DAY 11 - Hope - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Every day is a new day, that's what I keep telling myself. The struggle is real. I'm in deep with this addiction to wine. I am searching for the answer how to turn it off. I feel lucky if I can keep it down to a daily minimum of just one bottle. I pray to God to take this addiction away. Some days I'm a fighter. Other days are a bit more challenging. Hopefully by putting this out there, starting today, I can find a new hope and believe in myself again.

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DAY 11 - Hope

Posted 01-09-2019 at 07:24 AM by LoveHateMerlot
Tags hope , libido , sober , wine , wino

This morning I woke up to my 6:00 am alarm with no problem! Wow!
I woke up with a positive attitude and a smile on my face. I haven't felt this great in a very long time. I will not take this feeling for granted and will use this power to give my life a boost. So I set quite a few goals for the day. Mainly school, I'm working on the 4th Real Estate education course, 2 more courses to go before I get my license, and it's been long and grueling! Today I see the light at the end of the tunnel! Also I love art, I haven't painted for a year, so I am forcing myself to pull out an empty canvas tonight.

I want to use this sunshine in my soul and abundance of energy to be productive, you never know how long it will last, so I am going to keep this post short and sweet and get some sh*t done!

I have an update on my status of the absence of a libido. For anyone struggling with losing a desire while going sober, I feel you. I have not had any desire to be intimate with my husband since DAY 1. I have felt ugly and dirty, such raw feelings, despite my husband's efforts. I went to bed last night tired, craving wine, feeling empty, and had so much anxiety over my liver, pancreas, heart, brain, and kidneys. I pushed him away.

This morning I woke up brand new, energized, refreshed and ready to kick some booty. Do you know what else I feel? Ready for "that talk in the bedroom" when he gets home from work tonight

Hey, the hopes and desires may only return briefly, but when they do CEASE THE DAY.

Posted in Diary of Wino
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