camellion

I have had a drinking problem for about a year now. I just gradually got worse and worse. I desperatley need and WANT help. BUT I trapped! I really need to get out of this environment to a "safe" place to detox and figure out how I got to this point. My problem(besides the drinking of course)is that my family depends on me completely! My husband travels alot for business and recreation so I am in charge of my daughter the dogs the pool the yard and soooo on.. Also my husband is very well known to most everyone here. How can I go to rehab without someone we know finding out and embarrasing my family. Please if anyone has any suggestions I am all ears.

daddysgirl29

Hi Cam, and welcome to SR!! Glad you're here and reaching out - others will be along soon. (Remember that SR is all over the world, so if no one responds right away, that's why - diff't time zones!)

Any possibility you have family that could come stay w/ your kids for a few days, or about a week? I went into detox and stayed for 7 days, but that was my choice (they said I could go after 5). You might not need to be in there that long. Your dr. would know what's best. Have you talked to him/her? Does your husband know the situation you're in? Sorry for all the questions - just trying to get a better feel of where you are.

You could always go to detox in another city(?) if you're worried about people finding out. Where there's a will there's a way!! By the way, detox is SO worth it if you think you really need it, and the best part is, you only have to do it once!!

Hang around and read, keep posting, etc. You're not alone!
-DG

camellion

DG I am very serious about starting my recovery. Thank you for the advice. I hope this doesn't come out wrong..but it is nice to know I am not alone.. I have lived w/this in secret for a long time. Cam

Anna

Hi Camellion and Welcome,

I'm glad you found us and that you've made the decision to stop drinking. Have you talked to a dr about stopping because it can possibly be dangerous? I didn't want others to find out either, I was so sure that no one knew. But, I realized later, that there were some people who knew and it wasn't the secret that I was so sure it was. The main thing is to do whatever you need to do to get through this!

camellion

I am sure you are right Anna. about the fact that more people know than I realize. I just feel so lost and out of control of my life. thanx,Cam

camellion

DG, Oh and no I have no family here. And none that I could go to anyway. They are the "kick em" when their down kind of family!!!

CarolD

Welcome Czm...

Please consult with your doctor before quitting.
There are short term meds available for de tox.

Treatment centers and de tox facilities are not mecessarily the same thing. Check with a your doctor as to what you need.

Let us know how things are going..we understand and
you are not alone with your concerns.

Hope

Glad that you are here seeking answers. Remember that you are not alone!

ASH

Hi Camellion, Welcome to SR, glad your here.
You need to speak with your Dr. to determine if you need rehab and if you do then what others think will have to take a backseat to your physical and mental health. If you were in the hospital, (which you will be) arrangements will be made to take care of you daughter. Perhaps she can stay with a friend for a few days? Would have been a dream for me at that age.

Talk to you Dr, and find out what you need and then take care of yourself.
We all think we will die of embarassment or that our husband is too important,
but that didnt stop Betty Ford and I dont know who thinks less of her for it!!
Keep reading and posting, you will find and way!

earlybird

There ARE ways to keep it confidential,...but, really,...whats most important? You getting the help you need and saving your life, or your pride? You must be willing to do whatever it takes. Besides,...dont you think that your husband being well-known in your community means that people already know that his wife has a drinking problem? Whats worse in that senario? The wife whos a drunk......or the wife who was a drunk who turned her life around? Im sure you can do this. Just do it for YOU. Not your husband, kids, or people around you. For YOU. Because when its all boiled down, you are all you have in the end. Take care of YOU.

c'est la vie

Well said earlybird!
Stick around, gather information, and build up your strength to do what you need to do to help yourself, regardless of who thinks what.

Anna

It is hard to navigate through the early time of sobriety. Shame is often such a big issue and I remember just wanting to hide and never come out. Of course, that's not realistic and you have to find a way to get through your days. I hope you find a way to get the help you need that works for you.

daddysgirl29

Cam - how ya doin' today?

camellion

The saying is "there is strength in #'s". You guys have been soooo great in your attentive responses!!!!!
My husband is out of town & usually this is a really tempting time to "tie one on. I was coming back from taking my daughter back to school from an ortho apptmnt (1:26pm)& saw a billboard advertising a new vodka(as you know all it takes is that suggestion) and I didn't stop @ the liquor store!!!! Thursdays is my day I usually start my weekend bing.........so this was big for me. I know I have a long way to go....but it's a start....RIGHT????

Anna

It's a great start and it's probably a good idea to try to keep yourself busy this weekend. Find things that you like to do and enjoy yourself.

daddysgirl29

Exactly!! Fill your days w/ stuff that makes you really happy and fulfilled (and won't lead to a hangover...) It's springtime, so take the kids outside!!

ASH

"and I didn't stop @ the liquor store!!!! "


Well done!!!:

camellion

Hello everyone,
Why is it sooooo incredibly hard to just put it down and say NO more?
Well...I stumbled this weekend. I started drinking Fri. night and didn't stop until last night(and that is only because I didn't have anything in the house to drink) Just like every Monday I feel sick and having a hard time getting things accomplished.

Anna

Well, use this as an opportunity to learn. Why did you pick up a drink on Friday night and what can you do to prevent the same thing happening again. Planning was crucial for me during early sobriety. I had to know that I would be doing 'something else' during the difficult times.

Hang in there!

camellion

Thank you for your encouraging words...This is going to be a SUPER hard week for me. My daughter leaves for summer w/her biological father and my husband will leave the same day for 10 days. My best friend is pregnant w/twins and all my other friends have their children. I am not sure what to do w/myslf for the time period that my husband w/be goine.