

I've read some stuff online on "moderating drinking" that is written by people who are clearly alcoholics and in total denial. And one way you can tell is by the self-centered, angry, King Baby attitude that you can hear in the writing.

It makes me sad. How many more innocent people are going to die at the hands of drunk drivers, how many more loved ones are going to have their lives torn apart because of their A's, and how many more A's are going to die terrible deaths because of this "moderation" stuff?

I believe that some alcoholics can quit and stay quit on their own, with no outside help. I think they are extremely rare, but I do know one who's going on 20 years of sobriety. But I do not believe that any alcoholic can safely drink any amount. If you have to force yourself to moderate your drinking, you are an early to mid stage alcoholic, IMO.

choublak

I think the whole concept is stupid, I'll probably be deemed as being judgmental and noncaring for saying that, but I don't care.

If someone has to even CLAIM they can moderate their drinking, they are either an alcoholic or well on their way to becoming one. Fact.

akrasia

In other words,

"AlcoholalcoholalcoholalcoholWHENCANIHAVEANOTHERDR INKalcoholalcoholalcohol."

So, no, in my experience "moderation management" is just someone wanting to pretend they're not addicted.

choublak

Those who aren't addicted don't NEED moderation management.

CodieBird

My ABF's father went cold turkey many years/decades ago, but seems as if he simply substituted being an alcoholic for a workaholic. 70+ years old and still has no concept of how to enjoy his precious gift of life. It's one thing to quit and stay quit. Entirely another to address and correct the "stinking thinking" issues that lead one to becoming an alcoholic in the first place.

Now my ABF thinks he can simply "cut down" or quit and everything will be ok from here forward. Nope. Won't work for me...

SoaringSpirits

I am allergic to shellfish. There is no amount I can eat in moderation, it's either abstain 100% or eat it and suffer the consequences. That's how I see it for alcoholics.

Thanks for sharing this story. This woman's own denial has cost so much. That seems to be the theme with alcoholics --- they deny, deny, deny and they and everyone around them pay dearly.