equus

I worry when I believe something will happen which has potential to cause harm. I worry when I know my own actions are 'in the mix' and with that a certain portion of responsibility for the consequences. I worry when I want something to go well, like a kid that still believes wanting is in the top ten of ways to 'jinx' something - yet I'm not superstitious.

I worry because a part of me thinks it will prepare me for all outcomes, give me chance to travel in my own mind before being there in the flesh. I worry because I want to find answers to reassure me and I suppose part of me knows my worry will result in others that care offering me support. I would like to say I worry because I care but I know full well that caring is possible without worry and that often I worry because of a fear of my own discomfort.

I'm figuring that if I know why I do something I can work on not doing it, but if I just say I 'shouldn't' then I'm none the wiser....

So what about you? If you ever worry then when and why?

Sophia57

Like you, equus, I worry cos I think I'll cover all possible outcomes and have a solution ready for each one.

I also think it's partly a learned behaviour - my mother is the world's greatest worrier, to an exhausting degree. I've unconciously copied her behaviour all my life and it's only now I'm unlearning some of it.

I also think I worry cos I'm a 'fixer' and a part of me thinks this will make me indispensible so people won't leave me, plus somewhere inside it makes me feel important, or worthwhile.

Trying very, very hard to live in the moment..and to realise there's planning and accepting, much more positive and less damaging than worry.

S

GingerM

I worry about the unknown. In a life filled with chaos, every minute was unknown, so I was a perpetual worrier. I don't worry as much on the anti-anxiety meds I'm on, but there are still occassions that set me off. My worry has no real point to it, it doesn't prepare me, doesn't make me do any better at any task. I just eats at my insides.

I have a piano and voice recital this Thursday, I can already feel the worry setting in, even though I know my pieces are about as good as they're going to get.

equus

It's funny 'cos I get where you're coming from but my experience of it is almost the opposite. I don't mean that yours is wrong - it's jjust made me think about how much influence childhood has.

As a kid I would get loaded with any amount of responsibility I would take - my Mum rarely (if ever to my knowledge) worried about me. I used to feel a certain jealousy towards kids that cried where they could be seen, mixed with a little anger I think because at the same time they got comfort!!

I'm really trying to remember now - I think I felt alot of fear, times when being in trouble was very real but not much worry.

I think maybe I have learned to worry as I've opened up and stopped being quite so independent - I think it has got alot to do with the comfort I get from others if I'm worried. I don't like thinking this because it makes me wonder if perhaps part of me worries in order to justify a need for reassurance?

I admit wholeheartedly that I like reassurance, that it does reassure me, that I do feel better and as I rarely worry silently.... uhmmmmm - that's an uncomfortable thought.