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Old 01-19-2019, 01:02 AM   #1 (permalink)
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I need help getting started (and persisting)


I quit drinking a few years ago, but I've always had food issues. I had hoped that after working the AA program, some sanity would surface in my eating habits. I guess like most people I have temporary successes when I do attempt to do something about it. I've read lots of books, watched lots of videos, but just like alcohol, self knowledge doesn't help.

I'm currently driving a truck over the road, I get to AA meetings when I can and I call my sponsor regularly. I have attended OA meetings in person and online, but none recently.

I have a food plan, I just can't get on it, and I'm tired of being out of control.

So anyhow, looking for support, and God willing a sponsor.

Thanks!
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Old 01-19-2019, 03:30 AM   #2 (permalink)
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just wanted to welcome you back to SR Hank

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Old 01-22-2019, 04:18 PM   #3 (permalink)
Crazy Train Robbery
 

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I quit smoking and drugs and drinking enough times to know that I'm going through withdrawal, from wheat. It's the same pattern and the same obsessive mechanisms inside. I've decided to forgo quitting sugar for the time being. As I said before I drive a truck, and it seems like every two minutes I see a billboard with a picture of a cheeseburger on it. I don't notice the liquor billboards anymore, but they used to be everywhere.
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Old 01-22-2019, 04:51 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I hope it'll get easier soon Hank

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Old 01-28-2019, 07:00 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Like you, Hank, I thought I had mastered my addictions, but here comes another one! I recently acknowledged that I am a binge eater, and depression and anxiety add to the challenge. I've been working with a therapist for about one month. The first thing she had me do was to have three regular meals daily (breakfast, lunch, dinner) and to increase protein. That made a big difference, especially since I no longer needed late-night binges. After a couple of weeks, she had me cut out sugar.
Not easy, but I lasted 10 days before I succumbed to a piece of cake and a slice of pie. I'm trying to eat mindfully, and I've had a pretty good week.
I know that I tend to take on too much all at once, and very soon I throw in the towel. I'm looking for non-scale victories. I understand your challenge, and I wish you well.
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Old 01-30-2019, 01:51 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I had to be home Monday for doctor appointments. They couldn't find anything towards the end of last week so I ended up being home Thursday night, which means I ended up having the fast food on Wednesday. I'm back out now, and was going to start again, but I bought some cold cereal to survive the weekend, and took it with me, read the ingredients, wheat. Also several metric tons of carbs. So as soon as I'm done with that, and the half case of energy drinks, I'll start. I don't know why I can't just throw them out, liar. I know. And I'll be fully expecting the withdrawals, more about that later, so if I start posting crazy stuff, it's not me, it's the Hunger.
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Old 02-03-2019, 12:21 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Day three without wheat, brain is in a fog and I got meth mites.
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Old 02-09-2019, 04:37 PM   #8 (permalink)
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The withdrawals were worse than I expected, lots of emotion, lots of anger. Not as bad as quitting smoking, but pretty close to quitting drinking.

I had been thinking recently of one of the readings from the 24 hours a day. I remember reading it in a meeting a year or two ago, and when I looked it up it was for Jan 7th. It says in Italics "Have I made the choice once and for all, so that there's no going back on it?" It struck home when I read it then. Early on, sobriety was kind of fragile. I, being a daydreamer, would fantasize of the possibilities that would make it okay to take a drink. I didn't really want to go back to drinking, but these fantasies were persistent, if this event happened, no one would blame me for taking a drink. Some time later, when we read the Jan 7th 24 hours it occurred to me that I wasn't having these fantasies anymore, and I was pretty sure I was done with drinking. At the end, alcohol wasn't giving me the effect I wanted. When I think of drinking I think how hard it was on my body to process so much alcohol, it really made my body feel bad.

I still have some trouble breathing, but I don't miss the continuous coughing and phlegm I had when I was smoking. I'm pretty sure I'll never smoke again, because if I ever do, I don't think I can go through quitting again.

I need to go to AA meetings to stay sober, I don't need a support group to stay away from cigarettes.

