Day 364 - woooo hoooo
everything is already ok
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
Day 364 - woooo hoooo Its Saturday Morning and its the 364th Day sober for me, tomorrow is my 1st birthday and I am so grateful for this daily gift of sobriety, it fills me up to overflowing some days.
One year ago I was on the last day of a 10 year bender. I had drunk away a business, my family, friends or most of them, was living alone and was so lonely. I had no money and a pile of bills about two foot high, but I managed to find money for two or three bottles of wine each day. I worked, but was so sick that I was losing jobs and I knew on this day one year ago that this was the end for me.
I knew because I had been there before. 20 years before I had stopped using smack after 13 years of using smack speed and anything else I could get my hands on. I survived that somehow after waking up in hospitals many times, spending 4 years in prisons. I was a common garden street addict and was dying when I decided to stop and stayed stopped for over twenty years.
I bust because I had no program and went crazy slowly, I also left all my supports behind when I moved to Australia and eventually started using booze in the same way I had used drugs, to oblivion, every day.
I feel and look so different today, just look, oh you cant see me! My worst day these times is millions better than my best day drinking. I was lucky enough to find a program (AA and NA) and to hang around with members who worked there program and include me in there days.
Today I do goofy things like, smile and laugh a lot, support other members in any small way I can, every day I go to at least one meeting, I pray each day to my HP who I choose to call DAD
My whole life has a skip in it these days, its not all roses but I move through each day with the knowledge that I can handle whatever is placed in front of me today and there have been some trying times.
I have found a good job, I went for average money and a relatively low stress job. I spend lots of time talking with my daughter and with my AA/NA friends. I have never in all my life had some many friends or so many Phone No's.
So I will celebrate this weekend by going to meetings and spending time with the people who have supported me for this time.
Lee thanks for the SMS's and your friendship, its great to know you and see you Sunday.
Eddie, I have spent every day of this year with you, you are a fantastic companion and a wonderful person
Everyone else here at SR (too many to mention) thank you for your daily support through all of your posts.
Jon, I don't know you but thank you so much for SR
So my message to you then is, this is just the first year, I firmly believe it gets better much better, so if your new and or struggling, don't pick up that drug or that drink, do something new, talk to someone, post here (it saved me), go to a meeting, just hang on because my words cant tell you how worthwhile it is, but my love can help support you and my year clean and sober proves its possible.
Love Kevin
PS I will probably write more tomorrow
One year ago I was on the last day of a 10 year bender. I had drunk away a business, my family, friends or most of them, was living alone and was so lonely. I had no money and a pile of bills about two foot high, but I managed to find money for two or three bottles of wine each day. I worked, but was so sick that I was losing jobs and I knew on this day one year ago that this was the end for me.
I knew because I had been there before. 20 years before I had stopped using smack after 13 years of using smack speed and anything else I could get my hands on. I survived that somehow after waking up in hospitals many times, spending 4 years in prisons. I was a common garden street addict and was dying when I decided to stop and stayed stopped for over twenty years.
I bust because I had no program and went crazy slowly, I also left all my supports behind when I moved to Australia and eventually started using booze in the same way I had used drugs, to oblivion, every day.
I feel and look so different today, just look, oh you cant see me! My worst day these times is millions better than my best day drinking. I was lucky enough to find a program (AA and NA) and to hang around with members who worked there program and include me in there days.
Today I do goofy things like, smile and laugh a lot, support other members in any small way I can, every day I go to at least one meeting, I pray each day to my HP who I choose to call DAD
My whole life has a skip in it these days, its not all roses but I move through each day with the knowledge that I can handle whatever is placed in front of me today and there have been some trying times.
I have found a good job, I went for average money and a relatively low stress job. I spend lots of time talking with my daughter and with my AA/NA friends. I have never in all my life had some many friends or so many Phone No's.
So I will celebrate this weekend by going to meetings and spending time with the people who have supported me for this time.
Lee thanks for the SMS's and your friendship, its great to know you and see you Sunday.
Eddie, I have spent every day of this year with you, you are a fantastic companion and a wonderful person
Everyone else here at SR (too many to mention) thank you for your daily support through all of your posts.
Jon, I don't know you but thank you so much for SR
So my message to you then is, this is just the first year, I firmly believe it gets better much better, so if your new and or struggling, don't pick up that drug or that drink, do something new, talk to someone, post here (it saved me), go to a meeting, just hang on because my words cant tell you how worthwhile it is, but my love can help support you and my year clean and sober proves its possible.
Love Kevin
PS I will probably write more tomorrow
Nature Girl
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: By The Lake
Posts: 60,328
Congratulations, Kevin and Happy Birthday!!
Thank you for sharing your story. It means a lot to a codie like me because it's stories like yours that give me hope for my son. I pray that one day he will find a better way, just as you did.
So, thank you for "hope" and for sharing your recovery with all of us.
Hugs,
Thank you for sharing your story. It means a lot to a codie like me because it's stories like yours that give me hope for my son. I pray that one day he will find a better way, just as you did.
So, thank you for "hope" and for sharing your recovery with all of us.
Hugs,
everything is already ok
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
thanks (((((Ann))))), your right there is always HOPE
hey (((((Phinny)))), yep the road is as it is and we make our way along it. Sometimes with joy love and in my case singing and dancing (silly dances)
Kevin
hey (((((Phinny)))), yep the road is as it is and we make our way along it. Sometimes with joy love and in my case singing and dancing (silly dances)
Kevin
everything is already ok
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
Thanks ((Capiainee))) the magic is its all one day at a time
I will let you know what I do, but it will be good Mostly meetings and going to a restaraunt with other members this evening I think.
