Alcohol... life is about your choices
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Join Date: Mar 2006
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Alcohol... life is about your choices
This may come as a surprise to a lot of people, but I do not think of myself as an "alcoholic". I am a person that has exercised poor choices in how and when I drank. drinking has even got to the point that I could not see myself choosing to stop.
The bottom line for me is that I have always had a choice and it was my failure or abdication of the power to exercise that choice that led me to drink excessively and for way too long.
The moment I started thinking about myself of as a victim instead of a person I opened myself up to looking for excuses... one of them being alcohol. Life can be difficult and mine definitely has had its challenges... left home at 14 b/c the fear of the unknown, living on my own, was less than the fear of the known, living with my mom and her new husband (both were raging out of control drinkers and he used drugs ta boot).
Despite leaving home at a very young age I never looked at it as anything but a different set of challenges than my friends, etc., had. I wasn't a victim. It wasn't until I went through university and really saw the privilige and the opportunities that many of my classmates had that I began to see myself as a victim... that led to a downward spiral.
Once I id'd myself as a victim I began making bad decisions and excusing myself... instead of dealing with the anger over what I perceived as the injustice of my childhood, I looked for ways to quell it... my choice and my mistake.
Despite completing two degrees and finishing in the top 1/2 of my class from a top school, I let my past and my perceived injustices drag me down into making poor decisions. The moment I stopped doing that and began taking responsibility for myself as I had when I left home, my life improved and my drinking stopped.
Everyday when you wake up you have a choice, do I drink or don't I. That choice will determine the course of your day. Choose wisely.
Peace, Levi
The bottom line for me is that I have always had a choice and it was my failure or abdication of the power to exercise that choice that led me to drink excessively and for way too long.
The moment I started thinking about myself of as a victim instead of a person I opened myself up to looking for excuses... one of them being alcohol. Life can be difficult and mine definitely has had its challenges... left home at 14 b/c the fear of the unknown, living on my own, was less than the fear of the known, living with my mom and her new husband (both were raging out of control drinkers and he used drugs ta boot).
Despite leaving home at a very young age I never looked at it as anything but a different set of challenges than my friends, etc., had. I wasn't a victim. It wasn't until I went through university and really saw the privilige and the opportunities that many of my classmates had that I began to see myself as a victim... that led to a downward spiral.
Once I id'd myself as a victim I began making bad decisions and excusing myself... instead of dealing with the anger over what I perceived as the injustice of my childhood, I looked for ways to quell it... my choice and my mistake.
Despite completing two degrees and finishing in the top 1/2 of my class from a top school, I let my past and my perceived injustices drag me down into making poor decisions. The moment I stopped doing that and began taking responsibility for myself as I had when I left home, my life improved and my drinking stopped.
Everyday when you wake up you have a choice, do I drink or don't I. That choice will determine the course of your day. Choose wisely.
Peace, Levi
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Well, I know there was a period when I was choosing to drink or not drink. But, at some point, and I don't know exactly where that was, I stopped being able to choose to not drink. I simply wasn't able to stop. However, I never saw myself as a victim because of that. I wasn't a victim. I was an alcoholic, I had a disease. That's not an excuse.
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Hi Levi,
I agree about being choice-centered in recovery. I am sharing the following excerpt from another recovery group I belong to. I did not write it, but it is a description of most successful recoveries:
1) I accept that I cannot drink safely;
2) I commit unconditionally to total abstinence from alcohol;
3) I discover and acknowledge the obstacles to my personal development;
4) I develop and implement solutions that enable me to overcome those obstacles, using the resources of my choice, including the exchange of support and assistance with others.
5) I continue to explore avenues to personal fulfilment.
It is not intended as a program for incorporation into meetings or for imposing on anyone, but it certainly describes how I have tried to live.
Problems are described with a mixture of clarity and flexibility.
Solutions are outlined, but individual choice, difference and responsibility are enshrined.
I agree about being choice-centered in recovery. I am sharing the following excerpt from another recovery group I belong to. I did not write it, but it is a description of most successful recoveries:
1) I accept that I cannot drink safely;
2) I commit unconditionally to total abstinence from alcohol;
3) I discover and acknowledge the obstacles to my personal development;
4) I develop and implement solutions that enable me to overcome those obstacles, using the resources of my choice, including the exchange of support and assistance with others.
5) I continue to explore avenues to personal fulfilment.
It is not intended as a program for incorporation into meetings or for imposing on anyone, but it certainly describes how I have tried to live.
Problems are described with a mixture of clarity and flexibility.
Solutions are outlined, but individual choice, difference and responsibility are enshrined.
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Join Date: Mar 2006
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Miss C, is this smart recovery or rational recovery or something else? I like the train of thought and thank you for sharing it.
I have found that the moment that i began exercising my CHOICES my life began to change... add to that when I began to take personal RESPONSIBILITY my life really began to take on a whole new wonderful perspective.
Its funny much of what you wrote is very similar to AA's twelve steps, but without the religion.
Peace, Levi
I have found that the moment that i began exercising my CHOICES my life began to change... add to that when I began to take personal RESPONSIBILITY my life really began to take on a whole new wonderful perspective.
Its funny much of what you wrote is very similar to AA's twelve steps, but without the religion.
