DAY 23 - Sober Pet Owner - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Every day is a new day, that's what I keep telling myself. The struggle is real. I'm in deep with this addiction to wine. I am searching for the answer how to turn it off. I feel lucky if I can keep it down to a daily minimum of just one bottle. I pray to God to take this addiction away. Some days I'm a fighter. Other days are a bit more challenging. Hopefully by putting this out there, starting today, I can find a new hope and believe in myself again.

LoveHateMerlot
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DAY 23 - Sober Pet Owner

Posted 01-21-2019 at 09:20 AM by LoveHateMerlot
Updated 01-21-2019 at 10:30 AM by LoveHateMerlot

I had lunch with my oldest sister yesterday, she is 8 years older than me. Growing up, she has always been my best friend. We laugh so hard we cry. We usually spent every single weekend together, lots of drinking. As time went by, we got older, alcohol became more and more a problem for us both. She had spent 30 days in rehab and I tried to quit on my own.

The past year our relationship has been a little rocky. I had been hurt by broken promises and she had been hurt by me lashing out and wanting to fix her problems. She is a single mom, working many hours and going to school on top of that. She hardly drinks now for the past few years and I am so proud of her for that accomplishment. Her ex is an addict, as well, and used to beat her. She left him several years ago, and he is now in prison for something else.

My sister's 14 y/o daughter and my 14 y/o daughter are best friends. This past year my niece spends all day at home, she rarely leaves the house, and misses weeks of school. My niece is self conscious and depressed. My sister needs to take her to a specialist to start therapy, and I try not to get involved but it's hard. I kept getting angrier this past year, because my sister isn't taking action to help her daughter. There was no healing between my sister and I, no moving forward, and bad communication.

I have been sober for 23 days and my approach to my relationships are now different. My sister calls me "more chill". I tend to overreact and take my emotions to the most extreme level when I drink. When I am sober, I am rational. I know my sister should take her daughter to therapy, I also know she has issues of her own that form a road block in order for her to take care of what she needs to take care of.

We went to lunch yesterday for the first time in a long time, and it was long overdue. I was able to focus on the love I have for my sister, instead of what I think she is doing wrong. I do many things wrong, I don't need to try to fix other people's problems. What I did instead was listen. I just sat and let her talk. I know allowing her to be able to just talk about what is happening in her life can be very therapeutic.

Now this is crazy. We own an 8 year old white Persian cat, her name is Boo. I am more of a dog person, and we had purchased this cat as a present for our daughters. She is very cute, just a big puffy cloud with a powder pink nose, pink ears, and pink paw pad. She is not mean, but she is definitely not a people person. She is more like a decoration in our home, than part of the family. Everybody who comes in giggles at her appearance and want to hold her so bad, but she won't let anyone, she just runs away. About 3 days ago Boo started following me around the house. She started jumping up in my lap. She started taking naps snuggled up against me. At night she jumps up on our bed and comes straight to me to snuggle. She is only behaving this away towards me. It's like she woke up 3 days ago and realized I'm her mommy. Even a relationship with a stupid cat can change after sobriety. My cat is even now responding to my more "chill" demeanor. Who knew?
Posted in Diary of Wino
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