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Old 03-26-2009, 10:01 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Older women, younger men


What's Behind the Trend of Women Dating Younger Men? Exploring the modern coupling phenomenon
By Tina B. Tessina, Ph.D. Special to Special to *****! Personals Updated: Jun 13, 2008 [IMG]http://a323.*****fs.com/ymg/relationships/relationships-76338457-1213305626.jpg?ym2SWrADwXABIMdB[/IMG]


There appears to be a trend of older women dating younger men, notably illustrated by celebrity couples including Demi Moore and Aston Kutcher, Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry, and the most recent fling between 48-year-old Linda Hogan and 19-year-old Charlie Hill. According to a study of 50,000 women daters over 30, conducted by an online dating site in 2007, more than one-third of the subjects showed interest in men at least 5 years younger. And in 2003, an AARP survey revealed 34 percent of 3,500 women (between ages 40 and 69) dated men who are 10 or more years younger than themselves. This trend appears to be shocking to some people, but I don't find it so unusual.
Socially, there's a role reversal of sorts going on, women are more powerful now than ever before and may want men who are younger, and perhaps, more flexible; men who can handle it if the woman's career and lifestyle takes priority over their own. Media portrayals in "Sex and the City" (like movie characters Smith Jerrod and Samantha Jones) and "Desperate Housewives" are also showing women that dates don't have to be older. Women who have high-powered careers -- or a well-developed self-image -- are exercising more choice. Women who have been divorced and are established single moms may enjoy having a playmate, someone to have fun with; who doesn't try to control her.
Can these older woman/younger man relationships last?In my counseling office, I have seen many relationships succeed with this kind of older woman/younger man scenario. The media focuses on the age difference, but what really makes or breaks the relationship is how well the couple can form a partnership that works





The media focuses on the age difference, but what really makes or breaks the relationship is how well the couple can form a partnership that works.
Age difference is an adolescent worry: When you're a teenager, an age difference of even two or three years makes a vast difference in your experience and your outlook on life. Such a difference can interfere with communication, life goals, outlook, and relationship experience. In addition, for the young, the social reaction to such a relationship is often negative. If one partner is underage, a sexual relationship is even against the law.
But, as you get older, life experience and emotional growth help to equalize your relationship skills and resources. A 10-year or more difference in your ages makes little difference in how well you can conduct your relationship.
Don't focus on an arbitrary numbers difference in your ages. If you are getting along, you have good communication and problem solving, and you love each other, that's a precious thing, and far more important than any age difference could be. If other people have a problem with it, let it be their problem.
Whether or not a relationship is healthy is not determined by age differences, but by the interaction between the partners. A 10-year difference is not too difficult to bridge, but a 20-year differences or more in age can lead to some difficulties as the partners get older. For example, the younger partner may mature and reconsider his or her choices, or an older partner may confront aging problems much sooner. But, as long as both parties are adult, and the couple has talked about their age difference and the future possibilities, I don't make judgments about their respective ages.
Dealing with the generation gapThere are healthy and unhealthy reasons to date someone of a different generation. One inappropriate motivation for dating a younger person is fear of aging on the older person's part.





One inappropriate motivation for dating a younger person is fear of aging on the older person's part. A younger partner isn't going to reverse the aging process or protect you from old age. Obviously, a man or woman who dates someone as young as his or her children is going to run into some social opposition, but the differences that can cause the biggest problems within the couple's relationship are differing maturity levels.
As more and more women choose younger partners for relationships, the question arises: Are women in their late 30s and early 40s likely to be successful with partners who are 10 to 15 years younger than themselves?
Success in these relationships depends on what the motivations of both people are. Some older people feel younger at heart than their contemporaries and like to date people who are as active as they are. Chronological age doesn't always reflect either physical capability or emotional maturity. Sometimes an age difference creates a mentoring relationship the older person advises the younger one on life or career. This can backfire if and when the younger person decides he or she has learned enough, and wants to move on.
If you're asking: "Is it OK for me to have a partner who is much older or younger than I am?" You'll do better off if you forget about your ages and concentrate on whether the relationship works for both of you, or not. What really makes a romantic relationship succeed is the emotional connection.