I'm just wondering when will I be able to say I've made the choice once and for all about wheat and sugar the same way I made the choice with alcohol and tobacco. And how what level of support will I need to stay off it for good.

Last edited by HankHaloperidol; 02-09-2019 at 04:38 PM. Reason: I don't need no stinking reason.
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Old 02-12-2019, 03:54 AM   #9 (permalink)
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Hi Hank- I can relate- I got off drugs 10 years ago and have 21 months of sobriety. But eliminating all sugar and drug food (foods that my body cannot tolerate or moderate) has been the hardest.

Since you drive a truck, I take it you have time to listen to podcasts- can I share with you the one that made me realize that my alcoholism was related to my food addiction: Here it is:

https://www.dietdoctor.com/podcast-t...bitten-jonsson

Bitten Jonsson is one of the world's leading experts on sugar/food addiction. I started a thread called "Sugar Addiction Recovery" after hearing this podcast, last summer.

I have not been abstinent for more than 14 days. Like you, I am constantly triggered by outside things- not billboard but for me it's the drug food that is in my home because of my children and husband.

Another thing that may help you is an OA group called "A Vision for You." This group has so much recovery in it and so much knowledge. I am currently working with one woman to find out my food plan and after that I will start working with a sponsor (which is new to me since I did not do the steps when I got sober.)

Here is a link:
https://www.avision4you.info/

You can call into the meetings while you are driving or listen to the meeting from the day before here:

Meeting Archives: Phone: 712-432-5203 Conf ID: 876148

* There are telephone recordings available for the past 30 days of phone meetings.* Press 0# to access the most recent recording. Enter the Share ID Number, followed by the # sign, to access any of the other recordings. Once the recording begins, press 4 to Rewind (#3 mins), Press 6 to Fast Forward (# 3 mins), or press 1 to Pause or Resume recording"

There are also a lot of great meetings under the "special editions" section found here:

https://www.avision4you.info/sunday-...ition-podcast/

Another place to start is to make a list of your trigger foods, or any foods you have tried to control. I worked on my list this morning. Sure, the obvious ones are sugar products but you may find this extends to things like condiments, artificially sweetened products- even gum and mints, even toothpaste. Or it may be fried foods for you etc.

And lastly, Bitten Jonsson recommends a low carb/keto diet with 2-3 meals and no snacking in between. I know you think this would be impossible as someone who drives a truck but I assure you that it's possible. There is a well known trucker in the keto community who makes it work. Here is a link to a podcast about that:

2 Keto Dudes - Episode #152 - Yogi Parker: The Keto Trucker

Feel free to pm me anytime or come visit the sugar addiction recovery thread. I want recovery from this as well- I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.
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Old 02-12-2019, 04:12 AM   #10 (permalink)
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Oh, for the sponsor- what I did was I had heard an amazing speaker podcast on A Vision for you (if you have iTunes you can find the podcast). I really connected to everything she said even though the podcast was a year old. As a member of the group (just register online) you have access to all of the members contact info. I found her and called her last week. She then told me to do a couple of things and call her back. Once I complete item #2 I will call her and see if she can sponsor me. If not, I will call someone else until I find a sponsor.
You may like a speaker named Don:

The podcast is from Jan 21, 2018
Living the Steps- Don C (NY)
You can find it in iTunes
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Old 02-20-2019, 03:27 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Sunflowerlife, I am listening to a AV4U meeting right now! How cool is that? I only get to one OA meeting a week so these recorded meetings are perfect for me while I walk the dog, housework or do simple data entry at work.

Hank, I wish you the best. 'No going back', 'No back door', etc are things I tell myself and I really believe it. The big challenges usually aren't a problem because I'm on guard for them. The little annoyances or boredoms of life are what I have to be vigilant about.

I used to allow people, places, events, and things "make" me eat. Very rarely these days with only minors slips. Thanks to a Higher Power and Step work, I've been abstinent from sugar since Nov 28, 2005.

