cultivatinglily

I have waited for many things in my life. I have waited around at work because I didn't want to go home to my husband on his day off. (Who wants to go home to someone who spent their entire day off drinking?) I have waited and played possum untill after he went to sleep, when he would come home at 4:30am so that I wouldn't have to deal with him. I have waited for his promises to come thru, for him to stop drinking and work on himself. Funny thing is he wanted me to work on myself too. And in doing just that I learned to love myself enough to say I'm done waiting. I told him to get help in no less than a week, or I was leaving. He agreed to it, I figured he'd come up with excuses to not meet the timeline, that he would try to keep me waiting. He went to the psycologist, and stopped drinking. Now I am waiting for him to come home from work. He's going to check in at a 30 day clinic tonight. We won't know if it will be for 30 days in or out until they do his assessement. I believe in him. I believe he can get better. I believe if I wait that my faith in him will be worth the wait.

susane1408

Welcome back! Cultivatinglily
As you've been registered here for quite some time I guess you'll have read all the 'stickies' if not it's a good idea.
I do hope your hubby gets into the clinic and begins working on himself; it would be good for you to take time to heal yourself too.

minnie

Hi there Lily!!

How's about filling in some of that waiting time by getting some help for yourself? Counselling, Al-anon, reading (Melodie Beattie books are particularly good), sharing on here?

It's all too easy to think that only "they" have the problem, but we do need to recognise that we have been affected too. And this is all the more important when the alcoholic starts recovery, because the old ways of relating no longer apply.

Hope you stick around.