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Every day is a new day, that's what I keep telling myself. The struggle is real. I'm in deep with this addiction to wine. I am searching for the answer how to turn it off. I feel lucky if I can keep it down to a daily minimum of just one bottle. I pray to God to take this addiction away. Some days I'm a fighter. Other days are a bit more challenging. Hopefully by putting this out there, starting today, I can find a new hope and believe in myself again.

LoveHateMerlot
  1. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    DAY 38 - Facebook

    #facebook #relationships #fake #sober #society #real #love #meaningful #true #wine #wino #sobriety #daughter #mother #bond #help #happiness #alcoholic #drunk #alcohol #socialmedia #save #judgmental
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    Posted 02-05-2019 at 08:45 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
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    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    DAY 31 - Morning Wood

    #sobriety #sober #wine #wino #mom #stop #drinking #memories #pain #painful #exposed #raw #real #child #molestation #abuse #alcohol #alcoholic #anger #intimacy #marriage #communication #speakup #depression #sad #lonely #struggle
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    Posted 01-29-2019 at 03:12 PM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  3. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    DAY 22 - Lying to a Doctor

    Hey thank you for your support! I'm so sorry you were diagnosed with fatty liver disease. It's definitely better than cirrhosis, though, and you still have a chance to repair. I am so curious, because I may be in the same boat. Do you mind if I ask? How long ago was your diagnosis of a fatty liver? If you did not experience pain, why and how did they find your fatty liver disease? Are you currently taking the measures now to aid in the reverse of the damage? How long have you been sober? Has there been improvement to your liver since you were diagnosed?

    I am pretty positive I have liver damage, without a diagnosis yet. The fear, among many other things, is a drive to keep me sober.

    I plan on getting an entire diagnostic of my entire body, not just my liver. I am sure my brain, heart, pancreas, kidneys, etc have all taken a hit. I will share my results after I confess to my doctor what I have really been up to. My doctor did clear my supplements last year, we had a long conversation about the benefits of turmeric, dandelion, garlic, apple cider vinegar, lemon, a multivitamin ...nothing too crazy :-)
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    Posted 01-20-2019 at 11:48 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  4. Old Comment
    nmd's Avatar

    DAY 22 - Lying to a Doctor

    Even without liver pain, i was diagnosed with fatty liver. Doctors won't argue with you or play investigator. Doing the most you can heal would include getting all the diagnostics needed and doing every thing it takes to stay sober. Honesty, guilt, shame, none of those feelings really matter to your liver. Im glad you have an appointment to get checked out. Sending my support and empathy

    Ps. Be careful with the suppliments. Dosages arent standard or scientifically tested and they can often be more damaging than helpful
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    Posted 01-20-2019 at 08:47 AM by nmd nmd is offline
  5. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    DAY 22 - Lying to a Doctor

    #liver #repair #damage #reverse #pain #sober #alcoholic #help #hope #survivor #disease #alcoholism
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    Posted 01-20-2019 at 08:07 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  6. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    Day 21 - ACTION!

    #relationships #addiction #mother #alcohol #alcoholic #wine #wino #victim #children #help #sober #sobriety #forgive #change #better #saved #action #anxiety #depression #teenager #teen #struggle
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    Posted 01-19-2019 at 11:30 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  7. Old Comment
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    DAY 20 - 'Twisted Repeat'

    #poem #alcohol #abuse #pain #addiction #suffering #help #sickness #disease #sober #sobriety #wine #wino #poetry #relationships
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    Posted 01-18-2019 at 11:33 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  8. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    DAY 19 - Alcohol, the Liver, and Hormonal Imbalance

    #liver #function #repair #help #alcohol #dying #cirrhosis #fatty #heal #healing #alcoholabuse #save #advice #hope #faith #journey #survivor #pain #suffering #videos
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    Posted 01-17-2019 at 01:07 PM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  9. Old Comment
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    DAY 18 - Marriage - An Alcoholic's Perspective

    #abuse #alcoholic #relationships #marriage #therapy #blog #help #wine #wino #sober #sobriety #mom #anger #passiveaggressive #love #respect
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    Posted 01-16-2019 at 09:38 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
    Updated 01-16-2019 at 11:25 AM by LoveHateMerlot
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    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    DAY 13 - Recalibrating Friendships

    #friends #friendships #girls #gossip #relationships #sober #sobriety #wine #wino #moms #strength #hope #courage
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    Posted 01-11-2019 at 08:51 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  11. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    Day 6 - AA

    #alcoholism #aa #wine #wino #drunk #recovery #sober #sobriety #alcoholic #help #addiction
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    Posted 01-04-2019 at 10:20 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  12. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    DAY 5 - Friends and Cocktails

    #wine #drunk #friends #sabotage #alcohol #alcoholic #sober #sobriety #drunkmoms #winos #help #support
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    Posted 01-03-2019 at 10:10 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  13. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    Day 4 - Christmas Eve Nightmare

