My Night with SOBER people.

Old 08-19-2006, 11:57 PM
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My Night with SOBER people.

I ran into an old acquaintance of mine about two months ago. I didn't really like him back then b/c I thought I was a bad ass and that "having fun and laughing" was not cool.....I wanted to be like G. This guy was always happy go lucky. I didn't like that. And G thought him and his friends were freaks, so of course....well, you know.

Anyway, this guy was into drugs back then (weed, cocaine, acid, and drinking). I partied too, but the cocaine thing was a huge turnoff. I haven't seen him for 12 years or so...kinda forgot about him too. Turns out, six months ago, he got a DUI and was court ordered to to an extensive outpatient program, he has to take a urine test 2 times a week and uses a breath thing to start his car.

He really helped me alot to understand what the drugs can do to a person and how they take over ones mind. He told me that he had a choice...keep it up and lose his kids, or stop. He told me that he had to move and delete everyone he knew out of his phone and basically had to leave everyone behind to start his sober life. Its been a struggle for him, but he's doing it....and that's a lot for me to admire.

So for the last 2 months I've talked to him a lot, we laugh and share. He has been very helpful to me and I've been helpful for him (he just seperated from his girlfriend about 3 months ago b/c of irreconsilable (SP) differences). We are becomin good friends.....NOTHING MORE!!! lol He told me that filing for divorce was like ripping off a bandaid....good advice for me

So, today me and the kids went to the Paul Brown Stadium to watch his son and my neice play football (my neice happens to be a cheerleader for his team). Tonight, he had a "SOBER" party. Some of his friends from his NA meeting was there and a couple other friends of his were there. It was so nice to actually sit around a fire with people my age who weren't drinking, or smoking weed, or talking trash, or staggering, or acting stupid..pardon the expression. The kids all played together and the adults played too (there were four accustic guitar players there). It was relaxing! I really enjoyed myself, and I met some new people too G always told me that it helped him play guitar when he was drinking, that the two go hand in hand more or less...after he pawned his guitar, I realized that was just an excuse to drink.

Two months ago, I would have been totally uncomfortable going to a party were I knew no one....I never even gave it a thought tonight. I chimed in with these people like I've known them forever. And, although I didn't know any of the songs they played, I was comfortable. Could be my new attitude??? Who knows

Anyway, just thought I'd share.
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Old 08-20-2006, 05:18 AM
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sounds like a good time - it's nice to hear you are breaking out and doing something different, something that you never would have done before - taking a step into the unknown.
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Old 08-20-2006, 07:13 AM
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How very good to hear...and there will be more to come! Yay for you!
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Old 08-20-2006, 07:29 AM
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Forward we go...side by side-Rest In Peace
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Good for you..
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Old 08-20-2006, 08:32 AM
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Sober parties are the best!! And there's no spilled beer to clean out of carpets, or bong water in toilets or any of that. A few plates and glasses, some chip crumbs...that's it. The house doesn't smell funny for days afterwards!

You might consider throwing your own sober party for people you know, play games (I can recommend a few that are great for large numbers of people) and interact. Best thing about it is that you remember all the fun the next day!
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Old 08-20-2006, 09:02 AM
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I don't come in here too often, but your thread title caught my attention...I just went out to dinner with someone who doesn't use or drink too much...and it was like you describe...such a good feeling to walk in the restaurant with someone sober, and walk out with him the same way...

I'm glad you had a good time.
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Old 08-20-2006, 11:23 AM
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Welcome to what I often think of as "normal life". Where adults can get together - have a great time - without having to be drugged for it!
I'm glad that you got to finally see experience this!
As for the part about saying how you used to feel that ""having fun and laughing" was not cool....." - I remember (and dh and I have even discussed) just how many years I was oh so serious about everything and anything. I think, at the time, I felt that one of us had to be an adult and I was probably holding in alot of anger as well as just trying to deal with everything and keep it together. Dh also commented to me not too long ago how I've always been able to joke around and have fun with other people but not him. In truth, a lot of it was an act through the years to help hide the truth. Nowadays though, I see how much it's true.

We grow and we learn - and you are growing and learning! Enjoy Jessica!
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