The AV4U meetings are helping me to identify sneaky behavior and foods that act like sugar substitutes (not fake sugar, stevia, nutra sweet, etc). I am willing to tighten things up so that I can feel get even more recovery.
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Old 02-22-2019, 01:41 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Thanks, sorry I haven't responded sooner, I'll ramble more later
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Old 02-22-2019, 02:24 PM   #13 (permalink)
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In the mean time does anyone have recommendations for an android podcast player? I don't mind a subscription fee if it includes music.
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Old 02-25-2019, 03:30 PM   #14 (permalink)
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So I got google's podcast player. I listened to yogi and have links to the rest. I'm going to think about the door dash thing for groceries, I like fresh produce, but I don't know that I trust someone else to pick it out for me.

I'll start listening to those other podcasts, thanks for the links.

As tempting as it is, I don't think the keto diet would work for me. I'd prefer a vegan diet, but I can't stop five times a day just to poop. I'm eating mostly canned goods (soup, chili, veggies), packets of microwave rice, oatmeal with muscle milk. I have a couple of cans of tuna, chicken or salmon, which firms up the waste a bit, I wish I knew a non animal product that would do that. The plan works great when I get on it and stay on it, and I feel good too.

I haven't had wheat since Feb 1. I'm sugar bingeing off and on. I'll still count that as progress though.

LOL things "make" me eat! How many times the inside of my head blames my wife.

Last edited by HankHaloperidol; 02-25-2019 at 03:31 PM. Reason: Obama made me do it.
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Old 02-26-2019, 12:55 PM   #15 (permalink)
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One thing Yogi said about the pain going away, and attributing that to the increase in fats. In my experience, it's a lot of the carbs that are really inflammatory and cutting those out would relieve a lot of pain.

Anyhow I'm gonna go ahead and quit the sugar March 1.
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Old 03-03-2019, 07:48 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Hi Hank. I was actually coming to this forum to post something very similar, so I can certainly relate. I have 13+ months sober (yay!) and that part is going great, and I did lose 50 pounds in the first 6 or so months, but since then I've been stuck, with quite a lot of weight left to lose to be in a healthy range. I know this is because I have many of the same issues with food as I had with alcohol - binging, inability to moderate, using it as entertainment/comfort/etc. And the sugar/carbs really do get me into a sort of spiral of wanting more and finding it harder and harder to cut them out again (and of feeling guilt, frustration, etc). Thanks to all for the resources posted here! I can't wait to check them out.
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Old 03-07-2019, 05:01 AM   #17 (permalink)
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This thread really hit me today. I have a binge eating disorder that I just cannot rid myself of. Last night was another binge. Today is day 1. I am so down on myself and so depressed today for doing this. It is almost like an out of body experience when I go on these binges ...the cravings are insane. I am going to listen to this podcasts you suggested.
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Old 03-11-2019, 09:24 PM   #18 (permalink)
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I've listened to a couple of the speaker meetings. Work has been inconsistent, so has my eating. I haven't outright had sugar this month, but I'm still overeating. My wedding ring slips on and off okay, so I guess that's a good sign.

Many years ago my mother discovered she had problems with wheat/gluten. I started to shy away from it back then, ate it a lot less. I discovered that for me, cutting down doesn't do much good.

When I finally gave it up completely for the first time, after about a week I got hungry. It was real hunger and it wasn't so bad, not what it used to be like. The difference was it was hunger without anxiety, I was hungry but there was no urgency to get something in my stomach. I concluded that what I had mistaken for hunger before was actually withdrawal symptoms.

And here again, the low carb folks claim the ability to manage their appetite proves their diet is right (whatever works, idc really), and I might say hey, you're simply no longer bashing your opioid receptors.
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Old 03-27-2019, 04:43 PM   #19 (permalink)
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So... I guess I shouldn't have installed grubhub. I went 11 day doing really well, then there was some excuse and I ordered out., I realized yesterday I was on a binge and promised to get back on today. Things have been stressful and I promise to get back on tomorrow.
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Old 04-16-2019, 07:02 PM   #20 (permalink)
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I'm home for a day or so, I'm gonna go to an OA meeting, get some phone numbers and try to find a sponsor.
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