Peace, Levi
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It IS similar to AA's 12 steps but without the religion because it is from Agnostic AA. I attend and am starting up in my town a couple of "Freethinkers AA" groups, which is an AA based 12 step program, but, which does not use god as its basis for recovery. I have nothing against AA either. I also attend AA and love it!
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Join Date: Oct 2004
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All the science points to the fact that free-will eventuallly becomes hijacked by the amygdala region of the brain in addicts and alcoholics. So while my poor choices to use drugs and alcohol got me into this situation, there was a point where the poor choices were no longer controllable. That is why this is better viewed as a disease rather than a moral dilemma.
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Skunk, if that works for you, all the best. I have not found that it works for me. For me it is about accepting my choice and my personal responsibility. When I initially tried to quit I bought into the disease model, it didn't work ... in fact I drank more. When I realized it was about my choices and that I had the responsibilty for making healthy choices or bad choices and had to live with the consequences, life became simpler, clearer as did my decision making. I am now sober and not craving booze at all.
That works for me regardless of what the "science" you refer to says... by the way, what scientific literature are you refering to? I am not familiar with that theory and would be interested in checking out the sources and peer reviews. As a person I am always interested in new ideas and new theories, yours is one that I am unfamiliar with.
My anatomy and psychology studies in undergrad indicated the following re the lymbic system and the amygdala "The limbic system of the brain is a group of structures which govern emotions and behavior. The limbic system, and in particular the hippocampus and amygdala, is involved in the formation of long-term memory, and is closely associated with the olfactory structures (having to do with the sense of smell)." I can see the argument for the theory you are espousing, but I am not familiar with any medical or academic theories or literature substantiating it.
Anyway, regardless of how we find sobriety, as long as we do... Peace, Levi
That works for me regardless of what the "science" you refer to says... by the way, what scientific literature are you refering to? I am not familiar with that theory and would be interested in checking out the sources and peer reviews. As a person I am always interested in new ideas and new theories, yours is one that I am unfamiliar with.
My anatomy and psychology studies in undergrad indicated the following re the lymbic system and the amygdala "The limbic system of the brain is a group of structures which govern emotions and behavior. The limbic system, and in particular the hippocampus and amygdala, is involved in the formation of long-term memory, and is closely associated with the olfactory structures (having to do with the sense of smell)." I can see the argument for the theory you are espousing, but I am not familiar with any medical or academic theories or literature substantiating it.
Anyway, regardless of how we find sobriety, as long as we do... Peace, Levi
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Join Date: Oct 2004
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Sorry I don't have any references to peer reviewed scientific literature. Not that I could understand it if I could. I am a layman, but I do accept the opinions of those who do the research, just as I accept the advice of any other proffessional.
Real alcoholics are pre-disposed and vulnerable to the disease, via certain genetic makeups, that researchers are discovering.
http://www.webmd.com/content/article/87/99592.htm
Now this wouldn't be much of a problem if people didn't drink. But for those of us who do begin to drink, we begin to damage the section of the brain that actually would give us the ability to control impulsive behavior, the pre frontal cortex. Unfortunately research is showing that those who begin drinking early, bring about more damage.
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/medi...p?newsid=30653
I don't believe in the disease as a cop out method, and I believe that whatever workse for you, works for you. Cognitive therapy is very powerful and induces chemical changes in the brain itself. But for myself, I cannot blame my baffling behavior entirely on my "Freewill". I have tried going the route of taking "control" of my disease and it has never worked for me. Although it does work for some people, as evidenced by those who can quit on their own for the rest of their lives and those who use Trimpsey's RR with success.
Best of luck,
Chris
Real alcoholics are pre-disposed and vulnerable to the disease, via certain genetic makeups, that researchers are discovering.
http://www.webmd.com/content/article/87/99592.htm
Now this wouldn't be much of a problem if people didn't drink. But for those of us who do begin to drink, we begin to damage the section of the brain that actually would give us the ability to control impulsive behavior, the pre frontal cortex. Unfortunately research is showing that those who begin drinking early, bring about more damage.
http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/medi...p?newsid=30653
I don't believe in the disease as a cop out method, and I believe that whatever workse for you, works for you. Cognitive therapy is very powerful and induces chemical changes in the brain itself. But for myself, I cannot blame my baffling behavior entirely on my "Freewill". I have tried going the route of taking "control" of my disease and it has never worked for me. Although it does work for some people, as evidenced by those who can quit on their own for the rest of their lives and those who use Trimpsey's RR with success.
Best of luck,
Chris
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My problem is that for YEARS I knew it was my choice to drink or not to drink or how much to drink. For YEARS I made the choice not to drink and then would somehow do it anyway. For YEARS I would say, "Tonight I will have 3 beers and then I will be done," and then wake up the next day wondering what the he!! happened. Even after I made the choice to go to treatment and end the insanity, I still had to have a drink. When it wasn't a drink, it was pot. It was only when I allowed others to make the choices for me, i.e., go to treatment and do what they told me to do, that I was able to begin to stay sober.
I am well aware that what I describe is my experience only, and that others have different and equally valid experiences, I just thought I would share what I know!
Thanks for the thread, Levi. It really got me thinking!
I am well aware that what I describe is my experience only, and that others have different and equally valid experiences, I just thought I would share what I know!
Thanks for the thread, Levi. It really got me thinking!
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