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Every day is a new day, that's what I keep telling myself. The struggle is real. I'm in deep with this addiction to wine. I am searching for the answer how to turn it off. I feel lucky if I can keep it down to a daily minimum of just one bottle. I pray to God to take this addiction away. Some days I'm a fighter. Other days are a bit more challenging. Hopefully by putting this out there, starting today, I can find a new hope and believe in myself again.

LoveHateMerlot
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DAY 45 - Mood Swinging

Posted 02-12-2019 at 08:30 AM by LoveHateMerlot (Diary of Wino)

Sober is slowly becoming a norm for me now. I am invited to start 'Girl, Wash Your Face' at my neighbor's book club tonight. I am super excited to be surrounded by new people. I love getting the opportunity to meet new friends. My neighbor told me, "...and I'll have wine!". Of course you will have wine, that's what society expects at a women's social gathering.

We are both fairly new to the neighborhood, so I haven't had a chance to hang out with her yet, this will...
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LoveHateMerlot
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DAY 33 - Results - Positivity Exercise

Posted 01-31-2019 at 07:18 AM by LoveHateMerlot (Diary of Wino)

The past several days I have been down in the dumps, feeling like, "Am I ever going to feel normal again?". I have been wanting to give up on my sobriety, dangerously allowing those "what if's" lure me back into the dark side. Yesterday, I tried to "manifest" what I ultimately needed. I simply need to find my happiness again.

Yesterday I decided to focus on stopping any negative thought that entered into my brain dead in its track. Any time a negative...
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DAY 32 - Super Bowl

Posted 01-30-2019 at 01:21 PM by LoveHateMerlot (Diary of Wino)

With all the hoopla of the Super Bowl coming up this Sunday, I am endlessly reminded that I cannot drink. My life is a fart. I am going to be totally honest, it's been weighing on me, heavily. Going to a Super Bowl party is like diving into a deep ocean full of booze. You can't escape it, it's all around you. I am trying to convince myself that I will have a great time without booze, and that takes a lot of energy.

So I am going to take the time today in this blog to work through...
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