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Old 07-02-2006, 09:00 PM
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Question Im new at this

Hello,
I'm 36, married with a 12 year old daughter. I've not drank for 2 full days and have made inquiries about going into a treatment program. My husband likes partying, hanging with the neighbors as do I however I do realize that my drinking is out of control and has been for many years. I cannot just have 1 glass of wine, beer or anything for that matter. Instead I end up drinking 8-12 beers and a hard liquor drink on top of that before calling it a night. I seem to drink every other night although more so lately. It seems when early evenings roll around and I get dinner started it makes it so easy to do this, it's been like this for a long time and I can't seem to break the pattern. I'm tired of hangovers, fatigue, cloudy headed etc.... I had filed for divorce 1.5 months ago from my husband of 17 years due to him going through some mid-life crisis and wanting a different lifestyle in general however I'm starting to see that it's going to have to begin with taking away the alcohol. All of our neighbors/friends seem to drink, how the heck is this suppose to work??? My husband says he will be supportive yet he doesn't seem to have dependent issues with alcohol even though he drinks frequently he can stop after a couple, ya know? I have been to AA a few years ago but I'm thinking I need something a bit more intense. The urge was there tonight even though I was able to refrain remembering that Friday evening I was home alone and ended up sick. Any advice would be appreciated.
Thanks for listening
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Old 07-03-2006, 02:41 AM
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Welcome to SR bizy, Congatulations on the 2 days sober...!
Im only 1 week today myself,but im sure other with more sober time than me will be along soon.!With a wealth of info n surpport.

Sounds like you've got alot on your plate. Sorry to hear things arn't going well.The road to recovery does'nt seem easy.

You have noticed that you have a problem with the drink. So take it from there. Speacking to your Dr, might be a starting point or an agencie that can surpport you at this time.

Wishing you all the best in your choice to stay sober.
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Old 07-03-2006, 03:53 AM
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Hi Im Sharon and Im an Alcoholic.

Thanks bizygal for sharing.

2 full days sober is a beginning. But don't stop there.

17 yrs marriage. I use to think the same when i was there back when. Now its 24 yrs and but for the Grace of my Higher Power we r still together. There is alot invested in marriages that last that long.

There are many things we could do when under the influence and if we folllow thru with them and regret it later.....well.....don't rush into anything just yet. Allow time for the fog to clear and u can see clearer before making life long permantely changes in ur life. Right now ur thoughts and actions will appear to be distorted.

I began to hit bottom back in Feb 90 when i ran off the road hitting a concrete culvert sitting on top the ground less than a mile from my home at 2 in the morning retunring from a club. or local water hole. I dont remember the ride in the EMS truck which led me to a 10 day stay in the hospital with them removing a punctured spleen are i would have bled to death.

After a few months healing very nicely with the help of pain pills.....well after the pills stopped working for me i returned to my drinking. It was then that the PROGRESSION OF MY DISEASE WAS VERY RAPID. EXTREMELY RAPID that i tried to end my life. I just couldnt go anymore. I had tried to stop drink SO MANY times without success.

It was then my family stepped in and did a family intervention on me. It was them doing for me what i couldnt do for myself. The police came to get me with a court order to take me to rehab. I passed my family looking at them with SO MUCH ANGER and HATRED for what they did to me. Away i went in the back of a handless police car like i was a criminal. I felt so disgusted, humiliated, ashamed.

I spent the next 28 days in rehab recieving the tools of recovery and the knowledge that would set me on the path to learn to live free of alcohol ONE DAY AT A TIME.

Many suggestion free for the taking. And i wanted it more than u know because i hated who i was and what i had become because of my DISEASE OF ALCOHOLISM.

When i left rehab i was on my own. I had a family at home and i knew what I needed to do if i wanted to stay sober. So selfishly i went to meeting after meeting bringing cookies and things to eat for my service work. I got me a sponsor whom today i still have not replaced. She was someone i admired and appreciated. She NEVER told me what to do but rather by suggestions led me to staying sober a day at a time. She had what i wanted so bad. Peace, serenity and hope and the admiration and love of others whether it be her family or friends.

It's time to begin taking care of urself now. When i got sober it was suggestioned that i needed to change things. To change people, places and things that would remind me of drinking. That means to get these things out of the house. EVERYTHING. To replace drinking friends and family with sober support. These people u will meet at ur AA meetings. The more u go the more people will see u there and begin to know u and before u know it u have a wonderful AA support of an AA family helping each other thru good times and bad times in recovery.

It wont happen over nite but it can be done. If u go to meetings u will hear the AA message of recovery. U will begin to see the MIRACLES of those so desperate restored to sanity. Just stay awhile to see the transformation esp. the looks on their faces. It is truely something awesome to experience and u can have that too, just ONE DAY AT A TIME.

Hang in there and message me anytime u need encouragement as u begin ur new journey living a sober happy life. What a wonderful journey that will be for u and ur family.

Thanks for letting me share.
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Old 07-03-2006, 06:21 AM
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Welcome to SR! There are a lot of wondefule people on here and someone will be along soon with some advice for you. It being a holiday weekend/week, some may be out of town so just be patient, I know you can do this and you have a good start! Hang in there!

GP
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Old 07-03-2006, 06:28 AM
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Welcome to SR, I'm glad you found us.

Congratulations on your 2 sober days! You can stop drinking and there's lots of support and information here.

If your husband says he will be supportive, then that is great. Maybe he'd agree to not having alcohol in the house or drinking in the house? That would help you a lot. Making changes is definitely a big part of recovery and that can include friends and how you spend your time. It might be a good idea to find different ways to spend your evenings and weekends. Take up a sport, go walking, do volunteer work, get out and do something that you enjoy. There are tons of things to do that don't involve alcohol.

You can do this!
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