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Eastcoaster20 View Comment
    Love this! So happy we are on this journey again together. ��
    It is a miracle to have an incredible person that I love very much on the exact same path with me. Seriously you give me so much strength and power xoxoxoxoxo!
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    Posted 01-02-2019 at 11:37 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  14. Old Comment
    Eastcoaster20's Avatar

    Day 4 - Christmas Eve Nightmare

    Love this! So happy we are on this journey again together. ��
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    Posted 01-02-2019 at 11:31 AM by Eastcoaster20 Eastcoaster20 is offline
  15. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    Day 4 - Christmas Eve Nightmare

    SoberRecovery Content

    #sober #journey #recovery #wine #alcoholism #alcoholic #help #sobriety #life #happiness #courage #strength #friends #compassion #selflove #abstinence
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    Posted 01-02-2019 at 11:21 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
    Updated 01-17-2019 at 06:39 AM by LoveHateMerlot
  16. Old Comment
    CreativeThinker's Avatar

    Day 31- It is what it is

    Why wait until you get home? Jus' Sa'in

    I'm doing OK...today was somewhat of a fog and I don't know why. I'm just going to rack it up to a bad day.

    Anyway...stay safe...TTFN!
    CT
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    Posted 04-17-2017 at 04:02 PM by CreativeThinker CreativeThinker is offline
  17. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    Day 31- It is what it is

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by CreativeThinker View Comment
    Hey Girl-I'm so sorry you're struggling. I want to send you a friend request but I can't figure out how to do it here on SR....Grrr!

    Please know that I am thinking of you and you're not alone. Just because you slipped, doesn't mean you need to throw away your sobriety for good. I've relapsed many, many times and I know exactly where you are right now. Don't do what I did and fall back into the same pattern that brought you here to begin with. The last time I relapsed, it took me years to get back on track. I wasted so much time and I've kicked myself in the a** for it ever since.

    You can do this...relapse is part of the process (in my book), learn from what threw you so that the next time you will be able to fight like hell to overcome the AV. Get back up on the horse sista! You will thank yourself every day for it! You're worth it!

    xoxo
    CT
    That's so incredibly sweet, CT! I appreciate your inspiring words and encouragement. I'm definitely not about to give up hope. God was there for me today in a very special way, I know he needs me to be sober in order to fulfill my purpose. I'm not sober today. I'm wanting to be sober, and will be so much easier when I leave Texas and return to Washington. So much easier to be away from alcohol. My husband helps me a lot, too, and he's still supporting me, knowing I slipped.

    Thank you again, CT, I need all the support I can get right now. Hugs and kisses to you! Wishing all is well with you, darling! Xoxoxoxo
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    Posted 04-16-2017 at 09:49 PM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline
  18. Old Comment
    CreativeThinker's Avatar

    Day 31- It is what it is

    Hey Girl-I'm so sorry you're struggling. I want to send you a friend request but I can't figure out how to do it here on SR....Grrr!

    Please know that I am thinking of you and you're not alone. Just because you slipped, doesn't mean you need to throw away your sobriety for good. I've relapsed many, many times and I know exactly where you are right now. Don't do what I did and fall back into the same pattern that brought you here to begin with. The last time I relapsed, it took me years to get back on track. I wasted so much time and I've kicked myself in the a** for it ever since.

    You can do this...relapse is part of the process (in my book), learn from what threw you so that the next time you will be able to fight like hell to overcome the AV. Get back up on the horse sista! You will thank yourself every day for it! You're worth it!

    xoxo
    CT
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    Posted 04-16-2017 at 08:00 AM by CreativeThinker CreativeThinker is offline
  19. Old Comment
    Eastcoaster20's Avatar

    Day 23 - Attitude

    I feel your pain. I drank two seltzers during dinner out tonight as I watched every other diner drinking wine and cocktails. Put me in the worst mood and ended up going to bed early. We will be happy with ourselves in he morning though. Much different than what we would've felt a month ago. We've got this!
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    Posted 04-08-2017 at 01:44 AM by Eastcoaster20 Eastcoaster20 is offline
  20. Old Comment
    LoveHateMerlot's Avatar

    Day 17 - Mary Jane

    Yes Eastcoaster20! So happy we share this point of view and outlook on weed! I know I grew up in a world where kids were educated by school districts and a higher authority to teach us that this is the gateway drug. Now I'm older and have been through hell....beers with my boyfriend at 16 was my gateway to wine at 20...and alcohol is killing people all over, but it's legal? Frustrating, because I too watched a 21 year old girl die from cancer a year ago, my sister had to purchase pot illegally for her to help her when the meds weren't enough.
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    Posted 04-02-2017 at 08:51 AM by LoveHateMerlot LoveHateMerlot is offline


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