Kevin
I will let you know what I do, but it will be good
Mostly meetings and going to a restaraunt with other members this evening I think.Kevin
everything is already ok
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
Got tell you, I have had tears running down my face on and off for the last couple of hours. This time they are tears of joy and gratitude not of hopelessness and despair.
I have this amazing feeling that I have everything I need. How different is that from that empty gnawing feeling in my gut that always wants more more more, that I lived with for decades.
Kevin
I have this amazing feeling that I have everything I need. How different is that from that empty gnawing feeling in my gut that always wants more more more, that I lived with for decades.
Kevin
NA Rocks!
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Location Location
Posts: 517
Wahoooooooo!!!! Big, big, big congratulations to you, Nogard! I'm SOOO excited and proud of you. Lots of hugs and kisses! (((((nogard))))
I love that!
Me, too! Isn't it amazing?! I never talked on the phone .... now (my one-year will be on June 4th) my phone is ringing constantly, and I'm always out doing something with my NA sisters. It's such a blessing ... a real gift of recovery. I'm so happy for you!
Originally Posted by nogard
.... I pray each day to my HP who I choose to call DAD.
Originally Posted by nogard
I spend lots of time talking with my daughter and with my AA/NA friends. I have never in all my life had some many friends or so many Phone No's.
Love, Kelly (T4C)
everything is already ok
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
hey best , thanks for those kind words
One Year ago, I started right here at SR and people held me for the whole weekend and I got to a meeting on Monday. I did not have a clue what was going on I was very sick in body, mind and spirit. No I had no idea what lay ahead best and its still a miracle to me that I am here and feeling so well.
One Year ago all I could do was hold on, I smoked about 3 packs of cigs every day and sat at my computer talking to people in SR mostly, the only right thing I did was not to pick up and as a friend of mine says; "... you can't do a right thing wrong...".
One Year ago all I knew was that I had had enough and was not ready to die or maim myself. I did not want to stop drinking and face reality and did not know how to ask for help, but when I woke up on 2st May 2005 I knew I needed help and I belive now that my HP guided me literally to here and then AA and NA to the doors of recovery.
One Year later, I belive that everything and anything is possible. I also know that life is just that life, I can't and don't try to control it, I simply live it one day at a time.
If I in any way have touched someone here or anywhere then that both makes me soar to new heights and keeps me grounded. I need people to keep coming into recovery and to stay around or else I have no one to be in recovery with and Today I am very aware that I do this with many many others and with God.
Love Kevin
PS Today (these days) I feel so liberated so free from the bondage, no longer a slave to my addiction. This most precious of gifts was given to me for free and freely. I am glad I have grabbed hold with both hands. Onward one day at a time.
One Year ago, I started right here at SR and people held me for the whole weekend and I got to a meeting on Monday. I did not have a clue what was going on I was very sick in body, mind and spirit. No I had no idea what lay ahead best and its still a miracle to me that I am here and feeling so well.
One Year ago all I could do was hold on, I smoked about 3 packs of cigs every day and sat at my computer talking to people in SR mostly, the only right thing I did was not to pick up and as a friend of mine says; "... you can't do a right thing wrong...".
One Year ago all I knew was that I had had enough and was not ready to die or maim myself. I did not want to stop drinking and face reality and did not know how to ask for help, but when I woke up on 2st May 2005 I knew I needed help and I belive now that my HP guided me literally to here and then AA and NA to the doors of recovery.
One Year later, I belive that everything and anything is possible. I also know that life is just that life, I can't and don't try to control it, I simply live it one day at a time.
If I in any way have touched someone here or anywhere then that both makes me soar to new heights and keeps me grounded. I need people to keep coming into recovery and to stay around or else I have no one to be in recovery with and Today I am very aware that I do this with many many others and with God.
Love Kevin
PS Today (these days) I feel so liberated so free from the bondage, no longer a slave to my addiction. This most precious of gifts was given to me for free and freely. I am glad I have grabbed hold with both hands. Onward one day at a time.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Recovery
Posts: 3,229
Thank you for sharing your story and the road of recovery Kevin. You are such an inspiration! I am sitting here with tears in my eyes because your words are just so full of hope and I can really see how much better life can get. Those words are giving me something to look forward to and something to work for. I am sure that your story will touch many other hearts as well. It has been a true honor to be here as you have worked hard on your recovery. I am so glad that you are here with us and you bless us all with your wonderful presence. Congratulations Kevin!! I am so proud of you!
Love,
Cheryl
Love,
Cheryl
everything is already ok
Thread Starter
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Melbourne Victoria Australia
Posts: 19,793
hey (((((Vic))))) thanks and great to see you here. You are an important part of my recovery and I am so glad your back
(((((okietiger))))) thanks and of course my inspiration also comes from my peers, you guys
(((((Cheryl))))) I look forward to writing you such a lovely message when you celebrate your 1st year one day at a time. Thanks
Kevin
(((((okietiger))))) thanks and of course my inspiration also comes from my peers, you guys
(((((Cheryl))))) I look forward to writing you such a lovely message when you celebrate your 1st year one day at a time. Thanks
Kevin
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