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Day 10 - Libido

Posted 01-08-2019 at 07:55 AM by LoveHateMerlot (Diary of Wino)

Honestly I have never in my life disclosed on social media or a website about my status of sexuality. I don't know the rules about discussing here, either, so I am going to keep it relatively mild. If you get offended easily, stop here...

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I started drinking at the young age of 16. I lost my virginity the same year.

After my mother found out that my birth father was abusing my two older sisters, she immediately...
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LoveHateMerlot
Posted in Diary of Wino
Views 40 Comments 0 LoveHateMerlot is offline
Old

Entry 1: Day 4 - shadows of things

Posted 05-08-2017 at 11:24 AM by SoberInStAlbans

As a pale, skinny and withdrawn child I could feel the impending move to WV. My parents had divorced 4 years before when I was 8.

There was something there. It was a sensation, a feeling. It felt like a knot in my chest or a gaping maw of blackness, it's smoky black tendrils spiraling outward.

I walked down to the local Harding's grocery store and bought a box of doughnuts. I came back home, likely alone in the house. I shut my door and opened the box. Sitting...
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Old

Where I've Been, Where I'm at Now

Posted 02-22-2017 at 05:14 AM by Steadwell (Clarity)
Updated 02-22-2017 at 05:38 AM by Steadwell

A recent newcomer posted in the forums about their heavy use of cocaine, which caused me to reflect back to my own experiences with the stuff. The last experience was a 3 year long daily affair with which eventually drained every dollar I could muster until I finally vacated the entire environment.

I realized even at the time how powerful it was. It made me lose all interest in alcohol, which has always been my drug of choice. However, when I finally made the decision to escape, there...
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Abstinence Apprentice
Posted in Addiction
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Old

Triggers and justifications? Doesn't matter when they are both lies

Posted 09-04-2016 at 12:04 PM by Lightning Bug (Sober Bug - Getting Sober to Achieving Recovery)

This post is about reflection, not something I am going through. It is an observation made now that I have a clear mind.

In active addiction I thought my main triggers were mostly of a big nature, like work, family stress, fights with the husband, criticism for something. I justified my drinking after these events because I honestly felt triggered.

What I am remembering now are the little everyday things that I thought were also triggers. I used the excuse "well...
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A Smart Bug is a Sober Bug!
Posted in Getting Sober
Views 664 Comments 1 Lightning Bug is offline
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Rating: 2 votes, 5.00 average.

Alcohol, Effexor, withdrawal, mental illness, and things I wished I knew then

Posted 07-21-2014 at 11:54 AM by SparkyMcSparky
Updated 07-22-2014 at 09:36 AM by SparkyMcSparky (Typos)

Almost at two weeks of being sober, and it has been a very interesting journey. In some ways it has been easier than expected (saying no to drinking), and in some ways harder (an occasionally very intense craving). However, I would state quitting drinking was easier than I thought it would be, and I am very thankful for the help of a number of the members on this forum for their ideas and support.

If quitting smoking was a 10/10 on the difficulty scale, I'd actually put quitting...
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Working-cl*** pseudo tough
Posted in Uncategorized
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