What's Behind the Trend of Women Dating Younger Men? -- *****! Personals
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Old 03-27-2009, 11:25 AM   #2 (permalink)
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I think its been around for a while. Just not open in the public. Things are changing now and women aren't being as sneaky with all they're romances and lusty relationships like they used to haha.

Personally I started having relationships with older women at a fairly young age. So it was never weird for me. I was probably one of very few guys I knew dating and "seeing" older women but who cares? As long as both parties are honest early on there shouldn't be a big deal. When I was 18 my girlfriend was 37 and a lawyer. She never intended to suck me into a marriage and have a bunch of kids with her and I didn't expect her to go to a college party with me. None of her friends gave her a hard time for dating a younger guy and my friends teased me a little but most were actually jealous bc she was very attractive.

I'm all for it!
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Old 03-27-2009, 03:02 PM   #3 (permalink)
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Well, my clever mind as such at around 17 to 18, always thought it best to date women older. You didn't have curfew, not the drama with dating someone younger etc.

You have to have an emotional, connection whatever age
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Old 03-28-2009, 05:07 PM   #4 (permalink)
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And tell me, what guy out there when they were young DIDN'T have a "Mrs. Robinson" fanasty??? I sure the heck did! Angie Dickinson of "police Woman" was mine....
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Old 04-06-2009, 12:57 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I see that woman like older men more now and men like older woman more now. Maybe it is because I am older now so actually hang around those people, who knows...

I personally like older guys, and I know most guys like younger women so it works.

I know less young men ready and excited to date older men..

oh i dont know im just rambling sorry lol
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Old 04-06-2009, 03:37 PM   #6 (permalink)
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My 19 year old started dating a 42 year old ex Nike model. she looked young, wouldn't have guessed she was 42, maybe in her 20's. Soon found out she is the one who turned him on Crystal meth. Love her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm sorry but women that age who seek younger men want something more than just sex. They want complete control.
sorry, have a bad taste in my mouth about this subject
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Old 04-06-2009, 04:01 PM   #7 (permalink)
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I think anyone who gets involved with some out of their age group probably has some kind of issue.

Why do men want to date younger women? I think it because they are too immature emotionally and the same with women.

I was married to a man 11 years older than me years ago and the reason we split up is because I got tired of the burden of his emotional immaturity.
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Old 04-11-2009, 10:38 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Old 04-11-2009, 10:58 PM   #9 (permalink)
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hmmm, well. . .

Entering the "dating" scene at 40ish, with your desire is in overdrive (and here I always thought "peaking" was a myth) I have to tell you, men my own age don't usually give me a second glance. And dating men 40+ is always a crap shoot (maybe women too, I dont know) as far as stamina etc. So there have been times when someone ten or twelve years younger than me worked better (and longer HAHA, sorry, had too). Of course I absolutely wasn't looking for love, or even conversation really. . .
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Old 04-12-2009, 03:16 AM   #10 (permalink)
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I've always loved older women, the problem is now that I am going to be 38 next month I'm the same age as them, if you get my meaning...
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Old 04-12-2009, 09:41 AM   #11 (permalink)
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Haha
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Old 04-16-2009, 04:10 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I think anyone who goes for those specific "hot stereotypes" (be it platinum blondes or young hot pool boys) is trying to use their sexuality to up their ego. It's a status thing, not a love thing, and that can be very unhealthy to both parties involved.

However, age is honestly just a number. I tend to get along better with older guys, but that does not mean that these men are just waiting to pounce on recent jail bait. Same applies for women with younger men. It's all about the mental age, IMO.
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Old 04-16-2009, 05:33 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Interesting!

I dont know about the rest of the girls, but for me, if you are confident, dignified, at peace with yourself and know what you want, the right man will come along no matter what his age is. Whats on the inside, not the outside attracts me for sure. Each to their own I say and what you are comfortable with.
And dont we all create our own success.
Im not so sure that women actually head hunt younger guys at all. Maybe its just a media load of U-know-what!
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Old 05-01-2009, 03:15 AM   #14 (permalink)
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I heart trashy bleach blondes.
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