Day 32 - I want to go home. - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information
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Every day is a new day, that's what I keep telling myself. The struggle is real. I'm in deep with this addiction to wine. I am searching for the answer how to turn it off. I feel lucky if I can keep it down to a daily minimum of just one bottle. I pray to God to take this addiction away. Some days I'm a fighter. Other days are a bit more challenging. Hopefully by putting this out there, starting today, I can find a new hope and believe in myself again.

LoveHateMerlot
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Day 32 - I want to go home.

Posted 04-16-2017 at 10:03 PM by LoveHateMerlot
Tags drunk , god , mother , relapse , wine

I pray to God every day, that I had a different life, and didn't have this constant, loud voice telling me it would be so much better if I had a drink in my hand. Maybe I'll be sober one day for good. I know it's not happening here in Texas, surrounded by temptations left and right. I want to go home, back to Washington, to my husband. It's weird because I've absolutely hated the past 8 months since our move to Seattle. What a lonely life since my move to Washington. At least it's easier for me to stay sober there. God has a plan, I'm going to trust Him. He moved me there, away from the alcohol, to sober up and focus on why I'm here on earth.

I got to talk to my 18 year old daughter today for the first time since I kicked her out (I was sober and needed to happen). She sounds happy, living in California now, and she told me she loved me. I don't take that for granted. That talk today meant the world to me. My baby girl, she is so important to me.

Not sober, not yet. Hopeful. It's not over. Still fighting the fight. God help me.
Posted in Diary of Wino
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