How is everyone?
 

Hello All
I hope everyone is managing as best they can.
The weather is slowly starting to change in my part of Scotland. The odd dry and sunny ( but still cold) day, which sure does make you feel better. I find it lifts your mood a great deal.
Restrictions remain at tier 4 here, so unfortunately, there's no scope to really go anywhere, unless it's the supermarket! I try and spice it up a bit by going to a different store each week 🤣.
Had a call from my son, who is in prison. I hadn't heard from him for a couple of weeks, which is odd. He told me he had caught covid and had to be isolated for 12 days. He's ok.
I continue to work from home, and I have no idea when we'll be allowed back on campus. I'm extremely grateful to still have a job, and receive a salary each month - many people have lost their jobs, which impacts greatly on peoples lifes. I do miss my colleagues though, and the chats/laughs, and working remotely comes with its trials, but just keep reminding myself that I am in a fortunate
position.
Hope you are all taking good care of yourselves.
Much Love
Bute xx

Hi Bute,

It's starting to change here, too. A little more sun and warmth, more birds coming to the feeders. I have 6 bluebirds that I feed every day - they are lovely.

Glad you heard from you son. Hopefully, he has fully recovered from the virus. My son has moved from rehab to transitional housing. He wrote me of his deep hurt of me "turning my back." That's not how I felt, but it is his perception. I called him but he said he did not want to talk with me, not to call again and that he didn't know if he ever wanted to talk with me again. I said ok and that I was sorry I hurt him. So ... I will write him letters and try to keep the channel open, but unless he decides to forgive, there is nothing more I can do. Twenty years of this insanity has brought us to this place. It seems, in his mind, I either stay on the roller coaster with him, my life be damned, or he wants nothing to do with me. And while this makes me sad, I am not swamped.

Bella,
They perceive things "their way or the highway". I do believe that they think we should just go along with their lifestyle choices, and be engulfed by the sheer chaos and mayhem of it all. Shows you he may not gave truly accepted responsibility for his actions. My son is similar. I don't know if that will ever change.
Not alot we can do about that unfortunately. But I will most definitely not sacrifice my life either. I often think, if they could step outside of themselves, what would they see?
Like you, I have times when the sadness rears it's ugly head. I allow myself a 5 minute wallow, then kick it to the kerb!
Just keep doing what makes you happy, Bella.
Much Love
Bute x

Thing is, even if we could make that sacrifice of our lives for them, nothing would change. Two would drown, instead of one.

Absolutely spot on! 100% correct!